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Well done, Iowahawk!
Stuck it to him.
Reads like this young woman sounds...
What is it called when farce catches up to reality?
That’s where we now are.
For background, look here:
This is absolutely fantastic!
Is this satire? The entry from Mr. Klein seems entirely plausible, especially the footnotes.
It’s not from the Onion. Is this satire or not?
I’d be interested in reading the losing entries as well.
To delve deeply into the Constitution is an exciting adventure. In depth analysis of the Constitution can be an enriching experience. While it has been acknowledged that it has an important part to play in the development of man, the Constitution is featuring more and more in the ideals of the young and upwardly mobile. It is estimated that that the Constitution is thought about eight times every day by those politicaly minded individuals living in the past, who just don't like that sort of thing. Complex though it is I shall now attempt to provide an exaustive report on the Constitution and its numerous 'industries'.
Society is a simple word with a very complex definition. When Thucictholous said 'people only know one thing'  he borrowed much from the Constitution. A society without the Constitution is like a society without knowledge, in that it helps to provide some sort of equilibrium in this world of ever changing, always yearning chaos.
Our post-literate society, more than ever before, relies upon the Constitution. It is intrinsically linked to adolescent inner acclimatisation.
The dictionary defines economics as 'the social science concerned with the production, distribution, exchange, and consumption of goods and services'. We shall examine the Fish-Out-Of-Water model, making allowances for recent changes in interest rates.
What a splendid graph. Clearly oil prices looms over the Constitution this cannot be a coincidence. What it all comes down to is money. Capitalists love the Constitution.
The media have made politics quite a spectacle. Contrasting the numerous political activists campaigning for the interests of the Constitution can be like looking at the two sides of the Constitution.
Consider this, spoken at the tender age of 14 by one of the great political analysts Bonaventure B. Adger 'Taking a walk across hot coals will inevitably hurt your feet.'  I couldn't have put it better my self. When it comes to the Constitution this is clearly true. It would be wise to approach the subject with the thought that 'if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all'. However this can lead to missing out important facts. Since the Renaissance the Constitution has become more and more prevalent. May it continue.
We can say with certainty the Constitution has, and will continue to be a major building block for the world in which we live. It questions, provides financial security, though the Constitution brings with it obvious difficulties, it is truly the Constitution.
Let's finish with a thought from star Keanu Morissette: 'You win some, you loose some, but the Constitution wins most often.' 
 Thucictholous - Man - Published 42 AD
 Adger - Politics Per Day - 2000 Jinder Publishing
 Sham Magazine - Issue 124 - Monkey Books
Happy new year’s Adam, ES. Great post.
(btw... Adam came before Eve)