What Michael Phelps Should Have Said; Smoking pot shouldn't be a crime. Or the public's business.

REASON Magazine ^ | February 2, 2009 | Radley Balko

[Eric Blair 2084]

Dear America,

I take it back. I don’t apologize.

Because you know what? It’s none of your goddamned business. I work my ass off 10 months a year. It’s that hard work that gave you all those gooey feelings of patriotism last summer. If during my brief window of down time I want to relax, enjoy myself, and partake of a substance that’s a hell of a lot less bad for me than alcohol, tobacco, or, frankly, most of the prescription drugs most of you are taking, well, you can spare me the lecture.

I put myself through hell. I make my body do things nature never really intended us to endure. All world-class athletes do. We do it because you love to watch us push ourselves as far as we can possibly go. Some of us get hurt. Sometimes permanently. You’re watching the Super Bowl tonight. You’re watching 300 pound men smash each while running at full speed, in full pads. You know what the average life expectancy of an NFL player is? Fifty-five. That’s about 20 years shorter than your average non-NFL player. Yet you watch. And cheer. And you jump up spill your beer when a linebacker lays out a wide receiver on a crossing route across the middle. The harder he gets hit, the louder and more enthusiastically you scream.

Yet you all get bent out of shape when Ricky Williams, or I, or Josh Howard smoke a little dope to relax. Why? Because the idiots you’ve elected to make your laws have, without a shred of evidence, beat it into your head that smoking marijuana is something akin to drinking antifreeze, and done only by dirty hippies and sex offenders.

You’ll have to pardon my cynicism. But I call bullshit. You don’t give a damn about my health. You just get a voyeuristic thrill from watching an elite athlete fall from grace–all the better if you get to exercise a little moral righteousness in the process. And it’s hypocritical righteousness at that, given that 40 percent of you have tried pot at least once in your lives.

Here’s a crazy thought: If I can smoke a little dope and go on to win 14 Olympic gold medals, maybe pot smokers aren’t doomed to lives of couch surfing and video games, as our moronic government would have us believe. In fact, the list of successful pot smokers includes not just world class athletes like me, Howard, Williams, and others, it includes Nobel Prize winners, Pulitzer Prize winners, the last three U.S. presidents, several Supreme Court justices, and luminaries and success stories from all sectors of business and the arts, sciences, and humanities.

[Eric Blair 2084]

I feel compelled in the name of political correctness to note that....

I have not smoked pot since the Reagan administration in college.

The crap just never agreed with me. It made me more paranoid than I already am. I had scary thoughts of a Marxist revolution taking over America and I felt like I was about to die. But I love the idea of somebody, anybody telling the world.....whoa, wait a minute, let's go to the video replay booth. I'm throwing a challenge flag on everything you have ever been taught in public service announcements.

The apology is being reviewed.

Upon further review, there has been a reversal. There will be no apology.

[Eric Blair 2084]

Ping. Thought you would get a kick out of this.

Nobody posted Radley Balko’s piece yet. I like my addendum better. :-) Than again, I am so vain I like the smell of my own farts. :-)

[Perdogg]

He should have blamed turbo-tax.

[Eric Blair 2084]

In fairness, Daschle and Geithner didn’t inhale their turbo tax bogus printouts. They just suck.

[Mr. Blonde]

That is way more articulate than I’ve ever seen the real Michael Phelps. Still I’m sure that is closer than what he wanted to say than what was said.

[bamahead]

Libertarian ping! Click here to get added or here to be removed or post a message here!

[Moonman62]

Phelps makes a fortune from his image. Being a pothead isn’t a good image.

[Moonman62]

The crap just never agreed with me. It made me more paranoid than I already am. I had scary thoughts of a Marxist revolution taking over America and I felt like I was about to die.

I think it did permanent brain damage in your case.

[Hillarys Gate Cult]

He should have said that he looked around, realized he was in Columbia and needed something to make what he saw go away. I’d agree with that.

[SoCalPol]

He has already been stopped for drunk driving,
drugs doesn’t make a person’s drive any better.

IF a person has to take something to change their mind set,
time to see what your problem is that you can’t face life and the real world.

[an amused spectator]

Radley Balko clearly doesn't what OCD legal types with a blank checkbook could do to a defiant young lad like Phelps.

Ask the young lads from Duke - they could tell him.

[Jolla]

I have smoked and inhaled a time or two, made me kind of quite and I felt like a step or two behind in the conversation, thats about it, never really saw the point in it.

[Eric Blair 2084]

I think it did permanent brain damage in your case.

I don't have any drain bamage.

[Mr. Blonde]

Did he drive after he smoked?

I take it you have never taken any kind of stimulant or depressant? No alcohol? Nothing?

[bamahead]

It would take huge guts on Michael Phelps behalf to do that, but I think the applause he'd win could far outweigh the number of lilly livers he'd offend. The first sentence of the last paragraph pretty much says it :)

Here’s a crazy thought: If I can smoke a little dope and go on to win 14 Olympic gold medals, maybe pot smokers aren’t doomed to lives of couch surfing and video games, as our moronic government would have us believe.

[John W]

Phelps probably weighed being the poster boy for legalizing pot versus a billion dollars in endorsements and made the right call for him and his family.

[dalereed]

More Libertarian crap!

[org.whodat]

LOL, the pot head is a pot head, he will always be labeled as such. Makes no difference. The moron blew millions on a little weed. Proving to the world he was truly learning disabled.

[Eric Blair 2084]

That actually wasn’t the last paragraph. There’s more to Radley’s rant.

See post above. My drain bamage from smoking pot in 1988 led me to forget to click the “this is an excerpt” button.

[Rebelbase]

My neighbor’s pothead kids say they want to become Olympic athletes now.

[Eric Blair 2084]

yep, more libertarian crap.

"If you analyze it I believe the very heart and soul of conservatism is libertarianism. I think conservatism is really a misnomer just as liberalism is a misnomer for the liberals–if we were back in the days of the Revolution, so-called conservatives today would be the Liberals and the liberals would be the Tories. The basis of conservatism is a desire for less government interference or less centralized authority or more individual freedom and this is a pretty general description also of what libertarianism is. Now, I can’t say that I will agree with all the things that the present group who call themselves Libertarians in the sense of a party say, because I think that like in any political movement there are shades, and there are libertarians who are almost over at the point of wanting no government at all or anarchy. I believe there are legitimate government functions. There is a legitimate need in an orderly society for some government to maintain freedom or we will have tyranny by individuals. The strongest man on the block will run the neighborhood. We have government to insure that we don’t each one of us have to carry a club to defend ourselves. But again, I stand on my statement that I think that libertarianism and conservatism are travelling the same path".

--Ronald Reagan

Inside Ronald Reagan: A Reason Interview from July 1975

[rb22982]

The war on marijuana was started by a Democrat (FDR). It was always about control and nothing else. The whole War on Drugs is a joke. We spend $50-$70 billion a year for no results and don't even make a half a$$ attempt to close our borders to prevent drugs from coming in--all it does is provide a lot of government jobs and keeping thugs making hundreds of millions a year. If the government wanted to really eliminate drug use, it could to a large degreee--but it would involve a lot of the same types of tactics required to eliminate illegals (close the borders) & the welfare state (drug tests to be recipients to gov handouts). Alcohol is far more harmful in every way. With our current economic crises, this is a minor issue but at the very least we should decriminalize marijuana usage for adults over 21 and save our tax dollars.

On a personal level, I hate the stuff--tried it twice at 18 and felt sick both times. I prefer the beer I have in my hand currently.

[Eric Blair 2084]

My neighbor’s pothead kids say they want to become Olympic athletes now.

Spend 15 hours a day in the pool training and have the God given ability and they can pull it off as an Olympic swimmer.

Unless they rack disiprin. If not they can still smoke pot, play video games and make the Winter Olympic team in curling. What kind of skill does it take to walk around with a broom on ice following a disk. There is a "sport" for everyone apparently.

[dalereed]

Hey doper, you belong in prison!

[Eric Blair 2084]

I still like the original graphic.

[thefactor]

didn't have to be an apology.

HOWEVER! he should be prepared to have all of his endorsements dry up. he may not have to be a role model, but he asks everyone to buy the products he endorses. so he has to maintain a certain amount of public image.

why don't people realize that the US isn't just NYC and LA? people in those cities might not see an issue with a little weed smoking, but people in fly-over country might.

[SoCalPol]

I don’t deal with mind altering drugs and I don’t drink.

I learned to face life early, Worked and supported myself
over 40 yrs while having diseases and disabilities including several orthopedic surgeries, neurosurgery, cancer surgery, etc.
I live with the fact my cancer comes back and have tests
every three months.

You just deal with it and face reality.

[ARepublicanForAllReasons]

Phelps... made the right call for him and his family.

I agree. If he did the Libertarian rant on how pot smoking is virtually harmless and the right of any free person (which it IS!) the rest of his life would be about his defense of doing drugs.

Sure, he could have said that, but perhaps he should have said simply "I didn't inhale."

[Eric Blair 2084]

I haven’t smoked pot in 20 years. Read the first post.

[gargoyle]

...Bravo, paranoia just became reality. Roll another one and pass it over to me...

[Hildy]

Fly over country is changing...

[Eric Blair 2084]

didn't have to be an apology. HOWEVER! he should be prepared to have all of his endorsements dry up. he may not have to be a role model, but he asks everyone to buy the products he endorses. so he has to maintain a certain amount of public image.

Exactly. Advertising is all about branding. You want to convey to the potential buyers that if you use their product you are like _______ (fill in the blank).

There is a HUGE difference between what private companies want to associate with and what should or shouldn't be legal or illegal in the eyes of the State.

[txnativegop]

Have you ever played curling? There is a lot of hard work that goes into it. Is it football, baseball, hockey, no, but hard in its own right.

[dalereed]

Marajuana use would stop if anyone caught with it had to do 10 years of hard labor which would include building their own shelter and growing their own food.

A second offense, mandatory execution.

[libertarian27]

Carrie nation!!!!
You are alive!!!!

Where’ve ya’ been?

[northislander]

He should return the medals and go straight to jail if it was a crime at the time.

[bamahead]

I still use the old one occasionally :)

“YOU MANIACS! DAMN YOU!”

I find myself screaming that at CSPAN lately...

[stockpirate]

In our early history the nation grew hemp to make rope for the shipping industry. When hemp is grown it has these little leaves on it that the people smoked.

There is some indication that some of the founder’s of our once great nation smoked pot.

[Eric Blair 2084]

Have you ever played curling? There is a lot of hard work that goes into it. Is it football, baseball, hockey, no, but hard in its own right.

You must be Gaelic if you can appreciate it. Any activity where the drunker you get the better you are at it, can't by definition be a "sport'. See bowling or darts. :-)

[Mark]

Prop 8 in California passed and the libs are screaming. Get a law passed- let the people decide. I vote NO.

[stockpirate]

In our early history the nation grew hemp to make rope for the shipping industry. When hemp is grown it has these little leaves on it that the people smoked.

There is some indication that some of the founder’s of our once great nation smoked pot.

[stockpirate]

In our early history the nation grew hemp to make rope for the shipping industry. When hemp is grown it has these little leaves on it that the people smoked.

There is some indication that some of the founder’s of our once great nation smoked pot.

[DakotaRed]

Isn’t it sort of odd that so many who readily condemn smoking tobacco and support all smoking bans imposed on it, are also the same ones who jump in to support smoking pot?

[SoCalPol]

I live in a large city and enough problem with drunk drivers and pot heads and the murders they committ on the streets

[Trailerpark Badass]

Marajuana use would stop if anyone caught with it had to do 10 years of hard labor which would include building their own shelter and growing their own food.

And yet, no one, other than you, apparently, wants marijuana banned that badly.

Sorry.

[ARepublicanForAllReasons]

A second offense, mandatory execution.

That's how they keep drugs under control in Singapore. But would you want to live there?

[Mr. Blonde]

Yeah, pot heads there is a violent bunch.

[rb22982]

LOL So what should someone who drinks beer get oh wise one? Alcohol is more intoxicating, damaging to the brain/body, addictive, economically punative, etc than marijuana. Not to mention there are 0 deaths a year to marijuana overdosing while tens of thousands of alcohol deaths. Give me a break. If your biggest concern is someone smoking an herb, laughing at dumb movies, and eating cheetos I think you need to re-prioritize the way you look at life—seriously.

[Mr. Blonde]

Is jail time even the punishment for smoking marijuana in South Carolina? He obviously doesn’t have a lot there, I can’t imagine they are throwing people in jail for that little.

Also, why should an athlete who has never failed a drug test and who has (to my knowledge) never been accused of taking a performance enhancing drug have to forfeit his legitimately earned medals? Do his records not stand either?

Apologies if you are being sarcastic.

[Eric Blair 2084]

Isn’t it sort of odd that so many who readily condemn smoking tobacco and support all smoking bans imposed on it, are also the same ones who jump in to support smoking pot?

It is odd. Until you stop and think of them in a VW bus back at Woodstock. They got smart. They cut their hair and stopped burning the American flag. Nobody took them seriously when they acted like horse tooth jackasses and got arrested. So they decided to go into law and journalism and change the country from within. Those people are aging hippie liberal douchebags. Now they are in control. Don't confuse them with libertarians.