Lack of genetic markers makes the child feel as if she doesn't fit, doesn't belong. Child has to figure out how to be in the family. Hypervigilant. Tries to adapt.
Children are not a "blank slate" at birth. Most of personality traits are genetic (but personality must be distinguished from behavioral coping style.) Adoptive parents cannot expect the child to be like them.
“Children are not a “blank slate” at birth.”
Yeah but try telling adoptive parents that, to say nothing of leftwingers.
As an adoptee I want to thank you for linking to that page...
I just read your user page, and I’m trying not to cry right now... I agree with EVERYTHING you’ve said, I could’ve written it myself. All of it - every word is TRUTH. I’m happy for you that you were able to know the name of your birth mother, I unfortunately will probably never know...
I agree with this and I came to this conclusion by raising and showing purebred dogs for 25 years.
Puppies do not learn certain traits from their parents. One of the most amazing lessons of this was that once we had an Old English Sheepdog who loved to sit on chairs, seats of lawnmowers, etc.
Once I was talking to a friend in Canada who had purchased a daughter of our dog. The friend pointed out to me that the dog she purchased was sitting at that moment on a kitchen chair.
At the same moment, her mother was sitting on one of our kitchen chairs.