Posted on 10/29/2009 1:31:45 PM PDT by MinorityRepublican
(CNN) -- If you were to judge the success rate of monogamy by the sex lives of public figures, perhaps couples should change their marriage vows to say, "Till a tempting new partner do us part."
Talk-show host David Letterman recently joined former presidential candidate John Edwards, South Carolina Gov. Mark Sanford and former New York Gov. Eliot Spitzer on a long list of politicians and entertainers (think Jude Law) who have admitted having sex outside their marriage or committed relationship.
But do they just illustrate the realities of modern life?
In the age of hookups, friends with benefits and online dating, and as human life expectancy grows, is it still reasonable to expect people to pair up and stay monogamous until death do them part?
"It's realistic that some people can mate for life in the same sense that some people can play the Beethoven violin concerto or other people can ice-skate beautifully or learn a new language," said psychiatrist Judith Eve Lipton.
Added evolutionary biologist David Barash, "It's within the realm of human potential, but it's not easy."
Lipton and Barash, who have been married 32 years and are the co-authors of "Strange Bedfellows" and "The Myth of Monogamy," said serial monogamy may be more realistic -- a model in which people move from one committed long-term relationship to another and choose partners for different reasons at different stages of their life.
(Excerpt) Read more at cnn.com ...
I’ll try to live Issac’s example, thanks.
To effect Communism, you must first destroy the Family.
“It’s within the realm of human potential, but it’s not easy.”
As opposed to the constant risk of STDs, endless comparisons among partners, emotional betrayal, meaningless relationships, and (for guys at least) child support payments?
Expect Obama to initiate some sort of “Copulation Care Reform” after his uber successful “Health Care Reform”.
Under his Health Care benefits citizens will stay younger & more fertile longer with increased vitality, greater vibrancy, more physically active, enhanced sexual attractiveness and potency that mandatory new coupling arrangements will be necessary to spread the sexual wealth.
The MSM is trying to bring back wife-swapping I see.
Been married 17 years, yes, it’s possible, it’s the best way to live ...
Ruh ro, is Zero hitting the interns too ??
Gee, I don’t know. Let me see how the next 30 years go.
Yes.
Next question?
Numerous studies have proven that pattern and routine are key to maintain stress levels, happiness, and good health. By constantly drifting from one partner to another, not knowing where your seed is going, not knowing who else has been with that person, it’s not conducive to good health and well being.
Human beings are an order of intelligence above most species. Look at birds, they mate for life, as do some primates. This has absolutely nothing to do with the Bible or religion, this is a common sense morality issue. Cavorting with numerous partners in this day and age is a bad idea.
I’ve found my lady for life, and I couldn’t be happier. Knowing that same woman will be there for me for the rest of my life is a lot better than wondering what inkwell I’ll be dipping into next.
the ongoing effort to totally deconstruct marriage and the family just never lets up
76% of people who marry, marry once.
****It’s no coincidence that 1984 and Brave New World, both socialist dystopias, either devalue the family or eliminate it completely.****
Modern day prophecy...should have long ago been included as the New New Testament in the Bible.
We are already living those predictions with IVF and the most recent science cloning news - surrogate mothers and abortion as birth control. We are witnessing 21st century barbarians among us.
Hey, anything’s better than “The Message Remixed”! ;-)
Theoretically, we could all play around and come home to our mates....both with the full knowledge of the others ‘playtime.’ In reality, though, this does not work because it is impossible to seperate the ‘playtime’ from the rest of your being. Emotions, insecurities, and trusts issues will just burst to the top. Ultimately, any thrill that one gets from ‘playing’—and there is a thrill, no denying that— is just far outweighed by the ‘confusion, pain, chaos’ it creates in the rest of your life.
With that said, if the relationship is not a loving one, disregard everything written above. And, admittedly, you ‘swingers’ out there are either not in love with your spouse, on drugs, or have absolutely no jealousy bone in your body whatsoever. I suspect you are simply not in love but, some people swear that they are. Who am I to say what the truth is.
Not only do I find it “easy”, I much prefer it to, say....constant heartbrak, exposure to STD’s, and making my kids to constantly adjust to new adults in their lives.
I think it is possible...although not with the psycho I was married to for fifteen long and arduous years...(hehe).
Not dating now for same reason....next one could be an ax murderer! (hehehe)
Character ....
This is nuts...
Whether you stay true to your word or not is a choice.
Has nothing to do with whether if it is possible.
People choose to either honor their commitments or not.
Our world is being batted around by a bunch of nuts!
Maybe the question should be:
With all the BS in our schools, shown on TV, spewed by our non-representing representatives...
Is is possible to understand what a committment is or what love is?
It’s amazing that these articles on all the various possibilities for adult relationships never seem to take the raising of children into account. The romance/dating/falling-in-love part of life is a wonderful phase of life, but it is only one phase. Once you find a stable relationship and decide to bring kids into the world, the process of providing for and raising those children is pretty much a full-time commitment for the next 20+ years. If anything, raising kids with a spouse you know you can count on is EVEN MORE FUN than the process of falling in love with that person in the first place.
Sometimes life throws some curve balls. Single parents who struggle to put families back together have my full respect. However, the people in this article seem determined to perpetually live out the excitement and drama of a young adult falling in love for the first time, to the exclusion of enjoying the many other phases of family life. I pity their children, if they have any.
You think? Maybe theoretically possible ? Or is it just another patriarchal attempt to control and subjugate women? C'mon Boresh, tell us the truth!
CNN now promoting Adultery, broken families.
They just can’t stand the thought of Americans being happy and enjoying life.
Sick Pervs.
Been Married for 29 years and
she ain’t killed me yet
Close - but not yet
I repeat the vows to myself almost daily...
It is very stabilizing
WHOA.. someone really did a number on you.
They used narcissistic people as examples. What would narcissus know about meaningful, committed relationships that weren't all about them?
Dennis Prager has an excellent article on the subject:
Societies that did not place boundaries around sexuality were stymied in their development. The subsequent dominance of the Western world can largely be attributed to the sexual revolution initiated by Judaism and later carried forward by Christianity.
This revolution consisted of forcing the sexual genie into the marital bottle. It ensured that sex no longer dominated society,
http://catholiceducation.org/articles/sexuality/ho0003.html
It’s a choice, like not stealing when nobody is looking.
Define “realistic.”
If you love the person you have married, and believe that marriage is worthwhile and is of benefit to both you, your spouse, and your children; then, I cannot see how you can cheat on your spouse.
This is the person you love, the person you promised (in front of God's altar {usually} and both families) to be faithful to for the rest of your lives. How can you so deeply hurt that person by being unfaithful with someone else?
The longer I am married to this man, the more fulfilled I feel. I just had to have some surgery and while I was thinking about going through that it occurred to me that I had now spent more of my life with my husband than I had lived without him.
I want us to be that little old couple who is walking slowly, holding hands.
Yep, makes sense. And even in the Western world, sexually “progressive” societies are the ones with shrinking population, socialist economies, diplomatic weakness, etc.
I’m there, althought I don’t get to see my DH as we are on
really different shifts right now, but retirement is in the
near future. I pray that we both live to see that.
No kidding... hardly a day goes by that I don't give thanks that I am no longer with my crazy ex. Brytani and I have been together 15 wonderful years, and although we've had some tough times, we've worked through it and it's made our marriage stronger.
Character is what you do in the dark...
Some of my children’s copywork for this week:
Character is like a tree and reputation like its shadow. The shadow is what we think of it; the tree is the real thing. -Abraham Lincoln
Even a child is known by his deeds, whether what he does is pure and right. -Proverbs 20:11
Reputation is what men and women think of us; character is what God and angels know of us. -Thomas Paine
Character is doing the right thing when nobody’s looking. There are too many people who think that the only thing that’s right is to get by, and the only thing that’s wrong is to get caught. -JC Watts
How could a wife compare with her? Well, there is the detail that my wife is very cute, very tempting, disease free, and I get to keep my word while following God's word. I'd say that combination of advantages makes monogamy look a whole lot more realistic than this writer is claiming.
I’ll do her. End of discussion.
A girl must be like a blossom
With honey for just one man.
A man must be like honey bee
And gather all he can.
To fly from blossom to blossom
A honey bee must be free,
But blossom must not ever fly
From bee to bee to bee.
— Yul Brenner
It’s the old the grass is greener on the other side while you are standing in a lush green pasture thing. Your stupid lust has blinded you to what you have. Soon it will happen again with another. In the mean time you are getting less able to enjoy and appreciate all aspects of life. You become empty, shiftless and shallow.
Well, let’s just say 15 years of verbal abuse and all the other stuff have taken their toll...
Is monogamy natural? Probably not. Is monogamy necessary? Absolutely. I’ve been married for almost 19 years now, and sure it’s rough to turn down the opportunity to bed someone other than your wife, especially if the one you’re turning down is younger and hotter, but at what price a few moments of pleasure? A wise man would understand that as soon as the deed was done, it wouldn’t seem to be worth it anymore.
Nah, from the outside looking in, I'd most are in love. If they weren't it wouldn't be so tortuous. From what I can see, swinging essentially entails telling yourself every day that it doesn't hurt, when it hurts like hell. We as human beings have a great capacity for self-destructive behavior and swinging is just a drop in that bucket.
Unfortunately Yul was exceptionally poor at math. If all the flowers are being true to a single bee, and flowers and bees existing in relatively equal numbers, then the chances for the bee to flit from flower to flower are removed.
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