Stop Alien Abductions for under $30.00

STOP ALIEN ABDUCTIONS ^

[Scythian]

ALIEN ABDUCTEE FROM AUSTRIA WEARING A THOUGHT SCREEN HELMET SHE MADE FROM DIRECTIONS ON THIS WEB SITE.

"I have been abducted by aliens for years and found stopabductions.com by a happy coincidence.

The Thought Screen Helmet, invented by an expert, has stopped the unwelcome visitations and has raised me and my family`s quality of life. Therefore I highly recommend it."

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IF YOU ARE ABDUCTED BY ALIENS THE HELMET WILL WORK FOR YOU

[Scythian]

Learn how to build yours HERE

[mountainlion]

A tin foil hat will work also.

[SaraJohnson]

What a deal! And what a cute model.

[dirtboy]

Can I join whatever clinical trials you happen to be participating in? It’s gotta be better than beer.

[OSHA]

Not guilty!

[the long march]

Duuuuude!

[Scythian]

From their site ... I love this reasoning ...

Aliens will try to stop you from wearing the helmet both mentally and physically. Remember that they can read your mind. Before you make one they may try to influence you that you don’t need one. Once you start wearing a helmet they may harass you or perhaps threaten to kill a pet in retaliation. They are good at manipulating your spouse to have a conflict with you about wearing the helmet. If you forget to wear it one time they may physically hurt you. They have done these things to a minority of abductees wearing helmets. Most abductees report complete success with the helmet when they wear it as much as they can.

[GeronL]

lol.

I hope someone paid her for that.

[posterchild]

What if I only want to reduce the frequency of abductions?

[dirtboy]

[eCSMaster]

It works! Really!

I’ve been wearing mine for 25 years and I have NEVER been abducted by aliens!

$30 - a bargain at half the price!

[Scythian]

A tin foil hat will work also

Tin Foil is so 90's man, today the cool kids use the "Velostat protective lining" ... Get with it man !!

[evets]

[handy old one]

They forgot to cover the eyes, the direct line to the soul as anyone knows if you can’t see the eyes you can’t read the soul.

[Red Badger]

I don’t want to abduct any aliens...................

[WayneS]

Those things do not work worth a crap...

...and now I’m out 30 bucks!

[Smokin' Joe]

Cute, but does it stop the ubiquitous anal probe?

Alien? He said he was a proctologist!

[calico_thompson]

There’s gonna be a short squeeze on “The Bullwinkle Hat.” Better get in fast before the market soars.

Leather Hat
The hat shown, a leather aviator’s hat, also known by Motorcyclists as a “Rocky Bullwinkle Hat”, is manufactured by Henschel Hat Company, Part number 7471-60. This hat, and a similar model, part number 7471-41, are available at some motorcycle stores. The helmet also comes in size small/medium for small children. Similar leather hats are available from the suppliers listed below.

[Wiz]

TIN FOIL HATS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[dirtboy]

Did you know Billy Mays was a alien? He didn’t die, he was just called back to the Mother Ship for recharging.

[stockpirate]

I want to be abducted by her.

[Smokin' Joe]

A true ‘brain bucket’!

[Dallas]

BUT,....is she protected from moose bites?

[mountainlion]

I think I might go retro with a Viet Nam era steel pot. The old door screen would pull too much hair.

[ConservativeMan55]

ping

[Scythian]

November, 1999

Woman who reported abduction experiences as the type described by David Jacobs and Bud Hopkins. She said the alien brought her to orgasm by mental suggestion. It looked like the type of insect like alien reported in The Threat. She reports complete success and has been wearing a helmet 24 hours a day for a year and a half. Her husband says she even bathes with it on. This woman was extremely traumatized by her abduction experience. Her husband had her hospitalized for several months when she insisted she was abducted. After wearing the helmet for several months she said she became much more stable and focused.

November, 2000

A leather helmet using 14 sheets of metalized plastic was sent to replace her old helmet which was becoming worn out.

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Now I know why my wife wears that funny hat and always has a headache, it makes perfect sense now ...

[ZX12R]

"I have been abducted by aliens for years and found stopabductions.com by a happy coincidence."

I feel so sorry for some people. She is cute though.

[This_far]

Aliens will try to stop you from wearing the helmet both mentally and physically.

Yes, that is sooooooo simpler than stopping you from writing a check.

[DeFault User]

The thought screen helmet has effectively stopped several types of aliens from abducting or controlling humans. Only four failures have been reported since 1998.

Two of those failures were encounters with alien-human hybrids. In 2005, a cloth helmet with a smaller area of Velostat, which had a Velcro strap, was easily removed by an alien-human hybrid. Another failure occurred in 2007 when two alien-human hybrids snuck up behind a frail woman, tackled her, and forcedly removed her helmet. These alien-human hybrids are described in The Threat by David Jacobs and in Sight Unseen by Budd Hopkins.

The helmet still works for people being abducted by aliens, but not by their alien-human hybrids who are now integrating into our societies.

Since my problem is with alien-human hybrids, I shall defer the purchase until the inventor has the kinks worked out.

[mnehring]

What color did you make yours?

[Billthedrill]

Why wouldn’t I want insectoid human-alien hybrids giving me orgasms by mental suggestion? I’ve had worse dates. Lots worse.

[theDentist]

Seems to me that if Aliens can come all this way to abduct someone, using a space ship that can fold the space time continuum and travel many parsecs in only moments, won’t they have intellect enough to take the helmet off?

[Vasilli22]

bfl

[Vasilli22]

[TChris]

He is an impressive guitarist, but nuttier than trail mix.

[Army Air Corps]

I wouldn’t mind being abducted by her...

[ShadowAce]

How (and why) did you find this site?

[Scythian]

I modled mind after the leather football helmet worn by Jack Nicholson in easy rider ... They keep getting the chin strap off though, I'm so sick of the probing ...

[dfwgator]

Speaking of "Easy Rider"

Dennis Hopper in Critical Condition (Heart Attack)

[thackney]

Really important info ping

[Scythian]

How (and why) did you find this site?

A friend sent it to me over MSN Messenger to make me crack-up ...

[Quix]

hmmmmmm

[freedomlover]

“Seems to me that if Aliens can come all this way to abduct someone, using a space ship that can fold the space time continuum and travel many parsecs in only moments, won’t they have intellect enough to take the helmet off?”

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Looks like you can strike off Hollywood screenwriting off your list of potential jobs.

[Jean S]

This could become a classic. I can’t stop laughing!

[dirtboy]

Her husband says she even bathes with it on.

Her hair must look and smell like week-old roadkill.

[theDentist]

DRAT!!!

[Hacklehead]

These helmets are useful in that they allow the instant identification of insane people.

[Scythian]

He is an impressive guitarist, but nuttier than trail mix.

Even Guns and Roses found him to eccentric, now that's sayin' something ...

[TChris]

Even Guns and Roses found him to eccentric, now that's sayin' something ...

I read that Ozzy once wanted to hire him, if he would just lose the bucket.

No deal.

(Glad we got Zakk instead, though.)