Skip to comments.Cosmo-nuts vs. the asteroid: The Russians are planning a space mission to save Earth
Posted on 01/04/2010 4:35:14 PM PST by presidio9
Little Sally, Little Billy, rest your heads. Do not worry about that terrible asteroid Apophis that NASA says has a 1-in-250,000 chance of obliterating planet Earth in 2036, when you will be turning 32.
The asteroid will not destroy your brand new house, the one you bought with a sub-sub-prime mortgage. It won't land on your shiny electric Lexus with autodrunkensteer. It won't interrupt season 35 of "24," in which Jack Bauer tortures the thugs who swapped his Viagra for Metamucil.
Why? Because Anatoly Perminov of Russia's space agency is reporting for duty. His agency is considering sending a spacecraft to knock the asteroid off its path.
It would be kind of like in "Armageddon," the sucky movie with Bruce Willis and the Aerosmith lead singer's daughter. But it'd be even more sucky if Apophis crashed into your iTeleponder, right, Little Sally, Little Billy? Especially if it happens right when we've licked global warming.
The Russians are coming. And maybe they will even send a monkey to pilot the rocket. So rest your sweet little heads.
Oh good! Then they’re planning on relocating the Leftists?
Kinda pointless to mess with this one but the idea of being prepared is a good idea.
Assuming they are even capable of something like this anymore, I guess now we have to trust them not screw it up and steer Apophis on an even more direct course to Earth. Al Gore is going to go batsh!t when he figures that one out!
Round up Congress and blast them into space. At least it would be a start to saving America.
I don’t know you guys. Perhaps the Russians are just trying to beat Gore to the punch. The Galaxy is heating up you know...
Them screwing it up is my biggest concern.
Then Space itself will pelt us with meteor after meteor out of anger with the human race for sending its garbage into space...
Silly Ruskies, all you need is one of these!
What are we looking at there?
That’s an extreme close-up of my left eyeball two mornings ago.
I bet they bounce it into a collision course with earth.
I’m sure the author thought he was being terribly cute and clever, but his snottiness aside what’s wrong with taking the first steps in learning the techniques for protecting the earth ?
Men like Buzz Aldrin have been telling us for years it’s something we need to do.
I really don’t see the reason for ridiculing the Russian on this one.
If I am corect, after that first pass, the orbit can be altered and those odds on the second pass could change with little time for us to react.
Nothing. When the need arises, we'll be glad we got ourselves up to speed. But this one is definitely not a team effort, and it's not something I trust the Russians to do. After we save man and every other species from total anihilation, the rest to the planet can feel free to not thank us as usual.
exactly my first thought.
It would be just like the commies to freaking mess up and put in on a direct collision course with us.
I'm still grateful to them for hacking into the emails of the global warming
scientists con men.
I had to wk... LOL
I had to ask... LOL
That would have been my first guess. my second would have been Jupiter. Since it didn’t look like either, I asked. :-)