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A Hidden Crime: Domestic Violence Against Men Is a Growing Problem
Daily Finance ^ | January 30, 2010 | Bruce Watson

Posted on 02/01/2010 11:09:35 AM PST by FreeManDC

Amid the media frenzy over Tiger Woods and Bengals receiver Chris Henry, a key aspect of both stories slipped through the cracks: Like millions of other men, Woods and Henry were -- allegedly at least -- the victims of domestic violence perpetrated by their wives or girlfriends. Beyond its brutal physical and psychological costs, domestic violence against men exacts a cruel economic toll at the personal, societal and national levels.

For the most part, the media, authorities and average citizens see domestic violence as a crime that is committed by men and victimizes women. Consequently, funding to combat the problem has overwhelmingly been spent on programs that support women.

Widely Ignored Problem

And yet, more than 200 survey-based studies show that domestic violence is just as likely to strike men as women. In fact, the overwhelming mass of evidence indicates that half of all domestic violence cases involve an exchange of blows and the remaining 50% is evenly split between men and women who are brutalized by their partners.

Part of the reason that this problem is widely ignored lies in the notion that battered males are weak or unmanly. A good example of this is the Barry Williams case: Recently, the former Brady Bunch star sought a restraining order against his live-in girlfriend, who had hit him, stolen $29,000 from his bank account, attempted to kick and stab him and had repeatedly threatened his life.

It is hard to imagine a media outlet mocking a battered woman, but E! online took the opportunity to poke fun at Williams, comparing the event to various Brady Bunch episodes. Similarly, when Saturday Night Live ran a segment in which a frightened Tiger Woods was repeatedly brutalized by his wife, the show was roundly attacked -- for being insensitive to musical guest Rihanna, herself a victim of domestic violence.

Lack of Research

Sometimes it is impossible to ignore the problem, but when domestic violence against men turns deadly -- as in the case of actor Phil Hartman -- the focus tends to shift to mental illness. The same can be said of the Andrea Yates case, which many pundits presented as the story of how an insensitive husband can drive a wife to murder.

Much of the information on domestic violence against men is anecdotal, largely because of the lack of funding to study the problem. Although several organizations explore domestic violence, the biggest single resource is the Department of Justice, which administers grants through its Office on Violence Against Women.

For years, the DOJ has explicitly refused to fund studies that investigate domestic violence against men. According to specialists in this field, the DOJ recently agreed to cover this problem -- as long as researchers give equal time to addressing violence against women.

First National Study

Researchers Denise Hines and Emily Douglas recently completed the first national study to scientifically measure the mental and social impact of domestic violence on male victims. Interestingly, their research was funded by the National Institutes of Mental Health, not the DOJ. Not only does this demonstrate the lack of resources for researchers of this issue, but it also suggests that male battering is perceived as a mental health issue, not a crime.

This decriminalization of domestic violence against men affects research conclusions. While survey-based studies have found that men and women commit domestic violence in equal numbers, crime-based studies show that women are far more likely to be victimized. This inconsistency begins to make sense when one considers that man-on-woman violence tends to be seen through a criminal lens, while woman-on-man violence is viewed more benignly.

A recent 32-nation study revealed that more than 51% of men and 52% of women felt that there were times when it was appropriate for a wife to slap her husband. By comparison, only 26% of men and 21% of women felt that there were times when it was appropriate for a husband to slap his wife. Murray Straus, creator of the Conflict Tactics Scale and one of the authors of the study, explained this discrepancy: "We don't perceive men as victims. We see women as being more vulnerable than men."

Kneed In The Groin

This trend becomes particularly striking when one considers the 1996 case of Minnesota Vikings quarterback Warren Moon, who tried to restrain his wife after she threw a candlestick at his head and kneed him in the groin. Subsequently charged with spousal abuse, he was only acquitted after his wife admitted that she attacked him -- and that her wounds were self-inflicted. Ironically, her admission of fault did not result in charges being brought against her.

While Moon's trial was particularly high profile, his situation is actually very common. In fact, studies have found that a man who calls the police to report domestic violence is three times more likely to be arrested than the woman who is abusing him.

The mainstream perception of domestic violence also impacts the resources that are available to battered men. For example, the Domestic Abuse Helpline for Men and Women, the only national toll-free hot line that specializes in helping male victims of domestic violence, has faced numerous roadblocks in its search for funding. In Maine, where the helpline is based, the surest route to funding is through membership in the Maine Coalition to End Domestic Violence.

On A Shoestring

But, according to Helpline director Jan Brown, the Coalition refused to even issue the program an application for membership, effectively denying it access to funding. Today, 45 Helpline volunteers field 550 calls per month, 80% of which are from men or people who are looking for help on behalf of a man. Operating with a yearly budget of less than $15,000, it provides intensive training to its workers and offers victims housing, food, bus tickets and a host of other services.

The Helpline's sheltering services are informal and ad hoc, largely because its lack of access to funding makes a shelter financially impossible. In fact, of the estimated 1,200 to 1,800 shelters in the U.S., only one -- the Valley Oasis shelter in Antelope Valley, Calif. -- provides a full range of shelter services to men. And, on average, less than 10% of OVW funds allocated to fight domestic violence are used to help men.

For male victims of domestic violence, the legal system can become another tool for abuse. As in the Moon case, battered men are often likely to find themselves arrested, even when they are the ones who call the police. And, even after the arrest, the process of incarceration, restraining orders, divorce court and child custody hearings continue to disadvantage men.

A High Cost

Restraining orders are a particularly difficult hurdle. Radar Services, a watchdog organization, estimates that approximately 85% of the roughly 2 million temporary restraining orders that are issued every year are made against men. In many states, the requirements for an order are exceedingly vague: In Oregon, for example, a "fear" of violence is sufficient for a restraining order, while Michigan issues them to protect family members against "fear of mental harm."

But there's nothing vague about the effect of restraining orders: They often turn men out of their homes, deny them access to children and result in further personal costs as millions of men have to find new places to live, hire lawyers and pay other expenses. For some men, as Hines and Brown point out, the legal system gives abusive wives and girlfriends tools to continue attacks even after their relationships end.

As Straus notes, "The preponderance of [domestic violence] resources should be made available to women. They are injured more often, are more economically vulnerable, and are often responsible for the couple's children. That having been said, more resources need to be made available to men."

There is no doubt that domestic violence against men can be reduced; the domestic violence initiatives of the past 40 years have brought a hidden crime to light and provided protection for millions of women. The next step is to admit that domestic violence is not a male or female problem, but rather a human problem, and that a lasting solution must address the cruelty -- and suffering -- of both sexes.


TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Culture/Society
KEYWORDS: divorce; feminazi; feminism; hillary; lawyers; ofp; violence

1 posted on 02/01/2010 11:09:37 AM PST by FreeManDC
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To: FreeManDC

Okay, including Tiger Woods in this was NOT a good idea.


2 posted on 02/01/2010 11:11:48 AM PST by ReneeLynn (Socialism is SO yesterday. Fascism, it*s the new black. Mmm Mmm Mmm.)
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To: FreeManDC

Sorry, Tigger deserved a 3 iron to the head. That isn’t domestic violence, it is poetic justice.


3 posted on 02/01/2010 11:12:44 AM PST by mnehring
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To: FreeManDC
Way back in the 1970's I had a crazy Anthropology professor who spent most of each class ranting about domestic violence. I once brought up a NYT article that discussed women hitting men, and I thought she was going to kill me. "Men can take it!" she hissed. "Or are they such sissies that they're afraid of women??"

This sort of attitude by the true believers in the field of domestic violence may explain the "lack of research" about men being abused.

4 posted on 02/01/2010 11:14:31 AM PST by ClearCase_guy (We have the 1st so that we can call on people to rebel. We have 2nd so that they can.)
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To: ClearCase_guy
Men can take it!" she hissed. "Or are they such sissies that they're afraid of women??"

The fact is that pretty much a woman can hit a man, steal from him, take his kids and go off then claim fear of abuse and family courts will back her everytime. It's getting better but family court is extremely biased against men.

5 posted on 02/01/2010 11:19:10 AM PST by YankeeReb
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To: ReneeLynn

Why not? Tiger Woods was a victim of domestic violence according to reports that I have seen. He certainly was a scoundrel for his behavior. However, promiscous behavior is no excuse for domestic violence.

In my informal observations, I have noted that women regard infidelity as a valid reason for violence. Perhaps the women I have conversed with are not serious. I do not condone infidelity in any way but I think this attitude is a dangerous double standard. I doubt that the same women would think that men should be allowed to commit violence when a women is not faithful. This attitude seems to pervade the middle east in which any possible infidelity (defined very broadly) justifies violence.


6 posted on 02/01/2010 11:19:20 AM PST by businessprofessor
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To: mnehring

Let’s flip that and say that the wife was the one cattin’ around...

would it be “poetic justice” for “Tigger” to “upside her with a 3 iron”?


7 posted on 02/01/2010 11:21:19 AM PST by MrB (The difference between a humanist and a Satanist is that the latter knows who he's working for.)
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To: FreeManDC

I was an invetigator for the Fanmily Court here in my home conty. This goes on a lot more than anyone knows.


8 posted on 02/01/2010 11:22:16 AM PST by CaptRon
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To: CaptRon

most men won’t report it because they know the outcome in 90% of divorce cases...they lose everything.


9 posted on 02/01/2010 11:24:33 AM PST by WOBBLY BOB (ACORN:American Corruption for Obama Right Now)
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To: mnehring
Sorry, Tigger deserved a 3 iron to the head

Suppose that Elin had been slutting around with every Tom, Dick, and Harry ...

Would Elin have deserved a 3-iron to the head?

Would you condone a potentially lethal assault on a serially adulterous woman?

10 posted on 02/01/2010 11:28:14 AM PST by ArrogantBustard (Western Civilization is Aborting, Buggering, and Contracepting itself out of existence.)
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To: FreeManDC
The Female of the Species.
11 posted on 02/01/2010 11:29:17 AM PST by DuncanWaring (The Lord uses the good ones; the bad ones use the Lord.)
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To: MrB

Of course not.. call it a double standard if you must, but I grew up being taught chivalry and being a man- which involves never striking a woman. This new castrati attitude that is emerging where men somehow whine that either they can’t strike a woman or complain about the double standard when they do is puzzling to me.


12 posted on 02/01/2010 11:29:34 AM PST by mnehring
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To: ArrogantBustard

see 12 so I don’t have to repeat myself.


13 posted on 02/01/2010 11:30:01 AM PST by mnehring
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To: FreeManDC

A HUGE double standard.

If a man did that(the golf club and window smashing and cell fone as a weapon) to his philandering wife, he’d be in so much trouble, he’d be wishing he’d let her continue to screw around on him.


14 posted on 02/01/2010 11:30:35 AM PST by swarthyguy (My toast when imbibing: "Beer hu Akbar" - Riposte - "Inshallah")
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To: mnehring

“Sorry, Tigger deserved a 3 iron to the head. That isn’t domestic violence, it is poetic justice.”

Would you say that uif it were a female tennis star getting whacked by a male - no matter if she was a cheater or not?


15 posted on 02/01/2010 11:36:16 AM PST by Pessimist (u)
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To: mnehring
but I grew up being taught chivalry

Chivalry and being a gentleman is not a suicide pact.

This new castrati attitude

Nice ... throw insults into the argument ... I pretty quickly lose respect for folks who do that.

complain about the double standard

If ladies want to be treated like ladies, they should act like ladies. If not ...

16 posted on 02/01/2010 11:36:55 AM PST by ArrogantBustard (Western Civilization is Aborting, Buggering, and Contracepting itself out of existence.)
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To: FreeManDC
No man should be beaten by a woman. Men have to take abuse because male training tells them its unmanly to hit a woman even in self-defense. Domestic violence is wrong period, regardless of the gender of the perpetrator. As a society we need to acknowledge domestic violence isn't an exclusively female problem; its a very real human problem and there should be zero tolerance for it - regardless of the sex of the victim.

"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find only things evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelogus

17 posted on 02/01/2010 11:44:39 AM PST by goldstategop (In Memory Of A Dearly Beloved Friend Who Lives In My Heart Forever)
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To: mnehring
Sorry, Tigger deserved a 3 iron to the head. That isn’t domestic violence, it is poetic justice.

Would you consider a cheating wife equally deserving of a 3-iron to the head? If not, why?

18 posted on 02/01/2010 11:44:59 AM PST by PapaBear3625 (Public healthcare looks like it will work as well as public housing did.)
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To: mnehring

Oh, I’m not saying that men SHOULD strike women,
but women should not strike men with weapons, either.

Especially when such an attack could be deadly.


19 posted on 02/01/2010 11:47:22 AM PST by MrB (The difference between a humanist and a Satanist is that the latter knows who he's working for.)
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To: ArrogantBustard
No one is saying women don't deserve respect and courteous treatment. But that doesn't give them a license to batter men and yes men should defend themselves if they feel their life is threatened.

"Show me just what Mohammed brought that was new, and there you will find only things evil and inhuman, such as his command to spread by the sword the faith he preached." - Manuel II Palelogus

20 posted on 02/01/2010 11:47:34 AM PST by goldstategop (In Memory Of A Dearly Beloved Friend Who Lives In My Heart Forever)
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To: goldstategop
But that doesn't give them a license to batter men

I agree ... some folks apparently see things otherwise.

21 posted on 02/01/2010 11:49:10 AM PST by ArrogantBustard (Western Civilization is Aborting, Buggering, and Contracepting itself out of existence.)
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To: mnehring
This new castrati attitude that is emerging where men somehow whine that either they can’t strike a woman or complain about the double standard when they do is puzzling to me.

It's more like: if it's objectionable for a man to strike a woman, then it should be equally objectionable for a woman to strike a man -- particularly if done with a potentially deadly weapon (like a 3-iron).

Research I've read points out that women who do violence against men are much more likely to use a weapon rather than just bare hands.

22 posted on 02/01/2010 11:50:16 AM PST by PapaBear3625 (Public healthcare looks like it will work as well as public housing did.)
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To: PapaBear3625

Well, yeah, you wouldn’t want to break a nail, would you?

Sorry, couldn’t resist. Seriously, neither gender needs to be taking a swing at the other. People need to control themselves.


23 posted on 02/01/2010 12:10:39 PM PST by Hoffer Rand (There ARE two Americas: "God's children" and the tax payers)
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To: mnehring

Yes and no, I think he deserved an a$$ kickin’ but what if it had been his wife who was unfaithful and Tiger kicked her rear end? It would be a totally different story.

So if men can’t beat up women for real grievances then women can’t beat up men.


24 posted on 02/01/2010 12:11:09 PM PST by tiki (True Christians will not deliberately slander or misrepresent others or their beliefs)
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To: FreeManDC
"Domestic violence" is a judgment call. It does not generally belong in the criminal code unless there is a dead body involved. It was the lesbian, anti-family social workers and lawyers in recent decades who brought the all-knowing, all caring State into family disputes.

Bad husbands are bad. But in years past, civilization did not therefore grind to a halt; the existence of the wife's father and brothers gave the vast majority of husbands reason to be relatively reasonable and respectful. And I wouldn't be surprised if there weren't more domesticated violence against men now because the women know they can call the law and claim victimhood if the husband whacks them back.

But maybe more to the point, far and away the highest rate of domestic violence isn't between husbands and wives. It's in couples who are cohabiting or "dating" (in the, er, Biblical sense). Intimacy before all the pieces are in place can be an explosive mixture. The population of unmarried couples includes many who don't know that much about their "partner," or even if they do, haven't given their families a real stake in the bond, as happens in a marriage. And that group also includes a great many short-fused people not psychologically stable enough for marriage.

25 posted on 02/01/2010 12:11:48 PM PST by SamuraiScot
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To: mnehring
Of course not.. call it a double standard if you must, but I grew up being taught chivalry and being a man- which involves never striking a woman.

Nope. A gentleman never strikes a lady.

OTOH, if she pops you one, she ain't no lady.

26 posted on 02/01/2010 12:12:49 PM PST by Sherman Logan (Never confuse schooling with education.)
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To: ClearCase_guy

Erin Pizzey was the lead person in the whole “domestic violence” field, establishing the first women’s shelter in the world, in Britain.

She later came to the conclusion that many cases, perhaps close to half, are precipitated, conciously or subconciously, by the woman, who gets a variety of emotional benefits from being the victim. An example is my best friend in high school, who essentially rescued a “battered woman” from an abuser and eventually married her. He is one of the kindest, gentlest men in the world. After three years she dumped him and went out and found another guy who beats her up regularly.

Which is not to say the evil male of the stereotype doesn’t also exist.

Pizzey was utterly ostracized by the feminist community, of whom she’d been a revered leader. Including death threats.

Very brave and honest woman.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Erin_Pizzey


27 posted on 02/01/2010 12:21:56 PM PST by Sherman Logan (Never confuse schooling with education.)
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To: CaptRon
This goes on a lot more than anyone knows.

Yes it does sir.

28 posted on 02/01/2010 12:28:03 PM PST by Mark17
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To: goldstategop

No man should be beaten by a woman. Men have to take abuse because male training tells them its unmanly to hit a woman even in self-defense. Domestic violence is wrong period, regardless of the gender of the perpetrator. As a society we need to acknowledge domestic violence isn’t an exclusively female problem; its a very real human problem and there should be zero tolerance for it - regardless of the sex of the victim.

That is the truth.


29 posted on 02/01/2010 12:33:03 PM PST by bayouranger (The 1st victim of islam is the person who practices the lie.)
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To: mnehring

“call it a double standard if you must, but I grew up being taught chivalry and being a man- which involves never striking a woman.”

I rush to inform you that part of being a “lady” involves not striking men. No double standard there. Both men and women are encouraged not to strike out at one another.

“This new castrati attitude that is emerging where men somehow whine that either they can’t strike a woman or complain about the double standard when they do is puzzling to me.”

That’s really neither here nor there. okay, you may have a point about the whining part (then again, how often do you hear men complain about being hit, apart from frustration over not being able to hit back?). But you were talking about Tiger Woods specifically, and Tiger Woods, to my knowledge, hasn’t publicly complained, nor struck back, nor used the double-standard argument. Which leads me to wonder just what it is that you’re talking about.


30 posted on 02/01/2010 12:37:18 PM PST by Tublecane
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To: mnehring
Of course not.. call it a double standard if you must, but I grew up being taught chivalry and being a man- which involves never striking a woman. This new castrati attitude that is emerging where men somehow whine that either they can’t strike a woman or complain about the double standard when they do is puzzling to me.

Sounds like you're puzzled pretty easily. I'm going to assume that you're an older guy, raised in a time when, while men were taught to be men, women were taught to be ladies. Back in those days, chivalry was a beautiful thing. It made the world go 'round. Fast forward to today. Chivalry is dead, and it was the feminists who killed it. How did they kill it? By convincing women that they should be selfish promiscuous expletives rather than ladies, and that all men are evil rapists. Nowadays, we have seen far too many women literally get away with murder. They drown their kids, shoot their husbands in their sleep, cut their husbands' privates off, and then walk with a legal slap on the wrist. Certainly there are still ladies in the world, but the old rules of chivalry no longer apply in a blanket fashion. Anyone who sticks to those old rules blindly is a fool.

Does that mean that men should go around hitting women? Of course not. But men need to recognize that the female side of chivalry is gone, so when you see your dearheart frothing at the mouth and eyeballing the large kitchen knife while shrieking that she hates you, if you take pimp-slapping off the table of acceptable options, I say it's your funeral.
31 posted on 02/01/2010 2:00:11 PM PST by fr_freak
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To: FreeManDC
For male victims of domestic violence, the legal system can become another tool for abuse. As in the Moon case, battered men are often likely to find themselves arrested, even when they are the ones who call the police. And, even after the arrest, the process of incarceration, restraining orders, divorce court and child custody hearings continue to disadvantage men.

Also loss of your right to keep and bear arms. Say bye bye to your gun collection.

The bottom line is odds are strong that a man who defends himself, and the authorities get involved, will lose big time. You might be able to defend yourself physically, if you are strong enough and fast enough (assuming you are awake and know what's coming), but try keeping someone from calling the cops or inflicting injury on themselves and accusing you of doing it.

32 posted on 02/01/2010 3:31:20 PM PST by TigersEye (It's the Marxism, stupid! ... And they call themselves Progressives.)
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To: WOBBLY BOB

I saw something on TV last week saying that 80% of men win custody cases. I’m here to tell you from sitting in the courtroom that that’s pure BS.


33 posted on 02/01/2010 5:33:38 PM PST by CaptRon
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