Sgt. 1st Class Helen Foster, Division Special Troops Battalion, 3rd Infantry Division, poses next to her family photos while deployed to Contingency Operating Base Speicher, Tikrit, Iraq, April 28, 2010.
U.S. Army photo by Spc. Jessica Rohr.
Posted on 04/28/2010 8:28:38 PM PDT by SandRat
CONTINGENCY OPERATING BASE SPEICHER - When Soldiers are deployed, their spouses can be faced with challenges they haven't handled before. Taking care of children and the household alone are a few examples of what spouses face during their service member’s deployment.
Sgt. 1st Class Helen Foster, the non-commissioned officer in charge for human resources, Division Special Troops Battalion, 3rd Infantry Division, out of Fort Stewart, Ga., recently reflected on her family back home in Apple Valley, Minn., as May 7, Spouse Appreciation Day, nears.
Her husband of 20 years, David Foster, has taken on many new responsibilities. Helen makes a conscious effort to communicate with him whenever possible to thank him for his hard work.
"He always wants me to call, e-mail or Skype with him," she said. "At the beginning part of the deployment I was having a hard time doing that, only because I was wrapped up in work. I am getting a little bit better at [communicating], and I always thank him for what a great job he has been doing. I talk to him about three times a week on the phone, Skype two times a week and I am trying to e-mail him every day [to show my appreciation]."
Showing appreciation almost certainly helps spouses as they take on all the daily household tasks on their own.
David is keeping things in order back home with their two daughters, Kayla, 11, and Elisabeth, 18, while his wife is deployed to Iraq. This is the first time she has been away from her family for an extended period and David has had to learn some new techniques to manage this increased reasonability.
"Priorities," he said. "I have to manage it all alone, and I keep it all smooth [by] setting priorities."
To help alleviate the stress of dealing with the responsibilities alone, neighbors, Becky and Marty Bonnell, have been there to support David. The Bonnell's take Kayla out to the movies or do "mother-daughter" type activities Helen's absence.
Balancing children, maintaining a full-time job as a warehouse supervisor, cooking dinner and making time for his wife already consumed a normal day for David. Now, he must accomplish all his wife's duties as well.
"There are a lot of role reversals after having been married for almost 20 years," Helen said. "He's relied on me to do a lot of this stuff. He's always let me handle the grocery shopping, or he does the outside housework while I did the inside housework."
In preparation for her deployment, Helen taught her husband the basic skills needed to do her share of the chores. On-line bill paying was one of a few important tasks transferred between the two.
David had to take on much more, listing his additional duties as "My kids, laundry, cooking, grocery shopping, household shopping, mail, bills, yard work and a full-time job, just to mention a few."
Helen has a new-found appreciation for her husband's support and willingness to care for their family.
"I would like to let my husband know that he is doing a terrific job taking care of everything," she said.
"I appreciate her support," said David. "I do everything I can to keep things running smooth so she can focus on her mission."
Helen feels all spouses are doing an "amazing job" in their partners' absence by taking care of children, pets, bills and keeping up with the house.
"They are just doing a terrific job taking on all of this - the extra stuff that their spouses normally handle when they are there," she said.
Sgt. 1st Class Helen Foster, Division Special Troops Battalion, 3rd Infantry Division, poses next to her family photos while deployed to Contingency Operating Base Speicher, Tikrit, Iraq, April 28, 2010.
U.S. Army photo by Spc. Jessica Rohr.
God bless our troops, their families (and especially the spouses!), our allies and all their collective loved ones.
May they be under God’s ever watchful and loving eye and the wings of their guardian angels.
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