The Trenton Toilet Paper Shortage

American Thinker ^ | 03/15/2012 | Jeannie DeAngelis

[SeekAndFind]

Presently, there is a crisis afoot in New Jersey that is symbolic of government incompetence and indicative of the fate that awaits every American if ObamaCare is implemented. In Trenton, the Health Department may be forced to shut down city buildings due to a toilet paper shortage. That's right: Trenton is so fiscally squeezed that in city restrooms Charmin® is nowhere to be found. Seems in the city of Trenton the toilet paper and paper towel inventory is depleted in about a dozen buildings, including City Hall. According to Harold Hall, Acting Public Works Director, there are presently only 15 rolls of toilet paper available; after that, lavatory visitors are, shall we say, left to their own devices.

Public Works Director Harold Hall, conveying a potential healthcare reform/bureaucratic logjam warning that should be heeded, said that a "City Council resolution to order more paper supplies, including paper cups, was voted down. According to Harold, some council members didn't think the cash-strapped city needed to buy the cups." That mentality is kind of like Obama saying, 'Give Granny a cheap pain pill and forget the expensive pacemaker.'

Right now in Trenton, it's just toilet paper. What happens when a federally appointed healthcare panel spends precious time discussing whether a "cash-strapped" country can still afford chemotherapy, or long-term dialysis? It's inconvenient when you can't get any toilet paper, but it can be fatal when you run out of health care.

Northward Councilwoman Marge Caldwell-Wilson of Hamilton Township explained the process this way: "Once you bid and give in a contract, you can't remove something from a bid." In which case, to deal with the paper cups the city would have to pull back the original bid, cancel it, and then re-bid for just the toilet paper.

[SeekAndFind]

I can't help but think of the Beatles song : "BACK IN THE USSR", when I read about this.

[television is just wrong]

people are stealing the toilet paper? this is insane with this being the land of unlimited resources. WTF?

[MNDude]

government funded toilet paper makes a lot more sense than birth control. Birth control is optional based on your recreational activities.

[bgill]

Inmates running the asylum.

[SeekAndFind]

RE: people are stealing the toilet paper? this is insane with this being the land of unlimited resources. WTF?

Simple Obama solution to the problem — if you can mandate free contraception, you can mandate free toilet paper.

If Sandra Fluke is the advocate for free contraception, who’s going to be the advocate for free toilet paper?

[rusty schucklefurd]

re: Northward Councilwoman Marge Caldwell-Wilson of Hamilton Township explained the process this way: “Once you bid and give in a contract, you can't remove something from a bid.”

Kind of like the law of the Medes and the Persians?

[MIchaelTArchangel]

There really is not a shortage of toilet paper in Trenton. The problem is the legislature is in session and everyone knows legislators are full of shi’ite.

[Vigilanteman]

The Japanese have this simple solution. They've been using it in public restrooms for years:

For those of you who can't read Japanese, they both dispense "Soft Type" tissue. A decade or two ago, the one on the right dispensed standard type-- you could get more in a packet but it had the general feel of sandpaper.

[Le Chien Rouge]

Maybe the government bureaucrats should heed the advise from their ‘know it all Hollywood entertainers’ and only use one sheet to wipe their Michelle Obama sized caboose.

[samtheman]

Reminds me of the Toilet Paper Memo in SNOW CRASH.

[boomop1]

We must not have a toilet paper gap, General Buck Turgidson.

[exit82]

Now we know the REAL reason Washington crossed the Delaware.

[Fellow Traveler]

Advocate for free toilet paper. We finally found a job for VP Biden.

[Jack Hammer]

Yeah, it simply CANNOT be a coincidence that this same thing used to happen in Russia all the time.

[married21]

Re: stealing toilet paper.

People have been doing that since public restrooms were invented. I read an article on this a few years ago. Offices, stores, etc., have tried the really big toilet paper rolls because they would be too big to use on a home-size toilet paper holder. They have tried the single sheet at a time dispenser, also because you cant grab wads at a time for home use.

People go to great lengths to pry open or otherwise defeat paper towel dispensers to steal the paper.

I think you have privacy and opportunity, and the temptation is there for some people to do something naughty and get away with it. It has nothing to do with how much money they have. It has everything to do with their character.

[ml/nj]

Maybe they should adopt the Jordanian system? During a stopover at the airport in Amman several years ago, my wife reported that when she used the Ladies Room there she was given a single square of toilet paper as she entered.

ML/NJ

[The Great RJ]

Who is the City of Trenton buying their TP from ...Tony Soprano??? Couldn’t the city just fire some faceless bureaucrat and use the inflated salary to buy TP at Sam’s Club or Costco?

[Iron Munro]

This stinks.

[trebb]

If they used toilet paper the way the leftists would have us all use it, in order to save the environment, they woul have plenty:

Take a single sheet and fold in half.
Fold in half again so it's a square again.
Tear off the corner formed by the two folds.
Hold the little piece and open the sheet back up.
The sheet has a hole in the center - put your finger through the hole.
Wipe/clean with the finger.
Wipe the finger off as you remove the sheet.
Use the little piece to clean under the fingernail.

[BigEdLB]