Posted on 03/22/2011 3:50:08 PM PDT by iowamark
Women of a liberated generation wrestle with their eager-to-grow-up daughters—and their own pasts
...In a few years, their attention will turn to the annual ritual of shopping for a prom dress, and by then their fashion tastes will have advanced still more. Having done this now for two years with my own daughter, I continue to be amazed by the plunging necklines, built-in push-up bras, spangles, feathers, slits and peek-a-boos. And try finding a pair of sufficiently "prommish" shoes designed with less than a 2-inch heel...
A woman I know, with two mature daughters, said, "If I could do it again, I wouldn't even have slept with my own husband before marriage. Sex is the most powerful thing there is, and our generation, what did we know?"
We are the first moms in history to have grown up with widely available birth control, the first who didn't have to worry about getting knocked up. We were also the first not only to be free of old-fashioned fears about our reputations but actually pressured by our peers and the wider culture to find our true womanhood in the bedroom. Not all of us are former good-time girls now drowning in regret—I know women of my generation who waited until marriage—but that's certainly the norm among my peers.
So here we are, the feminist and postfeminist and postpill generation. We somehow survived our own teen and college years (except for those who didn't), and now, with the exception of some Mormons, evangelicals and Orthodox Jews, scads of us don't know how to teach our own sons and daughters not to give away their bodies so readily. We're embarrassed, and we don't want to be, God forbid, hypocrites...
(Excerpt) Read more at online.wsj.com ...
“If I could do it again, I wouldn’t even have slept with my own husband before marriage. Sex is the most powerful thing there is, and our generation, what did we know?”
Exactly right
I don't.
I’ll wager that this woman voted for Bill Clinton twice. Isn’t there some Bible verse about reaping and sowing?
I was going to make a pun about raping and blowing, but, I thought better of it...
You can usually find decent (ie, modest) clothing on ebay and bonanza.com. Especially the retro swimsuits, they’re very attractive. Wider choice of styles than you’ll find in most stores, and often better construction too.
The author seems not to understand that the corset was personal torture in the service of generating male lust. Think of it as a Victorian equivalent of 4-inch heels.
That would be impossible. He wouldn't have been your husband before marriage.
“If I could do it again, I wouldn’t even have slept with my own husband before marriage”
Me Neither!
Oooh, thanks! I was able to find some decent clothes for my 11-year-old at Walmart, but my 13-year-old needs adult sizes. Maybe I can find something secondhand for less than new items in the Land’s End catalog.
skanks raising sluts,
who saw that coming?
Oh wait
I see women who are old enough to be grandmothers and dressed like teen age trollops.
Am Vets baby, or Goodwill. I am a convert to the thrift store. Don’t knock it. (Actually, I just got a pair of Land’s End jeans, perfect condition, $5.00)
Never trust anyone over thirty. That was the mantra of the 60’s generation. Now that they are all pushing 60 they find out how really stupid they were.........
I often find clothes at The Salvation Army, but it’s harder to find girls’ items in this area. And you have to keep going back until something right is in stock, unlike ordering from a catalog.
Yes, persistence is the key if want to be a thrift store diva.
My wife and I were shopping in Pennys this weekend. They had hotpants on the rack, apparently back in fashion....
P.S. I have four daughters. Next January 13th, I will have four TEENAGE daughters. They are truly great kids. But good luck with getting them into thrift store threads.
Yep.
Boobs are everywhere! What used to be reserved for the occasional cocktail dress is now everyday wear, even on TV anchors, day and night. What these women don't seem to get is that by making cleavage omnipresent, it becomes . . . well omnipresent. I.e., part of the background. Ho Hum.
Feminists and liberals completely missed the fact that by making sex ubiquitous, to the point of literally shoving it in kids' faces from an early age and 24/7, they would completely empty it, not only of any emotional meaning, but even of any ability to titilate. That is why the constant exposure to pornography, at whatever level, eventually leads to the requirement for more and more perversion to achieve the initial response. It used to be a wondrous thing to -- finally! -- see your loved one's naked body. Now . . . so what. A few decades ago I was travelling in Denmark and amazed at the nude magazine covers that were everywhere, say at newstands at the train station. I asked a Danish friend if people weren't at all concerned about how such constant exposure to sex and nudity (which, essentially, is what we are exposed to in our culture today---women really do often wear very little clothes) might affect the children. My friend's response was something along the lines of "by letting kids see nudity from an early age, they'll be less curious about it and less turned on by it later." Like . . . that's a good thing? Emotionally dulling is a good thing? But that's where we are. It's quaint to think of our mothers saying "leave something to the imagination" -- but how right they were.
For grins I googled "prom dress pictures 2011" and almost all I saw looked pretty classy. A few fell into the slutware category, but a girl would have to be looking for it.
I didn’t let my daughters dress like that-not when they were 2 or 12 or teens. There is something to be said for developing a sense of modesty at an early age.
Oof, God bless you! I have three daughters: one is 20 and wears a Coast Guard uniform (or jeans and a Coast Guard t-shirt); the others are 13 and 11. They’ll wear thrift-store clothes if we can find something that fits, but only The Salvation Army is close, and we don’t have a lot of time to dig through their stock looking for really-small adult items; stock tends toward extra-large!
Yeah, the thrill of the thrift! I love it, my kitchen is mostly furnished with thrift items that I bought for pennies on the dollar.
At one point we gave up and put our daughters in boys jeans.
That’s great advice. At one time there were very few options, but it’s amazing what one can find online.
I wore my brother’s jeans, until the Hips hit me. I couldn’t find any jeans larger than little-girls’ size 8 that weren’t “low-rise.” If Sears doesn’t have them, I’ll have to measure and catalog-shop. They need one pair for camping (although I manage to camp in a dress ...)
Well said.
If you are the father of four teenage daughter, you will have no hair, no money and no liver.
I’ll have four teenage sons at once, eventually. Having four sons under ten has already strained my liver.
In the words of Boomer icon Holden Caulfield: Sleep tight, ya morons!
In 2002 my daughter was getting Confirmed and graduating from 8th grade and needed two modest outfits. We spent virtually an entire day at the local mall searching for ANYTHING! We finally found a dress with spaghetti straps with a jacket and a sweater and skirt combination. I was shocked at how little was available even then that was appropriate. Wish I’d thought about a thrift store then!!
I see women who are old enough to be grandmothers and dressed like teen age trollops.
forgotten man
~~~~~~~~~
Excuse me! I resemble Your remark,
BTW...that’s all I could find at the Thrift Stores!!
/S
Taxc - I had the same problem shopping at Thrift Stores when I lived on the mainland. Here in Hawai’i there’s plenty of small items!!! FUN.
*****************************
My poor father had five daughters. He was a career military man (Navy). We have pictures of us when we were kids wearing party dresses and boy's black, high-top basketball shoes. He was tough.
For one they knew the man wasn’t their husband,
that fornication is wrong, that they wouldn’t have it to do over again.
“what did we know?”, more “what did we care?”. Now it’s buyers remorse.
Because if we don’t let them dress that way, they will kick out ass.
See if there is a Junior League re-sale store in your town. I’ve never been to the one over in Worcester, but I’ve heard they have lovely clothes. I’d think you’d have a good chance of finding Land’s End, or Eddie Bauer clothes there.
...They had hotpants on the rack, apparently back in fashion....
They are called “Daisy Dukes” nowadays, sheesh!
"We", knew better, that's what we knew.
My kids had better be well prepared if they want to kick my ass. They need to sleep sometime, and after 33 years in the Army, I can go a long time without sleep.
I asked a Danish friend if people weren’t at all concerned about how such constant exposure to sex and nudity (which, essentially, is what we are exposed to in our culture today-—women really do often wear very little clothes) might affect the children. My friend’s response was something along the lines of “by letting kids see nudity from an early age, they’ll be less curious about it and less turned on by it later.” Like . . . that’s a good thing? Emotionally dulling is a good thing?
*******
#183 on the list = Denmark
http://www.indexmundi.com/g/r.aspx?c=da&v=25
The USA is at #153, and the Red States are what keep that high.
Hubby and I were discussing this while watching "Red Eye" the other night. One of the usual lady guests was on, and she must have been going out on the town right after that taping, because she was wearing a dress with the most decolletage I've ever seen on a chat show. Hubby asked if I thought it looked a little slutty, and I said that was par for the course for cocktail and formal wear these days. I wouldn't wear it, but you're hard put to find a dress for a woman, for a formal occasion, without that kind of neckline. The only exception might be "Mother of the Bride or Groom" dresses, but even some of those get a little risque, in my opinion!
But I've also noticed that many news anchorettes wear tops that are WAY too low for my taste. I can see how guys might have a hard time paying attention to what they're saying! I've even seen women at banks and in ostensibly professional positions dressed like that. It is UN-professional, as far as I'm concerned.
Thank you for your service, FRiend.
Old Navy has high-rise (”classic fit”) jeans for women. They appear to have non-low-rise jeans for girls on their website.
My only little girl (asfter 3 boys) in still in my belly and dressed just fine for now... But I am going to have to keep talking to her about tsnius (modesty) from age 3 on, how she has to dress, because it’s going to be so tempting for her to dress like her friends...
A huge, huge point in the article is how none of the adult women EVER wished that they had spent MORE time experimenting with sex when they were younger. This is a VERY important point to tell young girls. Mostly they will later REGRET all those crazy things. Nearly every girl will be attractive to a horny boy. It is NO ACHIEVEMENT on the girl’s part. I don’t think young girls dying to get boys after them know this.
Neither did I.
We have trouble now buying decent clothing for the 6 YO gdaughter. The shorts are mostly Daisy Dukes and shirts show belly and have spaghetti straps, making them look like little hos. For SIX year olds!
Oh, excellent! I’ll have a look there next time I’m in that area. (The Old Navy is near the PetsMart, a regular destination!)
We’ve lost any sense of modesty or propriety in this country. I see sloppy bare dress even in church. True, God wants us to show up for worship but there is no longer a sense of respect or honor. Is it out of ignorance or just not caring?
Take a look at the People of Walmart site to see what I mean. Or the so-called “First Lady.” We’ve lost our minds.
There is one! It’s uptown somewhere, but I could plan a visit there along with a trip to the Boy Scouts store.
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