Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Woman Gatecrashes Funeral And Hits Deceased With Magic Wand
anorak ^ | 6th, March 2009 | Staff

Posted on 03/08/2009 7:19:52 AM PDT by tlb

AT the Church of God in Gray Court, South Carolina, Nicole Marie-Loretta Leonard has joined the funeral procession.

She enacts a funeral danced in front of the service, waves a wand over the coffin, opens it and hits the deceased man on the head with a wand. By way of finale she throws the flowers from the casket at the bereaved family.

She drives off in a burgundy Toyota with North Carolina plates.

Police respond and pull Nicole Marie-Loretta Leonard over. She admits it all.

It, says she, “felt it was the right thing to do at the time.”

(Excerpt) Read more at anorak.co.uk ...


TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society; US: North Carolina; US: South Carolina
KEYWORDS: funeral; nutjob; psycho; psyco; wand; witch
US sources were banned Gannett sites or blogs.

Hold my wand and watch this.

1 posted on 03/08/2009 7:19:52 AM PDT by tlb
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: tlb

If only we could all wave a wand and it’d be 2007 again.


2 posted on 03/08/2009 7:23:13 AM PDT by bgill
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: tlb

Sounds like the local shrink has his work cut out for him with this one....


3 posted on 03/08/2009 7:32:49 AM PDT by Farmer Dean (168 grains of instant conflict resolution)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: tlb

Sounds like (Magic Wand) a mans fantasy.


4 posted on 03/08/2009 7:35:28 AM PDT by TruthWillWin (The problem with socialism is that you eventually run out of other peoples money.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: tlb

She should have worn her “Boots of Escaping”.


5 posted on 03/08/2009 7:36:44 AM PDT by KC_Conspirator
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

Comment #6 Removed by Moderator

To: KC_Conspirator

LOL


7 posted on 03/08/2009 7:45:22 AM PDT by Gondring (Paul Revere would have been flamed as a naysayer troll and told to go back to Boston.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: retrokitten; CholeraJoe; Tax-chick

She musta got into Trelawney’s cooking sherry.


8 posted on 03/08/2009 7:46:40 AM PDT by Tijeras_Slim
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Tijeras_Slim

The real question is, did the dead guy get up?

“Well, I ain’t sittin’ up with the dead no more, I don’t know ‘bout you!”


9 posted on 03/08/2009 7:48:59 AM PDT by Tax-chick ("There are more enjoyable ways of going to Hell." ~ St. Bernard)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: TruthWillWin

If it was the Hitachi version, I think it’s more a female fantasy. :)


10 posted on 03/08/2009 7:55:40 AM PDT by Sherman Logan (Everyone has a right to his own opinion, but not to his own facts.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: tlb
Harry Potter syndrome.
11 posted on 03/08/2009 8:15:13 AM PDT by 4yearlurker (The ground at Arlington is moving & shaking.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: tlb

The author must have been schooled in a government facility.
The writing is horrible.


12 posted on 03/08/2009 8:21:05 AM PDT by em2vn
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: tlb
Here's a link to her booking photo.

Here

Guilty!

13 posted on 03/08/2009 8:27:31 AM PDT by csvset
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: csvset

Guilty? But,,, she’s a massage therapist!


14 posted on 03/08/2009 8:29:42 AM PDT by Dr. Bogus Pachysandra ( Ya can't pick up a turd by the clean end!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 13 | View Replies]

To: Dr. Bogus Pachysandra
Leonard has a Web page that says she is a massage therapist who recently graduated from a massage center in Weaverville, N.C. On her Web page, she says, “My private office is tucked away in a serene valley surrounded by an amazing mountain-scape. My loving energy and slow flowing technique provide a truly outstanding relaxation massage.”

Yeah, baby! Give me your love, slow flow style.

15 posted on 03/08/2009 8:34:55 AM PDT by csvset
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies]

To: tlb

Man, if we haven’t gotem we’ll go and getem.


16 posted on 03/08/2009 8:51:11 AM PDT by Rappini ("Pro deo et Patria.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: csvset; Tijeras_Slim

Nobody looks good in a mug shot. I’d hit it.


17 posted on 03/08/2009 9:17:00 AM PDT by CholeraJoe (Tagline removed under court order)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 13 | View Replies]

To: upchuck; SC Swamp Fox

SC ping!


18 posted on 03/08/2009 9:21:59 AM PDT by Slings and Arrows ("I HOPE you like your CHANGE."--MrB)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: tlb; MeekOneGOP; Conspiracy Guy; DocRock; King Prout; Darksheare; OSHA; martin_fierro; ...
This idiot is lucky she didn't get shot with +3 Bullets of Species Improvement.


19 posted on 03/08/2009 9:23:56 AM PDT by Slings and Arrows ("I HOPE you like your CHANGE."--MrB)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: tlb

http://www.blogcatalog.com/search.frame.php?term=nicole+marie-loretta+leonard&id=dfd98655dc7f55b9afede784e51c1ed1

Anyone near Candler, NC up for a massage from the fairy lady?


20 posted on 03/08/2009 9:26:09 AM PDT by rollo tomasi (Working hard to pay for deadbeats and corrupt politicians.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Slings and Arrows; 2A Patriot; 2nd amendment mama; 4everontheRight; 77Jimmy; ...
South Carolina Ping

Add me to the list. / Remove me from the list.
21 posted on 03/08/2009 9:30:33 AM PDT by upchuck (I'm glad I'm old. Thus I can remember when America was a decent, moral, God fearing country.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 18 | View Replies]

To: bgill
She figured if her magic could give us a President who shouldn't be in office that she could raise the dead. I guess she found out that it doesn't work every time.
22 posted on 03/08/2009 9:35:37 AM PDT by Hillarys Gate Cult (The man who said "there's no such thing as a stupid question" has never talked to Helen Thomas.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: tlb
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Wv17MAgnCfk

Just another example of the new ecumenicalism.

23 posted on 03/08/2009 9:35:54 AM PDT by Slings and Arrows ("I HOPE you like your CHANGE."--MrB)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: rollo tomasi

lol!

Sounds like a metaphor for B-HO’s stimulous plan, followed up way down the road with ‘’seemed like the right thing to do at the time!’’


24 posted on 03/08/2009 9:38:31 AM PDT by LittleBillyInfidel (I know a few A-HOs... and guess what? They voted for B-HO!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 20 | View Replies]

To: Tijeras_Slim

I read this on one of the gossip blogs early in the week. I can’t believe they just let her go and do her little dance and no one stopped her.


25 posted on 03/08/2009 9:44:49 AM PDT by retrokitten (Humor is merely tragedy standing on its head with its pants torn. Irvin S. Cobb)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: tlb
It, says she, “felt it was the right thing to do at the time.”

The defense I would invoke when I, as a grieving relative, kicked her demented butt.

26 posted on 03/08/2009 9:53:31 AM PDT by IronJack (=)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Slings and Arrows

Definitely one of those loony democrats.

Obama thinks his wand is magic.


27 posted on 03/08/2009 10:04:13 AM PDT by Lady Jag (America, Land of the Free; Home of the Brave. Everyone else get out.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 19 | View Replies]

To: Lady Jag
Obama thinks his wand is magic.

That sounds more like Bill Clinton.

28 posted on 03/08/2009 10:06:32 AM PDT by Slings and Arrows ("I HOPE you like your CHANGE."--MrB)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 27 | View Replies]

To: Slings and Arrows; KC_Conspirator
She would have needed a potion for hot lead.
29 posted on 03/08/2009 10:08:18 AM PDT by SC Swamp Fox (Aim small, miss small.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 19 | View Replies]

To: 75thOVI; Abathar; alarm rider; albee; Alice au Wonderland; Amityschild; aMorePerfectUnion; ...

No amateurs, please.
Send FReepmail if you want on/off ISHP list
The List of Ping Lists

Moderately Not Guilty.

Mildly crooked eyes are hot.

30 posted on 03/08/2009 10:08:25 AM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: martin_fierro

I’d hit it.


31 posted on 03/08/2009 10:11:16 AM PDT by Lazamataz ("We beat the Soviet Union, then we became them." -- Lazamataz, 2005)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 30 | View Replies]

To: Tijeras_Slim; retrokitten; CholeraJoe; Tax-chick
One of the other tenants in the tri-plex we last lived in -- landlord's daughter -- made wands as a hobby*.

Poor, lonely little mousy thing.

Our nickname for her was ... Wanda.
-----
* Presumably for sale at flea markets, but who knows.

32 posted on 03/08/2009 10:14:24 AM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz

It’s that cockeyed look that gets me going.


33 posted on 03/08/2009 10:15:00 AM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 31 | View Replies]

To: Lazamataz; martin_fierro
Id’ve hit it repeatedly, about the head & shoulders.

She would have had rugburns on her face from being dragged back out into the street.
34 posted on 03/08/2009 10:22:33 AM PDT by BraveMan
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 31 | View Replies]

To: SC Swamp Fox

Now that’s LARPing!


35 posted on 03/08/2009 10:44:38 AM PDT by Slings and Arrows ("I HOPE you like your CHANGE."--MrB)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 29 | View Replies]

To: martin_fierro
I would have to consider additional evidence before passing judgment.

How much beer is in the jury room?

36 posted on 03/08/2009 10:56:17 AM PDT by SC Swamp Fox (Aim small, miss small.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 30 | View Replies]

To: SC Swamp Fox

Kegger in here, dude.


37 posted on 03/08/2009 11:00:07 AM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 36 | View Replies]

To: martin_fierro

Anoreth made wands for a while, a couple of years ago. She gave some to her friends and sold a few to other kids in the neighborhood.


38 posted on 03/08/2009 12:22:09 PM PDT by Tax-chick ("There are more enjoyable ways of going to Hell." ~ St. Bernard)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 32 | View Replies]

To: Slings and Arrows; All
Sunday School
39 posted on 03/08/2009 12:35:46 PM PDT by Stoat (Palin / Coulter 2012: A Strong America Through Unapologetic Conservatism)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 19 | View Replies]

To: Stoat

Oh my freakin word, that is HYSTERICAL!


40 posted on 03/08/2009 2:33:04 PM PDT by Titan Magroyne ("Drill now drill hard drill often and give old Gaia a cigarette afterwards she deserves it." HerrBlu)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 39 | View Replies]

To: tlb
For the next few years I used my knowledge and ability to help those around me by offering free massage therapy on an unprofessional level.

I bet you did. And still do.

41 posted on 03/08/2009 3:07:55 PM PDT by dfwddr (A warning to people from Nigeria; if you get an email from Washington asking for money, it's a scam.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: martin_fierro

It seems that crooked eyes are seen most often on liberals?


42 posted on 03/08/2009 3:25:17 PM PDT by tflabo
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 30 | View Replies]

To: tflabo

I think you're right.

43 posted on 03/08/2009 6:32:42 PM PDT by Free Vulcan (No prisoners. No mercy. 2010 awaits.....)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 42 | View Replies]

To: Dr. Bogus Pachysandra

AWWW! NO..Happy Ending in this story! LOL


44 posted on 03/10/2009 10:30:27 AM PDT by jakerobins
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies]

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson