Posted on 06/05/2011 7:50:41 PM PDT by surroundedbyblue
This is beyond a doubt. My Mom had been a vocal, confessing Christian for years. That's why I say I have an abiding comfort, but am only troubled by thinking of some of Hospice's procedures. The pros overall certainly outweigh the cons since my Mom is in a far better place than I at the moment.
You seem to have a very healthy view of eternal realities as well. This comes through clearly.
“Any patient who is mentally competent can refuse all treatment at any time. “
True, but if you refuse treatment, they say you are acting “Against Medical Advice” and your insurance stops insuring you.
Spouse wanted to go home when they couldn’t figure out why he kept bleeding. They kept poking him there and testing him here, it was driving him crazy. He wanted to go home. Was threatening and blustering. I wanted him to stay until they figured out what was wrong.
It wasn’t until he was told he could leave but would lose his insurance coverage for Acting Against Medical Advice that he decided to stay put. Good thing, too, he had a blood cancer which they finally discovered (and treated).
Interesting even that old hymn...about crossing “over” to the other side, came into play. I think in ‘the dying process’ THAT IS the journey of death, and why so many bizarre and unexpected things are said or happen as people go thru that process..... But once the last breath is gone...they are immediately home. I saw that in my mothers face when I cried out to her to let go and that I would see her again very soon....and she did just that as a peace came over her then...and she slipped away.
But those few moments before were not pretty to see as she fought to push back from leaving. Hardly imaginable to see the physical strength she had then...but she did...and I was not at all prepared for that visual reality. Thus crying out to her to let go and assure her we'd soon see one another again. And this with tears streaming down my face. Hard moment for us both.
So you see death takes us home in very different ways...it was never intended to be pretty or comfortable...but medicine has helped to make it far more tolerable than it would be without...and this my surgeon had some stories about, when he's been on emergency call.. and there is no time for medicine to take hold before they die. He has seen people leave without any comfort at all...and shared these with me.
Am so glad to here your mom knew the Lord. That alone should be a great comfort to you of course. The residual affects you have in how you see Hospice will fade with time I think. Might be good to speak with the head of their organization or close to...who surely has some idea of why they do what they do.
assure her we'd soon see one another again
Nice thoughts.
Good night to you and God bless.
If further treatment isn't going to improve the situation, a time comes where you have to consider quality of life in the remaining days or wasting scarce resources on a fools errand.
For about fifteen years I was a direct pay health care customer. No government largess, no employer involvement, just me paying my provider for coverage.
That ended this year because the premiums got too high. Customers like me were where providers went to make up for discounts handed out employer 'group health plans' and Medicare reimbursements.
I was asked for nearly $600 per month in 2011. A relative's family of five pays just $17 under a public employee group health plan. Identical coverage, provider and clinic. If they were direct pay customers their premiums would be thousands per month.
While I've not needed a doctor in over 5 years, that family of five includes a range of chronic health problems. Someone has to subsidize their care and the care of thousands, even millions of others.
I realized this year just how foolish I was to be personally and directly responsible for my own health care. I was a sucker, robbed blind because I wasn't gaming the system.
More people need to feel the actual cost of their healthcare decisions and stop treating the system like an endless resource. They are thieves driving up the cost for everyone and pricing too many out of even basic medical care. That's inhumane and selfish. Adults need to face the certainty that is their own mortality.
You act as if every human being should get whatever medical treatment exists, costs be damned, sky's the limit. It's madness.
Absolutely true and I've made my wishes clear along those same lines.
That is what my mom opted for, they said chemo might buy her a few months. She chose to do nothing, and when it got bad, she went on Hospice Care. They kept her comfortable as possible with the pain.
Every one should have a living will, and have it on file with your doctor, as well as letting your family know your wishes.
I never take leftist arguments/ideas at face value.
I look behind their argument to their agenda, and I always, rightly, assume their agenda to be malicious.
They are setting us up at the top of a very slippery slope that goes from
“allowing” someone to deny aggressive treatment by denying the hospital the ability to “force” it on someone,
to encouraging someone to deny aggressive treatment
to setting up a “duty to die” zeitgeist
to making it a matter of law to “kill granny” to save resources.
This is of course when one, and the family, understand the death process is in motion. I will not take extended treatment and they know this. When you have endured extended treatments in the past you know what might be expected in the affects on your body. Some treatments can be worse than a cure, and only add a few months at best. I’d prefer to live well in my last days...and not going thru treatments which would rob me of my family and quality time with. They understand this.
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Yes, I am an anesthesiologist, and am old enough to have used Ethrane during training.
Um, did you flunk basic reading comprehension, because at no point I “act as if every human being should get whatever medical treatment exists, costs be damned, sky’s the limit”. I posted this thread to illustrate the insidious way the media is slowly convincing us that we have a duty to die when someone (insurance, hospitals, doctors, etc) deem that it’s our time.
You are the one who seems bitter. And judging by your comment about gaming the system, it seems that you would be the one who is part of the problem.
What’s with all the pro-death trolls around here? I thought JR made it pretty clear that FR is a PRO-LIFE forum.
most of us actually recommend a palliative approach for the dying, or for those with “multisystem failure” where everything is slowly going, and you know if you fix one problem another one will crash.
This is not the same as euthanasia, because I’ve seen such patients recover and do well for another few months, and they are a lot more comfortable.
The real problem is when we have a person who could recover or live for months with aggressive treatment...then he ends up dying and we are the bad guys.
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