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What happens when mean girls grow up?
The Washington Post ^ | Laura Sessions Stepp

Posted on 02/18/2011 8:15:42 AM PST by SantaLuz

Monika Shreves, a college senior with a petite frame and long, black hair, remembers the first mean girl she met. The girl lived in Shreves's Northern Virginia neighborhood and had the blondest hair and eyelashes Shreves had ever seen.

The two arrived together at Girl Scout camp, and the girl assumed command of the cabin they were to sleep in.

"This is the cool cabin," she told the other girls who wandered into the campsite, looking for a place to throw down their stuff. She'd size up each girl. "You can come in," she'd tell one. "You cannot," she'd tell another.

Shreves and her friends started referring to the girl privately as "the devil child." That same year, Shreves's mom, Christine, was driving Shreves, the blond girl and another girl home from school. All three were in the back seat of the car.

As the car swung into their neighborhood, the blond girl turned to the other girl and asked, "Who would you rather go home with? Me or Monika?"

"You," the other girl said.

Shreves burst into tears.

(Excerpt) Read more at washingtonpost.com ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Philosophy
KEYWORDS: bullies; bully; bullying; education; highschool; homeschool; moralabsolutes
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Looks like schools who mass immature, inadequately prepared, same-aged children into little supervised confines need to work on their socialization issues. My wife, who home schools our children, points out she rarely, if ever sees bullying amongst the many home school girls she encounters. Usually they are given compliments on their behavior. Thankfully our girls included. Human nature is the same for all girls. The difference is public schools breed bullying and contempt of peers, and the dilution home values.
1 posted on 02/18/2011 8:15:47 AM PST by SantaLuz
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Comment #2 Removed by Moderator

To: SantaLuz

In the summer I work with large numbers of teen girls (Camp environment) - you can spot the home-schooled girls within minutes.

Yes, there is that big a difference.


3 posted on 02/18/2011 8:22:35 AM PST by ASOC (What are you doing now that Mexico has become OUR Chechnya?)
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To: SantaLuz

“What happens when mean girls grow up?”

Pelosi

H. Thomas

Hillary

M. 000bamy

Behar

etc

etc..


4 posted on 02/18/2011 8:23:29 AM PST by fishtank (The denial of original sin is the root of liberalism.)
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To: SantaLuz

5 posted on 02/18/2011 8:26:34 AM PST by paulycy (Islamo-Marxism is Evil.)
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To: SantaLuz

I have also noticed the difference between public school and home school kids. Public school breeds a sense of discrimination between grades. Where kids in public school will not play with kids in a younger grade (because he’s a 4th grader) homeschool kids seem to have no barrier to age, or sex really.


6 posted on 02/18/2011 8:26:45 AM PST by Walkingfeather
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To: Wilum

SHE’S more stupid than mean.... though what does it matter if you are THAT stupid?


7 posted on 02/18/2011 8:27:24 AM PST by SMARTY (Conforming to non-conformity is conforming just the same.)
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To: SantaLuz

I’m a school crossing guard, but I also homeschool my girls.
One day, a girl who is a friend of my younger daughter came to me.
She said, “Can I ask you something Ms. B?”

She proceeded to break down in tears and tell me that a girl had been picking on her. Her mother told her to “man up” and deal with it. She is sweet, cute and fun to be around. She was begging for help.

I told her that she is wonderful and that she is welcome at my house anytime. If the girl bothered her when I was around, just come to me.

Then I thanked God that I homeschool and vowed NEVER to put my kids in that “Lord of the Flies” atmosphere.


8 posted on 02/18/2011 8:31:03 AM PST by netmilsmom (Happiness is a choice.)
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To: fishtank

Shirley Jackass Lee, Barbra Streisand, Kathleen Parker, and Rahm Emmanuel are mean girls.


9 posted on 02/18/2011 8:34:33 AM PST by juliej
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To: SantaLuz

I see the point. In public schools, private less so; children are subjected to emotional torment that does little to prepare them for the future.

I was bullied in junior high school as were millions of my peers. I can’t say that the experience prepared me for anything I faced since. I suppose if I were to hang out in seedy bars, I would be better prepared; but I never did. The bullying experience caused me and my parents torment for nothing.


10 posted on 02/18/2011 8:35:15 AM PST by cicero2k
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To: SMARTY
I know, you're right, but she just jumped out at me in my mind while I was reading the headline, yuk.
11 posted on 02/18/2011 8:35:36 AM PST by Wilum (Never loaded a nuke I didn't like)
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To: SantaLuz

Interesting take, but I think it goes beyond that. My experience (and for some reason this applies more to women than men) is that people raised in a one-child household tend to be seriously lacking in social development even as adults.


12 posted on 02/18/2011 8:39:57 AM PST by Alberta's Child ("If you touch my junk, I'm gonna have you arrested.")
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To: ASOC

“...you can spot the home-schooled girls within minutes.

Yes, there is that big a difference.”

I used to coach youth baseball.

I don’t think we had any home-schooled kids, but you could immediately tell the parochial school kids apart from the public school kids: the parochial school kids had much better language skills, better self-control at frustrating calls by the umpire, and yes, they spit a whole lot less!

(I hate the habit of spitting among athletes at all levels!)


13 posted on 02/18/2011 8:40:28 AM PST by paterfamilias
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To: netmilsmom

Are you not aware that home school kids miss out on learning those invaluable socialization skills that they can only get from public schools?

At least, that’s the line I always hear from those who are against home schooling. Usually, the same people so worried about kids missing out on learning to socialize are completely blasé about the bullying that too many kids have to endure while “learning to socialize.” As if being victimized by bullies leads to better social skills.

As far as I’m concerned, public schools are a form of institutionalized child abuse. I wish I had home schooled my son.


14 posted on 02/18/2011 8:43:03 AM PST by exDemMom (Now that I've finally accepted that I'm living a bad hair life, I'm more at peace with the world.)
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To: cicero2k
I suppose if I were to hang out in seedy bars, I would be better prepared; but I never did.

Not even there (I've seen more than my share). I often work with the rougher elements of society, and civilized adults just don't act like that.

The only environment I could think of where the experience might apply is prison.

15 posted on 02/18/2011 8:43:26 AM PST by South Hawthorne (In Memory of my Dear Friend Henry Lee II)
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To: SantaLuz

I saw my that my sweet daughter had the makings to become a “mean” girl in pre-school. She went from being kind and eager to please to in command of their small class (only 3 girls and 9 boys). It was one of many factors that led us to homeschool.

I am happy to say that after 3 years we rarely see her “attitude” and she is once again kind to others.


16 posted on 02/18/2011 8:43:49 AM PST by Spudx7
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To: cicero2k
This horrible PC sterotyping of blondes as mean girls really PISSES ME OFF ! ! !

The first words out of the author's mouth are about HAIR COLOR.

Hitler had dark hair, as did Mao, Lenin, Marx, Obama, Pol Pot, and essentially every other criminally insane person known.

You see the "blonde bitch" cliche EVERYWHERE, and it is B.S. Except in the case of Hillary clinton...

17 posted on 02/18/2011 8:45:37 AM PST by Huebolt (It's not over until there is not ONE DEMOCRAT HOLDING OFFICE ANYWHERE. Not even a dog catcher!)
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To: SantaLuz
The difference is public schools breed bullying and contempt of peers, and the dilution home values.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

If children are housed in prison-like building and in most ways treated like prisoners, why are we, as a society, surprised when we see prison pathology in children?

Huh?

The typical Prussian-style school is a cesspool of social dysfunction. Thankfully, humans are resilient and most of us to move on to having healthy relationships among family, friends, and neighbors. Sadly, some are permanently damaged.

18 posted on 02/18/2011 8:46:11 AM PST by wintertime
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To: Huebolt

The hair color angle was lost on me. Blonde women are disparaged as being dumb and mean. On the otherhand it’s beautiful, they get more notice. Even long straight grey hair I find attractive.


19 posted on 02/18/2011 8:51:02 AM PST by cicero2k
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To: SantaLuz

I recently went to my 30th high school reunion. Most of the people who showed up were the mean girls. And they were perfectly nice now. Growing up counts for something.

Some don’t grow up though - I went through a nasty experience with some fellow Girl Scout leaders a while back - the whole best-friends-and-you’re-not-it - so much for leadership by example.


20 posted on 02/18/2011 8:53:05 AM PST by heartwood
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