Skip to comments.Iím Howie, and Iím a Kennedy-holic
Posted on 01/21/2011 12:43:26 AM PST by raccoonradio
As he left office this week, California Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger confessed that he had become addicted to power.
Now its time for my confession, about the Terminators in-laws, the Kennedy family: I have been addicted to them for years.
Whenever I needed a quick column, or an incoherent sound bite, I knew where to turn. Weathers turning cold? Head south, to cover a Kennedy rape trial in Palm Beach. Want a free summer vacation on the Vineyard? Rent the party cottage on Chappaquiddick and broadcast from the scene of the crime.
So Im begging you, Ted Kennedy Jr., please, for the sake of Americas tabloids, run for Joe Liebermans Senate seat in Connecticut.
The Kennedy era ended, at least temporarily, last Friday night, not with a bang but a whimper. The last of the line, retiring Rep. Patches Kennedy of Rhode Island, appeared on Nightline, or as ex-Rep. Joe Early used to call it, in true Kennedy-esque fashion, Nightlife.
Patches was asked about the Tucson shootings, and he had the usual Democrat talking or in his case, stumbling points.
This is the culmination of something that was brewing.
Brewing bad choice of words for you, Patches, given your history of bad-ice-cube ingestion.
As you know, Patches uncle Jack wanted to explore outer space. Patches is into inner space.
The moon shot to the mind we gotta do it.
Is the moon shot to the mind anything like a Jell-O shot? But Patches was already reminiscing about his old man, the Hero of Chappaquiddick.
When his light shined on me alone, there was no better feeling in the world.
So Patches, when your dads light shined on you, were you . . . lit? That led the interviewer to ask Patches about some enchanted evening on Capitol Hill when he claimed he was on his way to a vote in the House, at 2:30 a.m. He had gobbled a couple of Ambien and then headed out for last call.
I dont recall much about that night.
Patches could say the same about most of his evenings, I daresay.
Now, retired at age 42, Patches circled back around to how the threat of violence is allegedly driving his ex-colleagues out of politics. It steals from democracy.
Kinda like what Uncle Jack and the Democrats did in Illinois in the 1960 presidential election, right?
Then the six-minute interview was over, and I knew there was not a drop left in the pantry. The Kennedy columns are over, at least for a year or so, until Teddy Jr. gets up and running.
God grant me the serenity to search for another rich, trashy family thatll provide me with as much easy copy as the Kennedys have.
And the wisdom to know that Ill probably never be able to find anyone who can even come close to them in terms of bad behavior and rampant buffoonery.
And for that, to quote Joe Kennedy, Im sorry, so very very sorry.
Howie list ping
From Howie’s broadcast from the “party house on Chappaquiddick”, 1994 (back then he was on what was then
WHDH AM 850)
He can use my copyrighted Mombasa Moonbeam sobriquet for you know who, and I'll buy the next time I'm on the Cape.
you’re added, welcome!
Howie still has John Kerry and Teresa to mine for material.
Liveshot just doesn’t have the same kick.
Please add me to the Howie pinglist Rocky. Occasionally I go to the Herald just to read the comments to Howie, he has some real loonie union thug types that can’t resist threatening him when he hits them hard!
Awww, he forgot the Skakel’s.
I didn’t even know there WAS a Ted Kennedy Jr.! Is this the child that had his leg amputated because of cancer??
I met Howie and and his wife and daughter in Wellesley. He gave me two of his books although I’d already read the one about Bulger. Great guy. Kinda guy you’d love to have a beer with and listen to him tell stories. And brother, Howie’s got the scoop and the MA pols!
The Kennedy offspring seem congenitally subpar. That’s as politely as I can approach the issue.
Yep - one and the same. He’s smart and articulate, apparently a good family man. Be afraid, be very afraid: he’s just a far left as the rest of the bunch.
Thank youse for adding me to the list. This will give me the moral support I need to (a) get to meet and talk with Mumbles, (b)continue my world-wide search for Whitey, and (c) get a job on the Pike.