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ONE sentence from the stimulus bill (Ask them to explain this ONE sentence)
Read the Stimulus ^ | 2-9-09 | Nancy Pelosi

Posted on 02/09/2009 10:07:40 AM PST by Indy Pendance

A sentence from the stimulus bill:

“For transit capital assistance grants, $6,000,000,000 (increased by $1,500,000,000), of which $5,400,000,000 (increased by $1,350,000,000) shall be for grants under 5 section 5307 of title 49, United States Code and shall be apportioned in accordance with section 5336 of such title (other than subsections (i)(1) and (j)) but may not be combined or commingled with any other funds apportioned under such section 5336, and of which $600,000,000 (increased by $150,000,000) shall be for grants under section 5311 of such title and shall be apportioned in accordance with such section 5311 but may not be combined or commingled with any other funds apportioned under that section: Provided, That of the funds provided for section 5311 under this heading, 3 percent shall be made available for section 5311(c)(1): Provided further, That applicable chapter 53 requirements shall apply except that the Federal share of the costs for which a grant is made under this heading shall be, at the option of the recipient, up to 100 percent: Provided further, In lieu of the requirements of section 1103 of this Act, funds made available under this heading shall be apportioned not later than 7 days after the date of enactment of this Act: Provided further, That for purposes of applying section 1104 of this 25 253 Act to this appropriation, the deadline for grantees to enter into obligations to make use of not less than 50 percent of the funds awarded shall be 90 days after apportionment: Provided further, That the provisions of section 1101(b) of Public Law 109–59 shall apply to funds made available under this heading: Provided further, That not-withstanding any other provision of law, of the funds apportioned in accordance with section 5336, up to three-quarters of 1 percent shall be available for administrative expenses and program management oversight and of the funds apportioned in accordance with section 5311, up to one-half of 1 percent shall be available for administrative expenses and program management oversight and both amounts shall remain available for obligation until September 30, 2012: Provided further, That the preceding proviso shall apply in lieu of the provisions in section 1106 of this Act.”


TOPICS: News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: porkulus
When you write your congressman or senator, ask them to explain this sentence.
1 posted on 02/09/2009 10:07:40 AM PST by Indy Pendance
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To: Indy Pendance

First, we kill all the lawyers...


2 posted on 02/09/2009 10:10:35 AM PST by null and void (We are now in day 21 of our national holiday from reality.)
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To: Indy Pendance
That's one sentence? Good grief.
3 posted on 02/09/2009 10:10:45 AM PST by al_c (Avoid the consequences of erudite vernacular utilized irrespective of necessity)
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To: al_c

Send it to them. What a fricking joke this is.


4 posted on 02/09/2009 10:12:04 AM PST by Indy Pendance (It's a beautiful thing to see him implode!)
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To: Indy Pendance

Easy. Mass transportation, a liberal cause, is going to get 6 billion dollars worth of free money.


5 posted on 02/09/2009 10:13:33 AM PST by DouglasKC
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To: Indy Pendance

It’s simple:
“Bend Over.”


6 posted on 02/09/2009 10:14:09 AM PST by ozark hilljilly (I don't even think I think!)
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To: Indy Pendance

Did anyone try running this through babelfish?


7 posted on 02/09/2009 10:14:45 AM PST by HIDEK6
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To: ozark hilljilly

BOHICA


8 posted on 02/09/2009 10:15:11 AM PST by Pistolshot ("Democrats don't show respect, they just demand respect " - ClearCase_guy)
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To: ozark hilljilly

Ibbity Bibbity, bibbity bab.


9 posted on 02/09/2009 10:15:27 AM PST by massgopguy (I owe everything to George Bailey)
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To: null and void

I think we should go for the politicians first.


10 posted on 02/09/2009 10:16:10 AM PST by Blood of Tyrants (The problem with socialism is that you eventually run out of other people's money. Margret Thatcher)
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To: Indy Pendance

Apparently part of the stimulus package is the hiring of an army of lawyers to figure out what the hell $900,000,000,000 is being spent on.


11 posted on 02/09/2009 10:16:28 AM PST by Made In The USA (Liberalism is a sign of stupidity.)
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To: Indy Pendance

Amtrak, I believe


12 posted on 02/09/2009 10:17:18 AM PST by theDentist (Qwerty ergo typo : I type, therefore I misspelll)
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To: DouglasKC

Uh-huh, and which states or cities have mass transit? Not fly-over country.


13 posted on 02/09/2009 10:18:02 AM PST by bgill
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To: Indy Pendance
For transit capital assistance grants, $6,000,000,000

I think that's for the new jet fleet for Congress, including new private airports for their exclusive use on various Caribbbean and South Pacific resort islands.

14 posted on 02/09/2009 10:20:54 AM PST by Cementjungle
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To: null and void
We don't have time to read the bill/ The need is too urgent. We must act now! /sarc
15 posted on 02/09/2009 10:24:39 AM PST by paul51 (11 September 2001 - Never forget (July 4, 2009 see you there))
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To: Indy Pendance

That’s not a sentence!! Trying to READ it is a sentence (as in punishment)!! That’s like writing War and Peace with no punctuation.

The problem is that it is supposed to be so indecipherable that everyone will ignore it. This NEEDS explanation.


16 posted on 02/09/2009 10:25:18 AM PST by DustyMoment (FloriDUH - proud inventors of pregnant/hanging chads and judicide!!)
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To: Indy Pendance

That’s not a sentence!! Trying to READ it is a sentence (as in punishment)!! That’s like writing War and Peace with no punctuation.

The problem is that it is supposed to be so indecipherable that everyone will ignore it. This NEEDS explanation.


17 posted on 02/09/2009 10:26:05 AM PST by DustyMoment (FloriDUH - proud inventors of pregnant/hanging chads and judicide!!)
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To: Blood of Tyrants; null and void
...I think we should go for the politicians first...

Since most politicians are lawyers killing the lawyers first will get most of them plus there won't be anyone left to prosecute us.

18 posted on 02/09/2009 10:26:24 AM PST by FReepaholic (Diversity = .45 .357 .223 .38 ...)
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To: massgopguy

as Beavis used to say “words,words ,words...”


19 posted on 02/09/2009 10:26:26 AM PST by WOBBLY BOB (ACORN:American Corruption for Obama Right Now)
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To: Indy Pendance
When I read this kind of nonsense, this is how I interpret it:

"When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

20 posted on 02/09/2009 10:26:59 AM PST by AngryJawa (Obama's Success is America's Failure)
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To: Indy Pendance

No, ask him to diagram it.


21 posted on 02/09/2009 10:27:37 AM PST by Liberty Ship ("Lord, make me fast and accurate.")
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To: Indy Pendance

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious


22 posted on 02/09/2009 10:27:52 AM PST by TornadoAlley3 (Obama is everything Oklahoma is not.)
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To: Made In The USA

I had no idea that there were so many lawyers running around unemployed. Wow. It is starting to make sense.

can I throw up now?


23 posted on 02/09/2009 10:30:47 AM PST by o_zarkman44 (Since when is paying more, but getting less, considered Patriotic?)
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To: theDentist

Like all good NAZIs, the demoncrats have been trying to force everyone on to the train since the sixties. Only after we are all aboard will they try to get them to run on time!


24 posted on 02/09/2009 10:31:17 AM PST by cartoonistx
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To: Indy Pendance

It depends on what the meaning of stimulus is.


25 posted on 02/09/2009 10:31:36 AM PST by sweetiepiezer (I have a Pal in Sarah)
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To: bgill

Welcome to Free Republic!


26 posted on 02/09/2009 10:33:00 AM PST by o_zarkman44 (Since when is paying more, but getting less, considered Patriotic?)
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To: Liberty Ship
Here's another related to adding $25 to unemployment:

Any agreement under this section shall provide that the State agency of the State will make payments of regular compensation to individuals in amounts and to the extent that they would be determined if the State law of the State were applied, with respect to any week for which the individual is (disregarding this section) otherwise entitled under the State law to receive regular compensation, as if such State law had been modified in a manner such that the amount of regular compensation (including dependents’ allowances) payable for any week shall be equal to the amount determined under the State law (before the application of this paragraph) plus an additional $25.

27 posted on 02/09/2009 10:36:42 AM PST by aimhigh
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To: DouglasKC
Nassau County on LI has two 'black' towns, Freeport and Hempstead (first school in the country named for Hussein).

Freeport is slated to get $51.6 million (all for what is really urban renewal).

Hempstead is slated for $158 million (same usage).

No other town on LI is slated for any money.

28 posted on 02/09/2009 10:37:39 AM PST by wtc911 ("How you gonna get back down that hill?")
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To: bgill
Uh-huh, and which states or cities have mass transit? Not fly-over country.

Well yeah, there's not a whole lot of buddies to pay off in the midwest.

29 posted on 02/09/2009 10:37:58 AM PST by DouglasKC
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To: Indy Pendance

Obama’s ultimate goal is to unionize 30% of the population, including illegals, under the SEIU, which is variably State Employee Union or Service Employee Union. The healthcare reform is to give these union workers healthcare coverage like the politicians have. (Remember Obama said this in one of his speeches) The SEIU has been working on this in California, making deals with employers of healthcare workers, that empowers the unions, but does not raise salaries for the workers.


30 posted on 02/09/2009 10:39:16 AM PST by Eva (CHANGE- the post modern euphemism for Marxist revolution.)
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To: null and void

You beat me to it! I was going to say “First, we kill all the lawyers...”
It’s a good idea!


31 posted on 02/09/2009 10:39:59 AM PST by Leftism is Mentally Deranged (liberalism = serious mental deficiency)
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To: Indy Pendance

Here’s a link to the Wordle “word cloud” of this monster.

http://www.wordle.net/gallery/wrdl/523804/Just_one_little%2C_356-word_sentence_from_the_%22Stimulus_Package%22


32 posted on 02/09/2009 10:46:29 AM PST by conservativeharleyguy (Democrats: Over 60 million fooled daily!)
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To: o_zarkman44

It must have been written by Arlen Sphincter.


33 posted on 02/09/2009 11:07:09 AM PST by Melchior
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To: Indy Pendance

According to the original 13th Amendment, Lawyers would not be IN Congress.

I sent emails to Sen Specter, Sen Snowe, Sen Voinovich, and Sen Collins asking them to reply and to explain that one sentence. If they can do so to my understanding, I told them I would support their choice to vote as a RINO/Democrat.

Let’s see if I get any responses. I’m not holding my breath.


34 posted on 02/09/2009 11:11:13 AM PST by HighlyOpinionated (Social justice cannot be attained by violence. Violence kills what it intends to create. JPII)
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To: Indy Pendance

I think what those last bits of the sentence are saying is that at least 1-1/4% of this grant—that is, $75 million—must be set aside for the use of the aristos at the top of this ant heap.

Even if there are local or other laws forbidding such pork guzzling by the top managers, they get $75 million to spend on themselves, however they choose, and no one can stop them.


35 posted on 02/09/2009 11:13:06 AM PST by Cicero (Marcus Tullius)
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To: Indy Pendance

Done.


36 posted on 02/09/2009 11:13:53 AM PST by al_c (Avoid the consequences of erudite vernacular utilized irrespective of necessity)
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To: Indy Pendance

that reads like one of my husband’s sentences


37 posted on 02/09/2009 11:14:41 AM PST by EDINVA
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To: Indy Pendance

OUtstanding. I just sent this off to my Senators, asking for their explanation. Don’t expect a response before the vote, but...


38 posted on 02/09/2009 11:15:46 AM PST by PubliusMM (RKBA; a matter of fact, not opinion. 01-20-2013: Change we can look forward to.)
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To: Indy Pendance

Maybe part of the stimulus bill could be used to buy the writter of this sentence some periods.


39 posted on 02/09/2009 11:18:33 AM PST by NavyCanDo (You think you have enough guns, until the Zombies come.)
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To: al_c; PubliusMM

If you guys get one, please post their responses. I will too. Ha, I don’t expect anything except a canned form letter from my goofus senators.


40 posted on 02/09/2009 11:20:00 AM PST by Indy Pendance (It's a beautiful thing to see him implode!)
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To: null and void

That’s a good start!


41 posted on 02/09/2009 11:27:20 AM PST by AuntB (The right to vote in America: Blacks 1870; Women 1920; Native Americans 1925; Foreigners 2008)
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To: maica

A thirteen line sentence! What ever happened to the simplification concept?


42 posted on 02/09/2009 11:31:09 AM PST by Freee-dame
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To: Indy Pendance

Thats a whopper of a sentence.... I don’t read bureaucrat


43 posted on 02/09/2009 11:33:45 AM PST by GeronL (Had the flu. Not well yet.)
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To: Indy Pendance
We REALLY need these guys runnin' the joint:


44 posted on 02/09/2009 11:35:24 AM PST by TADSLOS (McCain always has a job as Obama's Butt Boy when he loses his seat in 2010)
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To: Blood of Tyrants

Nope.. You go after the PR wing first...


45 posted on 02/09/2009 11:41:07 AM PST by myself6 (.)
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To: Indy Pendance
It will be of little avail to the people that the laws are made by men of their own choice, if the laws be so voluminous that they cannot be read, or so incoherent that they cannot be understood; if they be repealed or revised before they are promulgated, or undergo such incessant changes that no man who knows what the law is today can guess what it will be to-morrow.
James Madison Federalist No. 62, 1788
46 posted on 02/09/2009 11:43:13 AM PST by MamaTexan (If you don't think government IS the problem, you're not looking hard enough)
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To: MamaTexan

Thanks for posting that quote.


47 posted on 02/09/2009 11:50:16 AM PST by Indy Pendance (It's a beautiful thing to see him implode!)
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To: Indy Pendance

They’re from the government and they’re here to HELP us.


48 posted on 02/09/2009 2:34:30 PM PST by TheConservativeParty (That's Mrs.Chief Master Sgt. to you sonny.)
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To: Indy Pendance

bttt


49 posted on 02/09/2009 3:23:53 PM PST by SuperLuminal (Where is another agitator for republicanism like Sam Adams when we need him?)
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To: AngryJawa
When I read this kind of nonsense, this is how I interpret it:

"When in the Course of human events, it becomes necessary for one people to dissolve the political bands which have connected them with another, and to assume among the powers of the earth, the separate and equal station to which the Laws of Nature and of Nature’s God entitle them, a decent respect to the opinions of mankind requires that they should declare the causes which impel them to the separation.

Post of the day, or maybe the year.

50 posted on 02/09/2009 6:54:34 PM PST by little jeremiah (Leave illusion, come to the truth. Leave the darkness, come to the light.)
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