Skip to comments.Why Jerks Exist
Posted on 08/29/2009 6:50:30 PM PDT by grundle
Subject: Why Jerks Exist
Why Jerks Exist
I teach high school and am getting ready for another year. I have had the pleasure of listening to you over the summer, and have been a listener for over ten years.
I do my fair share of step-parenting to many kids that seek my advice. There are days I'm hosting my own version of the Dr. Laura show when kids come in at lunch time or after school to discuss dating and parent dilemmas. I have a particular niche with high school girls with a poor or no dad. I have discovered how crucial it is for girls to have a non-romantic strong man in their life that cares about them. I'm glad I can fill in some voids, but I'm often quite saddened that a student has to rely on their math teacher for advice that should be coming from their dad. After years of counseling hundreds of girls on the dating scene, I came up with a line last year that was definitely shaped by the years of listening to your show. After hearing another pathetic story about a nice girl dating the bad boy, I exclaimed in class one day, "Ladies, do you know the ONLY reason jerks exist? Because there is always some girl willing to date him! Women have all the power to control male behavior. If you would all stick together and stop dating the jerks, you would be amazed at what an endangered species jerks would be!" After I stopped channeling you, it was back to a fascinating lecture on trigonometry. Thanks for all the great advice I have passed on to many students over the years. You have made me look far wiser than I actually am. Now back to saving the world, one teenager at a time.
“Oh Yeah? Well the Jerk Store called, they’re out of you!” /seinfeld
Well, somebody has to vote Democrat!
Excellent advice. Too many women act as enablers for bad male behavior.
This is all such BS. Just more attacking the “white male”. Such crap.
As the front, so the back. Females of any age who pick male jerks, pick them because they get along - i.e., because they’re female jerks.
I laugh when I see how much effort goes into denying this simple, obvious, inescapable fact.
Uh, jerks come in all colors. I think the point of the letter is not rewarding bad behavior.
One woman’s jerk is another woman’s red-blooded American male.
Kind of a jerky remark there....
Why Jerks Exist
Thought this was a fishing story...
Yep. Ladies love outlaws.
parsy, who has the Outlaw Book Of Poetry, and wonders why that doesn’t work
Jerks Unite! Stop Jerk Bashing Today!
This isn't rocket science. A little self-respect on the part of young women and a few simple biology lessons about the male species goes a long way.
I taught my daughter what my grandmother taught me and believe me, there is a lot to be said for the societal rules that existed a hundred years ago.
Yikes! I think you just equated white males and jerks.
There are no black jerks, right? ;-)
I’ll have to check that one out, it sounds interesting.
Anybody seen those youthful pics of the good doc?
The sad fact is that much of the mainstream dating advice given to young men doesn't work these days ('be nice', 'be courteous', 'be a gentleman'). Women tend to view this as wimpy behavior.
Well, it goes both ways. It’s an offer and demand issue. Many men tend to spoil unworthy women to the extreme, making all women expect more so out of a man than her girlfriend is already getting.
It is glaringly obvious that the “price” of overhyped gals and girls goes way up when men become so easy customers. Sadly this translates into so called “moderate men” and their tolerance for abortion, along with courthouses making crazy demands of living standards.
Few years back cell phones were not existent, but now it’s like part of divorce settlements: a cell phone service must be provided.
Our modern society has become completely absurd. It’s why it expects now to make a living without Carbon dioxide emissions.
As for women choosing jerks and other gross spitters, I will surmise that one must be a jerk to compromise on abortion with a b!tch... 2 peas in a pod.
Black jerks? Oh, you don’t mean those who use their own self-hated color of skin to thrust it distastefuly at others in their faces, as a test, liking to call themselves by the N word even - and persecuting even more so other blacks with it as a “private” right?
In addition, by being around jerks and bad boys, women can adapt the moral posturing of vocally condemning what they secretly enjoy. They tsk tsk men while winking their approval. Women then use their moral posturing to "win" arguments, only they find the jerks and the bad boys don't really care if they lose arguments - they'll just do as they please anyway. Some women are turned on even more when they are mistreated, odd as that seems.
I think many women see themselves as lion tamers trying to tame the foul beast that is man. They see no need to seek lions who are already tame so they must fight over the untamed so as to justify their rightful place in a civil society.
So, in short, girls and women are never going to agree to stop being attracted to jerks and bad boys because those are the sort of guys that provide the excitement they crave and allow them to establish themselves as morally superior, which then increases their self-esteem.
So, Dr. Laura and others, it's never going to happen because women don't want it to happen. Who wants a bunch of boring, polite, civil men? Certainly not most women in the 15-35 age group.
Uhhh, not for nothin’ as they used to say in my neighborhood but jerks also come in the female of the species as well.
Fully 50% of the population, both male and female has an IQ lower than 100. Solution? Give IQ tests and sterilize those that fall under 100. These idiots get to vote, drive cars, move next door to you and worse of all they breathe...
So nothing has changed in 50 years, and so there is nothing to change back?
Did you think that she is looking for 100% compliance with every female?
A good majority of jerks are “infiltrating” abusive con artists, ie. eg.
Boy meets girl; happy girl starts talking; jerk “jokingly” makes fun of her facial hair that she does not have; she responds and giggles, and now she is stuck and caught.
It’s all in the entrapment game. The men who let her free often lose her in her dreaminess, and she thinks of them as the tree of Eden, a provider to violate, not a leader who leads. It’s also all in the rhythm of conversations, much like a hunting dog will respect the jogger of the family but not grandma’s calls to heel.
The sad fact is that much of the mainstream dating advice given to young men doesn’t work these days (’be nice’, ‘be courteous’, ‘be a gentleman’). Women tend to view this as wimpy behavior.
Thus women seem to fall for lines like:
I’m Mr Sleaze
I’m what you want and I’m what you need.
The above I made up as a parody, however it is so close to the mark it is scary. An acqaintance of mine (socially and professionally) fell for such a line (the jerk is a VP at a Fortune 500), and is now stuck with a control freak. I can;t call her a friend, since she is not allowed to have friends.
This is a extremely unhealthy dynamic. When you let someone walk all over you, they lose all respect for you. But pampering women, showering them with gifts and putting them on a pedestal is still what much of mainstream society tells men to do. Reciprocity is the key thing in any human relationship. Men should expect no less.
IQ is not fixed, however. Some do grow up and others grow down or even drag down, no matter their IQ. Across time the overall IQ of today might be lower or higher, as there is such a thing as cursed generations too.
Jerks and language selection is more at issue. Common sense would be more accurate in checking on desirability.
That one make me laugh every time.
L O L !
You hit the nail on the head. I just hope young men realize these facts of life early on.
I think she's smarter than that but this teacher/letter-writer may not be.
For centuries older women have tsk tsked what they see younger women doing even though many of them did the same thing when they were younger.
I don't think that's ever going to change.
It almost sounds like I'm endorsing male jerkness, which is 100% against my natural inclination. I'm just saying this is my personal theory on why women are so contradictory to what they claim to want. They want you to find their inner "bad girl" and the only way to get there is to behave even worse so they can keep up the illusion of being "good".
Male jerks exist because female jerks seek them out to date. Birds of a feather and all.
I think that everyone is, this was simply about adjusting an imbalance that has cropped up in the last couple of generations.
Another thing which relates to this dynamic is that many males are nowadays afraid to express their sexuality to women in a healthy way. Anything can be made into harassment these days. Yet, like you say, women expect their sexual partners to be 'bad'.
I've only come along 1 jerk during my dating days and he was a real loser, for sure. He was ok at first and then my parents told me to end the friendship because I was becoming to distracted. (I was in high school.) I wasn't happy but reluctantly broke it off. The following 18 months was hell involving stalking, slashed tires, vandalism, harassing phone calls, threat with a switchblade....
Some people are nice until you tell them, "no."
Never leave the house without a large hat pin?
Women are the fools that let jerks abound...We always had the power, but the younger generation didn't know that...Men were gentlemen for a reason, if they weren't the gals didn't give them the time of day..
I hate to say it but females are the problem...and the mess will continue until they wake up... Goat Granny (female that had a great husband)
If I were a guy, with some of todays females, I think I would become a hermit. Guys get screwed all around, especially in the court system with divorce. Scripture says better to live in the corner of an attic than with a troublesome woman...(I think that is in proverbs.)
it’s never going to happen because women don’t want it to happen. Who wants a bunch of boring, polite, civil men? Certainly not most women in the 15-35 age group.
***Nice guys finish last.
“Now back to saving the world, one teenager at a time.”
The guy’s point might be well taken, but that’s a pretty self-aggrandizing sign off. I wonder if this letter is real.