Woman getting married to fairground ride

Telegraph UK ^ | 05 Aug 2009 | Sasjkia Otto

[COUNTrecount]

This follows a "courtship" of 3,000 rides over ten years with the 80ft gondola ride called 1001 Nachts.

Miss Wolfe, 33, from Pennsylvania, will change her surname to Weber after the manufacturer of the ride she travels 160 miles to visit 10 times per year, according to reports

“I love him as much as women love their husbands and know we’ll be together forever,” she said.

Miss Wolfe first fell for the ride when she was 13: “I was instantly attracted to him sexually and mentally.

“I wasn’t freaked out, as it just felt so natural, but I didn’t tell anyone about it because I knew it wasn’t ‘normal’ to have feelings for a fairground ride.”

Ten years later, she decided to go back to Knoebels Amusement Park to declare her love. She now sleeps with a picture of the ride on her ceiling and carries its spare nuts and bolts around to feel closer to it.

She claims to believe they share a fulfilling physical and spiritual relationship and does not get jealous when other people ride it.

[COUNTrecount]

Amy Wolfe will change her surname to Weber.

I report, you decide.

[nickcarraway]

He’ll only break your heart. He’s seeing other people.

[Daniel II]

Just what lover has spare nuts to give up?

[apillar]

Well it's a good thing she lives in the UK, because she would definitely have been an Obama voter.

[COUNTrecount]

He’s lso seating other people.

[COUNTrecount]

She’s from Pennsylvania.

[autumnraine]

Him? By the looks of her, this amusement park ride is most certainly female.

[autumnraine]

She doesn’t live in the UK, this was reported in the UK.

[nickcarraway]

Ewww, she’s a lesbian?

[nmh]

ANother Obama voter:

Excerpt:

“I love him as much as women love their husbands and know we’ll be together forever,” she said.

Miss Wolfe first fell for the ride when she was 13: “I was instantly attracted to him sexually and mentally.

“I wasn’t freaked out, as it just felt so natural, but I didn’t tell anyone about it because I knew it wasn’t ‘normal’ to have feelings for a fairground ride.”

Ten years later, she decided to go back to Knoebels Amusement Park to declare her love. She now sleeps with a picture of the ride on her ceiling and carries its spare nuts and bolts around to feel closer to it.

She claims to believe they share a fulfilling physical and spiritual relationship and does not get jealous when other people ride it.

...

How LIBERALtarian of her:

Although she faces discrimination from employers, most of her family and friends have been supportive. “I’m not hurting anyone and I can’t help it,” she said. “It’s a part of who I am.”

[csvset]

I just had to click on this thread. A glutton for punishment.

[The Magical Mischief Tour]

[Lockbar]

You will notice nobody is seated around her. More trouble in Penn.

[mikey_hates_everything]

What benefits will she now demand for the fairground ride?

[SIDENET]

Damn, dude.

[wxgesr]

No, I wouldn’t.

[Zeppo]

And her washing machine is sooooo disappointed...

[RandallFlagg]

I remember telling people that the legalization of gay marriages would lead to people marrying inaminate objects. They thought I was just being homophobic and stupid.

Well......

[Charles Henrickson]

10 times per year

Sounds like she's ready for married life.

[SIDENET]

Someone needs to tell her that the roller coaster is just using her.

[steveo]

I thought it would’ve been a Footsie Wootsie machine.

[BradyLS]

Oh, well. At least she isn’t killing folks over not having a man. Or whatever.

[isom35]

who is that dude?

[BradyLS]

Someone needs to tell her that the roller coaster is just using her.

True. But how long before she demands that no one can charge her to "ride" her "husband."

[chemicalman]

Hate to bust your bubble Mr...um Mrs Wolfe...but you’re not the only one that is getting a thrill out that ride.

[Lizavetta]

10 times per year

Sounds like she's ready for married life.

Not my husband's.

[Jeff Chandler]

Could have been worse.

[martin_fierro]

carries its spare nuts and bolts around

That typically doesn't happen until after the divorce.

[martin_fierro]

The Groom.

[ApplegateRanch]

Ding-a-ling ping!

[ApplegateRanch]

Is it even legal to "ride" (or be ridden by) your husband in public in Pennsylvania?

William Pemm must be rolling in his grave.

If we could harness all the graveyard spinning going on in this country, thanks to Libs, there wouldn't be an 'energy crisis'.

[Slings and Arrows]

[Yaelle]

Aw, poor thing. This is a symptom of autism. I am glad she is happy.

[mikrofon]

and bolts around to feel closer to it

Bolting around the room carrying the spouse's nuts sounds like some kind of a weird ritual...

[Stoat]

Amy Wolfe, a US church organist

What church?  Is her organ jealous?

Oh, the questions that I really don't want to have answered.....

[ApplegateRanch]

National Locksmith Insurance would prevent these kinds of accidents, when combined with Universal Cellphone Implantation.

I hope he learned to always use the YELLOW extension cord in the future; the orange ones are only medium weight; the green ones are light weight; the yellow are OSHA certified. ;-)

[ApplegateRanch]

Oops; wrong thread! Sorry.

[Fishtalk]

I am not making this up....please read the fiction story I wrote at the post below...

Am I omniscient or what?

http://fishfiction.blogspot.com/2009/01/71909.html

[PureSolace]

Ouch! ZING!

[COUNTrecount]

LOLOLOL!!!!!!!!!!

[COUNTrecount]

Woman getting married to fairground ride
Amy Wolfe, a US church organist who claims to have objectum sexuality, a condition that makes sufferers attracted to inanimate objects, plans to marry a magic carpet fairground ride.

This condition is a symptom of autism?

[vrwc54]

Amy might be guilty of rape. How old is the roller coaster and has it given it’s consent?

[COUNTrecount]

Disney Land must be alerted.

[COUNTrecount]

LOL!!!

[Shimmer1]

Even I, as a woman, has to say GUILTY. omg, SO guilty.

[P.O.E.]

Knoebel’s is an awesome old-fashioned park. They’re very family-friendly, good prices, a selection of rides for all ages and tastes, and the best funnel cake.

[Freedom_Is_Not_Free]

Great, another fruitcake guaranteed to get her own reality TV show.

[null and void]

What tangled Webers we weave...

[COUNTrecount]

Sounds like a great place to meet your soulmate ride.

[COUNTrecount]

Only if she gives birth to octo-magic-carpet rides.