Police banned 'eggs is eggs' in case it offended infertile women

Daily Telegraph ^ | January 1, 2011 | John Bingham

[Cincinatus' Wife]

Writing on a popular online blog, the anonymous whistelblower, said that colleagues in his force had been ordered not to use the expression on “diversity” grounds.

The blogger, who writes under the pseudonym Inspector Gadget, after the cartoon character, is understood to be a serving inspector in a county force in southern England, which he refers to only as “Ruralshire” – “a county in England, not too far from Metrocity”.

[snip]

In his latest posting, he dismissed the alleged ban on the phrase as “another nonsensical, empire-building, silly, frothy, pathetic and downright insulting example of political correctness gone mad”.

"We at Ruralshire Constabulary have been told not to use the term ‘sure as eggs is eggs’,” he wrote.

"Apparently this may upset any women listening, especially those who may suffer from fertility problems.

He insisted: “This is true. Can the department which thought this up be considered for abolition in the forthcoming cuts?

“Apparently not. Here in the Shire, Diversity Training Departments are considered as ‘front-line’ teams.”

[snip]

Infertility support charities said it was possible that women with ovarian problems might be offended by the phrase but questioned whether there had been any genuine cases.

Susan Seenan of the Infertility Network UK, said: “People who are suffering from infertility are going through a very difficult time and sometimes innocuous phrases can make them upset.

“I have certainly not come across anybody claiming that they have been offended by it at all but that is not to say that there are not patients out there who have been offended by it, sometimes it is the innocent remarks which offend.”

The Inspector Gadget blog has had 4.4 million hits since it was set up with around 16,000 visits a month.

[Cincinatus' Wife]

Police Inspector Blog "Doughnuts & Diversity. Ruralshire, England 2011

[Cincinatus' Wife]

Idiom Definitions for ‘Sure as eggs is eggs’
These (sic) means absolutely certain, and we do say ‘is’ even though it is grammatically wrong.

http://www.usingenglish.com/reference/idioms/sure+as+eggs+is+eggs.html

[alexander_busek]

May I suggest an alternative phrase?

"As sure as suicide-bombers is Muslims."

Regards,

[R. Scott]

Merry Old England – less and less merry.

[muawiyah]

In societies with indeterminant infertility (men and women who are infertile for no discernible reason) there are also men with extraordinary potency.

A high degree of male potency appears to be associated with what might well be termed "super sperm". It is frequently the case that even women with indeterminant infertility can be impregnated successfully by men with "super sperm."

Something for the police in England to think about Fur Shur.

[Lazamataz]

The letter 'a' reminds me of a horrible tragedy I experienced once.

Englnd needs to cut out the use of the letter 'a'. Gret Britin will never notice the lass.

[Tax-chick]

Hppy New Yer, Lz.

[Dumpster Baby]

I'm offended by references to "man" and "woman" as it discriminates. The only proper reference might be "person", but even that is discriminatory against the rest of the animal kingdom. Perhaps "entity" would be the only non-discriminatory label, providing that the use of a label at all does not offend.

;^)

[Moltke]

Susan Seenan of the Infertility Network UK, said: “People who are suffering from infertility are going through a very difficult time and sometimes innocuous phrases can make them upset.

Go suck an egg, Susan. Oh, sorry about that. Hope I didn't hurt your feelings!

[numberonepal]

The letter 'a' reminds me of a horrible tragedy I experienced once.

Check out a book called Ella Minnow Pea by Mark Dunn. It shows collectivist absurdity in a similar manner to the above.

[6SJ7]

“I have certainly not come across anybody claiming that they have been offended by it at all but that is not to say that there are not patients out there who have been offended by it, sometimes it is the innocent remarks which offend.”

I'm offended by people making remarks about supposedly offending statements without even having an actual offended party to which to point.

[School of Rational Thought]

Also banned is the phrase “... the forest through the trees” as it might upset men with erectile dysfunction.

[sand lake bar]

Also...”it left a bad taste in my mouth” because it could offend gays.

[School of Rational Thought]

“it” has a also been banned to prevent offending who are having a problem with “it”

[Mrs. Don-o]

Nix on "person" unless preceded by by "perdaughter"

You sexist porcine...

[Dumpster Baby]

Nix on "person" unless preceded by by "perdaughter"

You sexist porcine...

You see, that's why it's questionable, and "entity" might be better.

[Lazamataz]

You see, that's why it's questionable, and "entity" might be better

Entity won't work. An entity is something that has a distinct, separate existence, and this would discriminate against those people who have NO distinction or shared existence.

[ozzymandus]

Sometimes those Limeys just make me shake my head in disgust. What a whipped nation.

[dfwgator]

I only knew that expression from the name of the last section of Genesis’ “Suppers Ready.”

[668 - Neighbor of the Beast]

Ella Minnow Pea? Thanks for the tip! Here’s a couple of other good ones:

http://www.amazon.com/Mots-dHeures-Luis-dAntin-Rooten/dp/0140057307

http://www.amazon.com/NHeures-Souris-Rames-Castle-Manuscript/dp/0517540819/ref=pd_sim_b_1

By and for folks with lots of time on their hands!