One further thought. If they won’t help themselves, how are their family members ‘supposed’ to help them?
Same thing as a drug addict.
One more thought. Why didn’t the mother call for help? I’m rotting and stuck in a chair....
“... how are their family members suppose to help them?”
Many areas have adult services (like social services for children... adult services cater to adults). If a family member is refusing all help, a call to them will cover any sort of liability later. I understand completely what you are saying with respect to the relative who is demanding to live like he is (soiled, dirty, etc). Adult services can interview the person and possibly place them in another environment. Just a thought.
I had a similar, though not as bad experience with my father his last few years. Still, as much as I loved my father, and as much as I miss him now, I wasn’t sad when he passed.
Try as you might, you cannot help someone who does not want to help them self.