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Women Really Want Abstinence-Based Empowerment, Not NOW and Casual Sex
LifeNews.com ^ | February 19, 2010 | Jennifer A. Marshall

Posted on 03/01/2010 11:38:47 AM PST by OriginalChristian

A group that thinks an ad celebrating Tim Tebow's life is bad news for women might be a little out of touch with what women really want.

That helps explain why the National Organization for Women and other feminist groups have vehemently opposed abstinence education while failing to notice that a culture of casual sex hasn't been so liberating for women.

Just ask the 29-year-old Briton living in America whose anonymous account appeared in her country's left-wing Guardian newspaper.

"(M)y sexual liberation was perversely trapping me in destructive relationships, while intimacy had become something elusive, insubstantial, disappointing, surreal," she writes. Weary of a "burlesque comedy where we all pretended we were emotionless and cool," she decided to stop having sex because "I wanted sex to be, quite simply, special again."

Similar world-weary statements have been recorded by researchers such as Dr. Miriam Grossman, author of "Unprotected," and Laura Sessions Stepp, author of "Unhooked: How Young Women Pursue Sex, Delay Love and Lose at Both."

Only a third of young women say they truly wanted to have sex the first time they did, Stepp reports. Young women, she writes, "are trying to make sense of what is arguably the most confusing sexual landscape any generation has ever faced."

(Excerpt) Read more at lifenews.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society; News/Current Events; United Kingdom
KEYWORDS: abstinence; empowerment; moralabsolutes; now
LifeNews.com Note: Jennifer Marshall is the director of the DeVos Center for Religion and Civil Society at The Heritage Foundation and author of "Now and Not Yet: Making Sense of Single Life in the Twenty-First Century."

I searched in whole and in part on the keyword 'Women' back to past the 19th and didn't see this posted. If it is a re-post, accept my apologies and AdminMods, please pull if so desired. Thanks... OC

1 posted on 03/01/2010 11:38:47 AM PST by OriginalChristian
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To: OriginalChristian

Maybe God was right after all.


2 posted on 03/01/2010 11:41:22 AM PST by ilovesarah2012
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To: OriginalChristian

notice how some people’s bad choices are always soemone else’s fault.

if it ain’t ‘the man’, it’s ‘the women’s liberation group’.
face it ladies, if you don’t use good sense, and if you buy into a demeaning lifestyle, it ain’t nobody else’s fault.


3 posted on 03/01/2010 11:45:42 AM PST by camle (keep an open mind and someone will fill it full of something for you)
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To: OriginalChristian
Not NOW and Casual Sex

Bummer...

4 posted on 03/01/2010 11:47:07 AM PST by grobdriver (Proud Member, Party Of No! No Socialism - No Fascism - Nobama - No Way!)
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To: OriginalChristian

The Woodstock generation tried so hard to imprint the “it’s okay to have casual sex” message that now girls are trapped in a culture that can’t say the message: “it’s okay NOT to have casual sex”. Unintended consequences yet again.


5 posted on 03/01/2010 11:52:08 AM PST by moodyskeptic (the counterculture votes R)
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To: OriginalChristian

Oldest proverb in the book... why would a guy buy the cow when he can get the milk for free?


6 posted on 03/01/2010 11:52:27 AM PST by pnh102 (Regarding liberalism, always attribute to malice what you think can be explained by stupidity. - Me)
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To: pnh102

Why buy a cow when its much cheaper to rent?


7 posted on 03/01/2010 11:57:33 AM PST by Beagle8U (Free Republic -- One stop shopping ....... It's the Conservative Super WalMart for news .)
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To: OriginalChristian

Oh boy. Another article talking about what women want. Whoopdy-doo. Here’s what I want: An article about how the men who never get what they want are tired of hearing about what you want every day.


8 posted on 03/01/2010 11:57:52 AM PST by Anti-Utopian ("Come, let's away to prison; We two alone will sing like birds I' th' cage." -King Lear [V,iii,6-8])
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To: moodyskeptic

I taught the abstinence program at the teen girl’s retreat in my church. It is really important for these young ladies to find out that they are too precious to be wasted on this one and that one. They have to know who they are and love themselves (meaning a precious child of G-d). Abstinence won’t stick unless that notion is married to the notion of honoring G-d with every fiber of your being including your temple.


9 posted on 03/01/2010 11:58:11 AM PST by brwnsuga (Black and Free!!!)
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To: OriginalChristian

“...she decided to stop having sex...”

Show of hands: how many guys will also pledge to stop having sex? Put your hands down! If “she” ain’t having sex then neither are you.


10 posted on 03/01/2010 11:58:46 AM PST by pappyone (New to Freep, still working a tag line.)
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To: Beagle8U; pnh102

True, but it sucks to lose the farm...


11 posted on 03/01/2010 12:02:12 PM PST by TSgt (RE-ELECT NOBODY - VOTE THEM ALL OUT!)
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To: pnh102
Oldest proverb in the book... why would a guy buy the cow when he can get the milk for free?
The problem with casual sex is not that it hurts women but that it hurts *men*. Now that all middle class women know how to use contraception or, in the worst case, the local abortion clinic. Without any consequences women have no reason to get married until they meet their "ideal" man. This leaves a good portion of men out in the cold and a good number of women spinsters into old age.
12 posted on 03/01/2010 12:02:41 PM PST by ketsu (It’s not a campaign. It’s a taxpayer-funded farewell tour.)
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To: ketsu
This leaves a good portion of men out in the cold and a good number of women spinsters into old age.

Maybe that is not such a bad thing. An older man has a much higher chance of entering into a relationship with a younger woman than an older woman and a younger man. If this sort of thinking helps to literally "kill off" the idea that one can wait around for the perfect man then maybe it is a good thing in disguise. :)

13 posted on 03/01/2010 12:09:45 PM PST by pnh102 (Regarding liberalism, always attribute to malice what you think can be explained by stupidity. - Me)
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To: MikeWUSAF

“True, but it sucks to lose the farm...”

Er..Uh..You lose the farm if you BUY the cow, not when you rent!


14 posted on 03/01/2010 12:13:04 PM PST by Beagle8U (Free Republic -- One stop shopping ....... It's the Conservative Super WalMart for news .)
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To: pnh102
Maybe that is not such a bad thing. An older man has a much higher chance of entering into a relationship with a younger woman than an older woman and a younger man. If this sort of thinking helps to literally "kill off" the idea that one can wait around for the perfect man then maybe it is a good thing in disguise. :)
Haha... this only works for the men who were popular when they were younger. It used to be that the bottom 30% of men got married off one way or another. Now they're lonely and weird into old age. At least they have the internet now.
15 posted on 03/01/2010 12:19:08 PM PST by ketsu (It’s not a campaign. It’s a taxpayer-funded farewell tour.)
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To: Beagle8U

True!

Renting should be legalized.


16 posted on 03/01/2010 12:19:35 PM PST by TSgt (RE-ELECT NOBODY - VOTE THEM ALL OUT!)
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To: brwnsuga

Thats so true.
Girls and yound women today are so bombarded with cultural cues that they MUST have sex or they are worthless.

The key is to instill the message that a girl/young woman has intrinsic value to herself, her family, her country, her GOD. She doesn’t need to ‘prove’ her worth to society by having casual sex (as is taught over and over in popular media).


17 posted on 03/01/2010 12:21:20 PM PST by Lorianne
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To: OriginalChristian

As a teenage boy growing up in the ‘70’s, “Women’s Lib” was the best thing that ever happened to my libido.


18 posted on 03/01/2010 12:25:35 PM PST by Ignatz (Helping others to be more like me since 1960!)
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To: MikeWUSAF

“Renting should be legalized.”

Er...Uh...Renting is legal. Dinner..drinks (lots of drinks)..


19 posted on 03/01/2010 12:27:08 PM PST by Beagle8U (Free Republic -- One stop shopping ....... It's the Conservative Super WalMart for news .)
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To: OriginalChristian
Only a third of young women say they truly wanted to have sex the first time they did

I hate stats like that because it implies that if you truly want to, it's OK. If we teach young men and women about getting and staying married and having children, then sex will be on our side instead of being an invincible enemy. Early marital indulgence I tell you! But how many young women get the contradicting message that education and career are more important than family?

20 posted on 03/01/2010 12:29:30 PM PST by Theophilus (Shall the throne of iniquity have fellowship with thee, which frameth mischief by a law?)
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To: pnh102

Yes indeed. It’s not as if a fertility rate at half replacement rate will have an adverse effect on our societies :/


21 posted on 03/01/2010 12:37:30 PM PST by LastNorwegian
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To: OriginalChristian; 185JHP; 230FMJ; Albion Wilde; Aleighanne; Alexander Rubin; ...
Moral Absolutes Ping!

Freepmail wagglebee to subscribe or unsubscribe from the moral absolutes ping list.

FreeRepublic moral absolutes keyword search
[ Add keyword moral absolutes to flag FR articles to this ping list ]

I find the comments on the thread quite telling. Actually, illicit sex hurts everyone equally; actually it hurts the children the most. Either the existing children who have absent fathers (or no married dad), sluts for mothers, live-in boyfriends in the house, etc. These used to be called "broken homes". Of course that phrase is now taboo, there are "alternate families".

And then there are the "unwanted" children of casual sex - aborted at worst, or kept, fatherless. Children of unwed mothers have a much more difficult life than those born with a married mother and father, this is indisbutable. Children with mom's "boyfriends" hanging aroud are much more likely to get abused or molested.

Each body is a temple, since the soul - the person we are - is dwelling within, and God is in everyone's hearts. Now maybe everyone doesn't believe this, but even still recognizing that God created the bodies and told us how to use them is reason enough not to degrade ourselves and others by using the bodies for instant gratification with no lifelong marriage commitment.

The truth is that we are more than our sensual appetites. We are not meant to be slaves to every whim that wants attention. People often equate "Liberty" with "License". Liberty or freedom entails responsibility. Living within the guidelines given in every religion in the world is human life; rejecting them and (pardon the language) humping on everything that moves like beasts in the field and forest is not human life; creates misery for everyone involved, and when enough people act like that - and are encouraged by the entire culture - then society goes to hell. As we see before our eyes.

22 posted on 03/01/2010 12:40:00 PM PST by little jeremiah (Asato Ma Sad Gamaya Tamaso Ma Jyotir Gamay)
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To: OriginalChristian

Good article. Thanks!


23 posted on 03/01/2010 12:44:42 PM PST by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
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To: OriginalChristian
Only a third of young women say they truly wanted to have sex the first time they did, Stepp reports. Young women, she writes, "are trying to make sense of what is arguably the most confusing sexual landscape any generation has ever faced."

And who has made it so? Women?! If you offer a man frre, no-strings-attached sex, ninety-nine times out ofone hundred he will accept. Just don't expect to engender much tenderness or feeling or earn any respect.

I hate to even ask this question but.... WHAT DO WOMEN WANT?

24 posted on 03/01/2010 12:45:59 PM PST by Rummyfan (Iraq: it's not about Iraq anymore, it's about the USA!)
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To: Rummyfan

That depends on the woman.


25 posted on 03/01/2010 12:47:25 PM PST by trisham (Zen is not easy. It takes effort to attain nothingness. And then what do you have? Bupkis.)
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To: pappyone
If “she” ain’t having sex then neither are you.

LOL!

26 posted on 03/01/2010 12:47:31 PM PST by Rummyfan (Iraq: it's not about Iraq anymore, it's about the USA!)
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To: ketsu

“Oldest proverb in the book... why would a guy buy the cow when he can get the milk for free?”

How about, Why buy the milk when you have a big fat cow at home?


27 posted on 03/01/2010 12:50:35 PM PST by jimmyo57
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To: ketsu
At least they have the internet now.

Did you mean an internet cow? :)

28 posted on 03/01/2010 12:52:35 PM PST by Free State Four
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To: OriginalChristian

Good post


29 posted on 03/01/2010 1:26:54 PM PST by walford (http://the-big-pic.org)
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To: pappyone

We did it. Wife and I never touched each other beyond a kiss before we hitched up, 2 years from first meeting to the honeymoon. God’s way. Worked out pretty darn well, 15 years married and in still love. Nice thing was, took a lot of stress off the dating, got to focus on other stuff.


30 posted on 03/01/2010 1:43:10 PM PST by DesertConservative
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To: pnh102

“A good thing in disguise.” I had a hell of a relationship with my husband. He died of cancer. I’m comfortable in my own skin and do not necessarily need another relationship. If the right guy comes along that’s good. If not, so be it. Being alone isn’t all that bad.


31 posted on 03/01/2010 2:21:09 PM PST by Sunshine Sister
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To: Theophilus

And I cannot count the number of young people who say they cannot afford children.


32 posted on 03/01/2010 3:02:27 PM PST by huldah1776
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To: huldah1776
And I cannot count the number of young people who say they cannot afford children.

What they really mean is that they think that they cannot afford to be selfless. But they are really cheating themselves. Can all the toys in the world compare to the joy of one's children? The true way to judge the value of something is how great we mourn its loss. And there is no greater grief than the loss of a child.

33 posted on 03/01/2010 4:49:34 PM PST by Petrosius
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To: little jeremiah

Amen, LJ!


34 posted on 03/02/2010 2:36:59 AM PST by Albion Wilde (Liberals love the poor so much they came up w/ a plan to create millions more of them. - Ann Coulter)
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To: Petrosius; huldah1776
And I cannot count the number of young people who say they cannot afford children.

My wife has been very indulgent to me, we are expecting our 10th. But both her mother and grandmother have tried to be very discouraging to her. Her grandmother raised 5 and her mother raised 4. The ironic thing is that when they recently posted her grandmother's 96th birthday announcement in the newspaper, they listed her 17 grandchildren, 42 great-grandchildren and 12 great-great-grandchildren. I think they're jealous. I joked with my wife, that when we call them after the baby is born, we can announce that her mom has broken her grandmother's record for grandchildren!

We can't take anything with us. But if we bring up our children in the nurture and admonition of the Lord, we have good hope for our eternal investment.

Matthew 6:20
But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal:

35 posted on 03/02/2010 3:06:13 AM PST by Theophilus (Shall the throne of iniquity have fellowship with thee, which frameth mischief by a law?)
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To: OriginalChristian
If every allegedly pro-life, able bodied, fertile, married couple since 1973 had had a more casual sex (with each other, no contraception) resulting in a conservative average of 4 children per pro-life marriage, Obama would not be president and we would have overturned Roe-v-Wade 10 years ago.

My wife learned this last weekend that more than 50% of students entering college have never shared a bathroom.

36 posted on 03/02/2010 3:15:56 AM PST by Theophilus (Shall the throne of iniquity have fellowship with thee, which frameth mischief by a law?)
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To: moodyskeptic

I don’t get how someone can have such intimate relations w/someone they don’t know.I wasn’t brought up that way and the idea makes me sick.


37 posted on 04/07/2010 10:34:21 PM PDT by POWERSBOOTHEFAN (Blessed Be The Name Of The Lord,For His Name Alone Is Exaulted)
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