Skip to comments.So much for packing a, um, rod
Posted on 09/11/2009 12:31:30 PM PDT by ConservativeStatement
It's a lesson he should have learned from Plaxico Burress -- but this was worse.
A 15-year-old Brooklyn boy shot himself in the penis Sunday after fumbling with a gun that had slid from his waistband, authorities said yesterday.
Khamir Grant was then arrested for reckless endangerment and criminal possession of a weapon -- the same charges levied against Burress, who shot himself at a Manhattan nightclub in 2008, law-enforcement sources said.
(Excerpt) Read more at nypost.com ...
It's looking like a bad day for penises.
(On the bright side, though, we may just see that rarest of creatures - a living Darwin Award nominee.)
“I really wish stories like this would say exactly what kind of gun the imbecile shot himself with. Every time I hear one of these, I can’t for the life of me understand how they manage this.”
Probably a Jennings “nine”...and I can see how it would be hard to carry a pistol around in your pants when you probably can’t even hold your baggy pants up...
—he’ll probably sue the manufacturer—(I’m serious)-—
..just a guess.
That is an unfortunate requirement, because it is not accurate.
Effectively, any dumb act that prevents a person from reproducing should qualify.
And here's another twist - even if dead, the person must have died before reproducing.
and since all firearms are always loaded...
I guess the wasteband doesn’t make for a good holster.
No, the candidate must be unable to reproduce. This usually means dead, but this case may be a rare exception. (I say may be because we don't know if it was restored to full functionality.)
Yes, that twist is correct. The award goes to someone who has died as a result of their nominating action and has done so before reproducing, thus removing their genes from the gene pool and thereby becoming extinct.
I would bet a glock.
He’ll spend the rest of his life concealing a dead weapon.
So how are the Darwin Awards actually determined?
Nominees significantly improve the gene pool by eliminating themselves from the human race in an obviously stupid way. They are self-selected examples of the dangers inherent in a lack of common sense, and all human races, cultures, and socioeconomic groups are eligible to compete. Actual winners must meet the following criteria:
Out of the gene pool: dead or sterile.
Astounding misapplication of judgment.
Cause one’s own demise.
Capable of sound judgment.
The event must be true.
* Whizzing on an electric wire
* Smoking in an oxygen tent
* Being hit by a train or automobile
* Aerosol cans, etc., in the oven
* Climbing into zoo cages
* Falling off precipice while posing or pissing
* Carbon monoxide poisoning
* Most autoerotic deaths
* all too common!
Killing others: The death of innocent bystanders absolutely rules out a Darwin Award. We don’t applaud those who take others out of the gene pool, even if they share some DNA in common.
Answers any and all questions I have.
Pecker plinking pistol ping.....
For the life of me, I’ve never understood what possesses someone to carry a gun around that way. What’s the worst that can happen? I guess this dude found out the hard way. Ouch!
There it is. Death is not a requirement.
Did this leave him brain dead?
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