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Cosmo-nuts vs. the asteroid: The Russians are planning a space mission to save Earth
New York Daily News ^ | Monday, January 4th 2010

Posted on 01/04/2010 4:35:14 PM PST by presidio9

Little Sally, Little Billy, rest your heads. Do not worry about that terrible asteroid Apophis that NASA says has a 1-in-250,000 chance of obliterating planet Earth in 2036, when you will be turning 32.

The asteroid will not destroy your brand new house, the one you bought with a sub-sub-prime mortgage. It won't land on your shiny electric Lexus with autodrunkensteer. It won't interrupt season 35 of "24," in which Jack Bauer tortures the thugs who swapped his Viagra for Metamucil.

Why? Because Anatoly Perminov of Russia's space agency is reporting for duty. His agency is considering sending a spacecraft to knock the asteroid off its path.

It would be kind of like in "Armageddon," the sucky movie with Bruce Willis and the Aerosmith lead singer's daughter. But it'd be even more sucky if Apophis crashed into your iTeleponder, right, Little Sally, Little Billy? Especially if it happens right when we've licked global warming.

The Russians are coming. And maybe they will even send a monkey to pilot the rocket. So rest your sweet little heads.


TOPICS: Editorial; Miscellaneous; News/Current Events; Russia
KEYWORDS: apophis; asteroids

1 posted on 01/04/2010 4:35:15 PM PST by presidio9
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To: presidio9

Oh good! Then they’re planning on relocating the Leftists?


2 posted on 01/04/2010 4:39:03 PM PST by DoughtyOne (Good news. HC bill will not cover illegal aliens. Bad news. 20-35 million will be made citizens.)
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To: presidio9

Kinda pointless to mess with this one but the idea of being prepared is a good idea.


3 posted on 01/04/2010 4:40:13 PM PST by cripplecreek (Seniors, the new shovel ready project under socialized medicine.)
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To: DoughtyOne; cripplecreek
Oh good! Then they’re planning on relocating the Leftists?

Assuming they are even capable of something like this anymore, I guess now we have to trust them not screw it up and steer Apophis on an even more direct course to Earth. Al Gore is going to go batsh!t when he figures that one out!

4 posted on 01/04/2010 4:42:45 PM PST by presidio9 (Islam is as Islam does)
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To: presidio9

Round up Congress and blast them into space. At least it would be a start to saving America.


5 posted on 01/04/2010 4:43:40 PM PST by Trod Upon (Obama: Making the Carter malaise look good. Misery Index in 3...2...1)
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To: presidio9

I don’t know you guys. Perhaps the Russians are just trying to beat Gore to the punch. The Galaxy is heating up you know...

;-)


6 posted on 01/04/2010 4:44:07 PM PST by DoughtyOne (Good news. HC bill will not cover illegal aliens. Bad news. 20-35 million will be made citizens.)
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To: presidio9

Them screwing it up is my biggest concern.


7 posted on 01/04/2010 4:51:23 PM PST by cripplecreek (Seniors, the new shovel ready project under socialized medicine.)
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To: Trod Upon
Round up Congress and blast them into space. At least it would be a start to saving America.

Then Space itself will pelt us with meteor after meteor out of anger with the human race for sending its garbage into space...

8 posted on 01/04/2010 4:51:49 PM PST by bayliving (1 if by land, 2 if by sea and 3 if by our own government.)
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To: DoughtyOne

Silly Ruskies, all you need is one of these!

http://spaceweather.com/images2010/03jan10/comet_c2_anim.gif?PHPSESSID=qnfgdh36opb3nobumiqe0spbu4


9 posted on 01/04/2010 4:53:43 PM PST by winoneforthegipper (I will follow the "True North-star" and that's, Sarah!)
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To: winoneforthegipper

What are we looking at there?


10 posted on 01/04/2010 4:58:00 PM PST by DoughtyOne (Good news. HC bill will not cover illegal aliens. Bad news. 20-35 million will be made citizens.)
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To: DoughtyOne; winoneforthegipper

That’s an extreme close-up of my left eyeball two mornings ago.


11 posted on 01/04/2010 5:07:47 PM PST by presidio9 (Islam is as Islam does)
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To: presidio9

I bet they bounce it into a collision course with earth.


12 posted on 01/04/2010 5:15:12 PM PST by Flag_This (ACORN delenda est)
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To: presidio9

I’m sure the author thought he was being terribly cute and clever, but his snottiness aside what’s wrong with taking the first steps in learning the techniques for protecting the earth ?

Men like Buzz Aldrin have been telling us for years it’s something we need to do.


13 posted on 01/04/2010 5:27:50 PM PST by tlb
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To: presidio9

I really don’t see the reason for ridiculing the Russian on this one.

If I am corect, after that first pass, the orbit can be altered and those odds on the second pass could change with little time for us to react.


14 posted on 01/04/2010 5:29:30 PM PST by Williams (It's the policies, stupid)
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To: tlb
what’s wrong with taking the first steps in learning the techniques for protecting the earth ?

Nothing. When the need arises, we'll be glad we got ourselves up to speed. But this one is definitely not a team effort, and it's not something I trust the Russians to do. After we save man and every other species from total anihilation, the rest to the planet can feel free to not thank us as usual.

15 posted on 01/04/2010 5:32:07 PM PST by presidio9 (Islam is as Islam does)
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To: cripplecreek
lol

exactly my first thought.

It would be just like the commies to freaking mess up and put in on a direct collision course with us.

16 posted on 01/04/2010 5:39:49 PM PST by TexasFreeper2009 (Obama lied, the economy died)
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To: winoneforthegipper
I'm giving the Russians a pass on this one.

I'm still grateful to them for hacking into the emails of the global warming scientists con men.

17 posted on 01/04/2010 6:24:32 PM PST by patriciaruth (http://www.freerepublic.com/focus/f-news/1993905/posts)
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To: DoughtyOne
A comet committing suicide....via the sun's gravitational pull....lol
18 posted on 01/04/2010 6:27:02 PM PST by winoneforthegipper (I will follow the "True North-star" and that's, Sarah!)
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To: presidio9

I had to wk... LOL


19 posted on 01/04/2010 7:28:18 PM PST by DoughtyOne (Good news. HC bill will not cover illegal aliens. Bad news. 20-35 million will be made citizens.)
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To: presidio9

I had to ask... LOL


20 posted on 01/04/2010 7:28:27 PM PST by DoughtyOne (Good news. HC bill will not cover illegal aliens. Bad news. 20-35 million will be made citizens.)
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To: winoneforthegipper

That would have been my first guess. my second would have been Jupiter. Since it didn’t look like either, I asked. :-)


21 posted on 01/04/2010 7:43:03 PM PST by DoughtyOne (Good news. HC bill will not cover illegal aliens. Bad news. 20-35 million will be made citizens.)
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