Barack is playing golf in Scotland. He keeps slicing his drives to the left (he is a lefty) on every hole. So he asks his Scottish caddie what is wrong with his swing.
The caddie answers “There is shyt at the end of your driver”
Barack starts to clean the head of his driver with a towel.
The caddie says “It’s on the other end”.
-If you elect me, ah...I'll give you free healthcare!
All the braves in unison shout out: Hoya, hoya!!
-and new schools for the papooses!
-uh...I'll even build you a casino
After the speech, Barack's walking around with the chief and says: you have some fine cattle in this corral, may I inspect them?
The chief answers: you go look, but be careful you don't step in them hoya.