Posted on 03/29/2009 5:22:04 PM PDT by LibWhacker
THE Melbourne Catholic Church has embraced a Vatican recommendation to test potential priests for sexual orientation.
Under the guidelines, potential priests who "appear" to be gay must be banned.
The head of the Vatican committee that made the recommendations has made it clear celibate gays should also be banned because homosexuality is ‘‘a type of deviation’’.
Archdiocese of Melbourne spokesman James O’Farrell confirmed Carlton’s Corpus Christi Catholic seminary had started adhering to the guidelines, but refused to comment further.
(Excerpt) Read more at news.com.au ...
ping
1. Ask them what ERA stands for, if they say Equal Rights Ammendment they are gay
That’s classic, and much needed. Fruits were at the core of the child molestation scandals. Seriously, how many young GIRLS did you ever read about having been molested? ANY?
Journalists!
Melbourne Catholic Church embraces testing to ID gay priests
Roman Catholic Church in Melbourne embraces testing to ID gay priests.
Fixed it!
Seminarians in the USA already undergo several rounds of testing, among them theologocal and psychological.
A lot more screening is going on everywhere in the Catholic Church. Not just in Australia.
How on earth are they going to “test” for gay priests? Show them pictures of naked men and see if they get a “response”?
Sounds like a winner to me. LOL.
Libs love those scandals. Loved to criticize the Church for them. Now they’re howling about the testing, lol. Heads we win, tails you lose.
Or, I’m guessing, show them pics of beautiful women and look at the neurological response only.
Ya think?
Who knew!
You Know You're Gay When...
1. You wear the appropriate underwear for each of your dates.
2. You understand the subtle differences between at least 20 brands of vodka.
3. You understand the immense importance of good (or bad) lighting.
4. You can be in a crowded bar and still spot a toupee from 50 yards away.
5. You can tell a woman you love her bathing suit and mean her bathing suit.
6. You can tell a woman she has lipstick on her teeth without embarrassing her.
7. No one expects you to kiss and not tell.
8. You can have naked pictures of men you know in your home.
9. You can have naked pictures of men you don't know in your home.
10. You can have naked pictures of men you don't know in your home and on your computer.
11. Unlike your women friends, you can hang out in men's locker room.
12. You understand why the good Lord created spandex.
13. You understand why the good Lord did not intend everyone to wear spandex.
14. You know the difference between a latte, cappuccino, cafe au lait and a macchiato. And if you don't, you know how to fake it.
15. You know how to get back at just about everyone.
16. Your pets always have great names.
17. Nobody expects you to change a tire.
18. You're the only guy who gets to do the "Cosmo" quizzes.
19. You know how to get a waiter's attention.
20. You only wear polyester when you mean to.
21. At any given instant, you can recite who was gay since the dawn of history.
22. You are, hands down, your nephew's and nieces' favorite uncle.
23. You get to choose your family.
24. You can tell your sexual compatibility with a potential partner by the way he holds his drink.
25. You can smile to let someone know you can't stand them.
26. You wouldn't be caught dead in Hooters.
27. You can freeze an approaching bar troll twenty feet away.
28. You're good pals with women other people can't stand.
29. You've always got an opinion, and don't mind sharing it.
30. You've read the book, seen the movie, done the musical.
31. You know how to "air kiss".
32. You know exactly which cosmetic surgery to consider having... and the perfect excuse to give people who ask where you've been for two weeks.
33. You know how to dress strategically.
34. You know when to move out and move on.
35. You are the only one at the class reunion who looks better than you did in high school.
36. You've got at least one framed picture of a pet.
37. You know that being called a "cheap slut" isn't necessarily an insult.
38. You wouldn't buy someone a mug for their birthday.
39. You know which wine to bring.
40. Sales clerks don't mess with you.
41. You have a medicine chest stocked for any occasion.
42. You never hold a grudge for longer than a decade.
43. You've just about defeated the accent you were born with.
44. You know the way to a man's heart is not necessarily through his stomach.
45. You choose the most fabulous greeting cards.
46. You know every film ever made with male frontal nudity.
47. You've got sunscreen at every conceivable SPF level.
48. You have the latest International Male catalog.
49. You wouldn't dream of dressing out of the latest International Male catalog.
50. You can be bitchy without anyone blaming it on biology.
Why do I feel this is gonna be an upcoming episode of the ‘Simpsons?’
I may be wrong, but isn’t this one of the kinds of testing seminaries routinely did (along with psychological testing) into the late 50’s/early 60’s until urged by psychologists of the 60’s and others to drop it? Testing administered to make sure potential candidates were suitable in many ways for the future vocations. Seems like a good idea.
Well, when you are attracted to someone with the same plumbing, your gay and if they can weed out those molesting young boys - isn’t it worth it if it protects just one child?
Ironically, the old joke about the priests with bells tied around their members may have a point. But this could be done electronically.
There are five areas of the brain that show increased function during sexual arousal. Importantly, these are different if someone is right handed or left handed (ignore the obvious implication).
So a cap with sensors on it could be placed on the head, then a series of short movies could be shown that would act as controls, or experiments to determine what created sexual arousal in the priest.
In the classical experiment of this, the subject was first shown a short geography travelogue, with a neutral theme. In this case, it could be followed up with several films that would not only determine what was sexually stimulating and what was not, but to what degree it was sexually stimulating.
Other control films would likewise be included, for example showing scenes of violence, like a boxing match, gambling, drinking liquor or doing drugs. Films of children would also be a good idea.
In the case of priests, it would be very valuable to know their reaction to all sorts of things: films of Muslims, Jews and Pagans, an abortion, women and children in high risk situations, scenes of war and conflict, etc.
More than anything else, if a priest has a weird response to something, it would probably be good to talk with him about it, first.
OMG I can’t believe you posted this...now ALL the Catholics will join the Mormons in trying to destroy FR...ROFL.
Actually very interesting post thanks. Hope you didn’t mind my slight indulgence regarding the Mormon drama unfolding...
Gay priests are very very expensive..
“Seriously, how many young GIRLS did you ever read about having been molested? ANY?”
Plenty. It just gets hushed up.
Sadly, it happened.
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