Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

Night of the evil Butterball(MA)
Gun Rights Examiner | 24 November, 2011 | David Codrea

Posted on 11/25/2011 5:28:49 AM PST by marktwain

This is my traditional Thanksgiving essay from The War on Guns.

Attacks by roving flocks of wild turkeys are on the increase around suburban Boston--AP

Time was, the turkey was considered a game bird. The Pilgrims at Plymouth feasted on them. Generations later, Ben Franklin considered it such a useful fowl that he nominated it for the national bird.

Of course, this was in the days when the right to bear arms was taken for granted, when free people hunted turkeys for sustenance, all the while honing marksmanship that would serve them well in time of need.

Fast-forward to present-day Boston, a place of sacred tradition, the literal forge for our heritage of individual liberty. Except Boston is now a place where traditions have been betrayed. Its current overlords have succeeded in disarming the whole people in a way that General Gage could never have conceived possible.

So successful have these rulers been that the city that gave us Sam Adams and Paul Revere is now a city under siege, and this is fittingly ironic if you think about it, by wild turkeys. So helpless and hapless are Boston's modern-day patriots, they can do little except retreat from the aggressive gobblers, escape, hole up and plead for rescue from the very authorities that enforce public impotence.

This is what the heirs of The Sons of Liberty have been reduced to. This is what they have allowed, and in many cases, demanded. Human beings, with dominion over the earth, scurrying from turkeys. The tolerated degradation of the masses is damned near complete.


TOPICS: Constitution/Conservatism; Culture/Society; Philosophy; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: banglist; ma; thanksgiving; turkey
Hard to believe that grown men are reduced to a fear of turkeys. Even as a young boy, I would have taken on turkeys with just a stick, and likley would have brought one home for the family.

Well, history shows that you can take most weepy nervous nellie milktoasts, run them through 6 weeks of training/indoctrination, and make fair killers of them.

1 posted on 11/25/2011 5:28:54 AM PST by marktwain
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: marktwain

We have become a society of wusses, Marktwain. I saw a male neighbor RUN away... literally yelling for help because he saw a little fox. The fox was simply walking through the yards (no aggression or anything) and he RUNS. You should have seen my husband and son laughing at him... tears running down their faces. So, yes, some grown men afraid of a few wild turkeys... doesn’t surprise me at all.


2 posted on 11/25/2011 5:40:35 AM PST by momtothree
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: marktwain
"Scurrying from turkeys"??

Watch When Turkeys Attack — 10 Terrifying Gobblers. You'll be too petrified to ever set foot outside again!

3 posted on 11/25/2011 5:44:03 AM PST by ProtectOurFreedom
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: marktwain
Been scared by game birds twice. Stepped on a pheasnt's tail crossing a cut corn field at night - sudden flapping against the leg does pucker one up for a second. Then, deer hunting up north, snow on ground/trees and saw brown patch moving on other side of big fir tree. Held brath and sidled to one side to try for an angle to see/shoot and suddenly a loud whopping noise (like shaking a 12x12 rug) and snow flying off tree and over me. Had been stalking a turkey instead of a deer.
4 posted on 11/25/2011 6:02:25 AM PST by trebb ("If a man will not work, he should not eat" From 2 Thes 3)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: marktwain
Where's the Swedish Chef when you need him? Bork Bork...
5 posted on 11/25/2011 6:05:04 AM PST by jakerobins
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: marktwain
Coming Horror film Turkey Terror. Your recommendations for stars, I know, I know, your gonna say Obummer and the Wookie.

May compete with all the Japanese Godzilla films.

6 posted on 11/25/2011 6:09:42 AM PST by SandRat (Duty - Honor - Country! What else needs said?)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: trebb
Sudden startlement doesn't reach the level of milktoast fear. I suspect that you are quite capable of taking care of your self. Most hunters are only a few steps off of being decent insurgents/partisans.
7 posted on 11/25/2011 6:22:29 AM PST by marktwain (In an age of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: marktwain

Is there a link to the rest of the story?

I wholeheartedly agree with you about the ‘pussification’ of the American male.

However, wrestling with a wild turkey may not be such a good idea. A friend of mine nearly lost his German Shorthair when he sicced him on a large Tom. $400 in vet bills to sew him back together. The poor dog was spurred from head to toe.

Turkey’s are tougher than you’d think.


8 posted on 11/25/2011 6:30:14 AM PST by panaxanax (0bama >>WORST PRESIDENT EVER.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: panaxanax
Turkey’s are tougher than you’d think.

That is why I specified that I would use a stick. It is best to use a weapon instead of bare hands and feet. As you say, they are tough enough to do you some damage.

I think that the author, David Codrea, is also making this point.

9 posted on 11/25/2011 6:45:24 AM PST by marktwain (In an age of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: marktwain

you might want to check those programs ... you’ll find they are a pale example of what they were. no more ‘break them down to build them up’ thanks to bjclinton


10 posted on 11/25/2011 7:00:05 AM PST by sten (fighting tyranny never goes out of style)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: marktwain

During Army basic training, we were given M16s, compasses, and maps, and told to find our way through the woods. Our instructors also warned us that the woods were home to turkeys and wild pigs, both of which could be dangerous.

I ran across a turkey. At that point, it occurred to me that some ammo for the M16 might have been nice to have. I guess I could have used the M16 as a club had it attacked...

Later on, I told my fellow trainees that if it weren’t for the lack of ammo, we could have been having fresh turkey instead of MREs for dinner.


11 posted on 11/25/2011 7:20:10 AM PST by exDemMom (Now that I've finally accepted that I'm living a bad hair life, I'm more at peace with the world.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: marktwain

They’re emboldened because they’re not being hunted. There is a large and growing population here, too, but they run away from people, for the most part. My mom has close to twenty that wander up across the fields and into her yard, and they’ll flee if they even see her in a window. They’re not exactly beautiful birds. The Toms can be sort of showy, but they’re the ones that are most likely to come after you if provoked, lol.


12 posted on 11/25/2011 7:26:42 AM PST by RegulatorCountry
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: panaxanax

Thats why they invented the shotgun. LOL!!!


13 posted on 11/25/2011 7:29:47 AM PST by Georgia Girl 2 (The only purpose of a pistol is to fight your way back to the rifle you should never have dropped.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: marktwain

If you can get close enough to a turkey to wack the turkey with a stick you should be a hunting guide. Wild turkeys are as wary as any animal in N America. Dumb but wary.


14 posted on 11/25/2011 7:31:01 AM PST by Oystir
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 9 | View Replies]

To: marktwain
Well a lot of people like to come to these kind of threads to laugh at the hapless city slickers who are intimidated by wildlife and yap about what manly men they are and how when they were little boys, they could take a turkey with their bare hands.

Well hunting the fowl is the easy part. Even a small girl or an old grandmother could hunt down a turkey for the family dinner. Nothing particularly manly in that. If you want to show off how manly you are, go build a wood fence, splitting your own rails and digging your own posts.

The hard part about getting a wild turkey on the dinner table is skinning and dressing it. That's where fun romping in the woods turns into hard work and most men who brag about killing the turkey will have nothing to do with it.

15 posted on 11/25/2011 7:47:54 AM PST by SamAdams76 (Herman Cain 2012)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: SamAdams76
The story has nothing to do with hunting turkeys, but rather about the pathetic people who have been so wussified as to become frightened of them. They need to grow a spine, before they are made prey of boy tougher folk.

I did not work to be at the top of the food chain only to meekly give up the position. I recall Dwight Eisenhower writing about how he was intimidated by aggressive domestic geese when he was a small boy, and how he was told to take a stick to them. He was the one to be feared by the fowl after that.

16 posted on 11/25/2011 8:15:18 AM PST by marktwain (In an age of universal deceit, telling the truth is a revolutionary act.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 15 | View Replies]

To: marktwain

Understood but my reply was in response to those who come to brag about how they bagged a turkey when they were 9-years-old and still in short pants.


17 posted on 11/25/2011 8:21:04 AM PST by SamAdams76 (Herman Cain 2012)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 16 | View Replies]

To: marktwain

Toms can be mean birds at times. People can get hurt by their talons. Because of that, I’m quite willing to take my Mossberg and a turkey license and save the day if they are bothering someone on their property. :)

I’ll even remove the turkey from the premises.


18 posted on 11/25/2011 8:28:12 AM PST by Darren McCarty (Anybody but Romney or Obama)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: momtothree
The fox was simply walking through the yards (no aggression or anything) and he RUNS.

Cityfolk..... I'd be laughing too. A fox? Not even a coyote? I may run for my gun or a hockey stick if the fox showed aggression at me (rabies) but just standing there in the yard? Bwahaha. I'd only be that petrified of a fox if I was a rabbit.

19 posted on 11/25/2011 8:41:45 AM PST by Darren McCarty (Anybody but Romney or Obama)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: momtothree

Over the last 10 years I have seen large numbers of incidents that made the news which could have been solved quietly with a cheap pellet gun.

I am amazed at how pussified many of our men have become.


20 posted on 11/25/2011 8:42:52 AM PST by buffaloguy
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 2 | View Replies]

To: SamAdams76
I wouldn't mess with a turkey with my bare hands. I'd rather not take a couple dozen stitches or staples trying to break its neck. Most turkeys won't let you get that close to one to begin with unless Tom's very PO'ed for some reason. Cleaning them's a pain, but the wild turkey dinner is well worth it.

Rules are slightly different in suburbia, but that's more do with those who feed them, eliminating Tom, Jake, and Hen's fear of people. That's also where you have the aggression, and fear of them.

21 posted on 11/25/2011 8:53:50 AM PST by Darren McCarty (Anybody but Romney or Obama)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 15 | View Replies]

To: Oystir

I disagree about turkeys being wary but dumb, at least here in the People’s Republic of Massachusetts. They don’t seem to be particularly concerned about getting out of the way of cars as they amble across the street, and don’t often flee from leashed or invisible-fence hobbled dogs. I think they’re smart enough to know that, like illegal aliens, they’re a protected class of inhabitants, or at least smart enough to read the signs at my town’s borders saying “Firearm discharge prohibited within town limits.”


22 posted on 11/25/2011 9:16:48 AM PST by thanatz
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 14 | View Replies]

To: marktwain
Been blessed by good reflexes, mental and physical. Can usually process initial input and decide whether to jump or to carry on. Comes in useful when things get "exciting". I believe my upbringing in the NRA and a lot of hunting have contributed.

Hope your Thanksgiving was a blessed event.

23 posted on 11/25/2011 12:02:13 PM PST by trebb ("If a man will not work, he should not eat" From 2 Thes 3)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 7 | View Replies]

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson