BREAKING NEWS June 14, 2012: The White House today announces the newly-created office of Pimp Bailout Czar.
White House spokesman Jay Carney told the White House press corps: “While President Obama knows the private sector is doing just fine, pimps are being especially hard-hit during these difficult economic times. The Pimp Bailout Czar will distribute $535 million dollars, because after all, Obama inherited this problem from the previous administration”.
News anchors from MSNBC, CBS, ABC and CNN called the President’s plan “brilliant”. Pundit Chris Matthews reported he felt another thrill run up his leg and intended to dine this evening using his Obama Collector Plates purchased at a local swap meet.