I mean ... y'know .... you're right!
In case you hadnt noticed,
it has somehow become uncool to sound like you know what youre talking about?
Or believe strongly in what youre, like, saying?
Invisible question marks and parenthetical (you know?)s- and (you know what Im saying)s
have been attaching themselves to the ends of our sentences?
Even when those sentences arent, like, questions? You know?
Declarative sentences, so-called
because they used to, like, DECLARE things to be true,
as opposed to other things that are, like, totally, you know, not (?)
have been infected by a totally hip and tragically cool interrogative tone?
As if Im saying, dont think Im a nerd just cuz Ive, like, noticed this, okay??
I have nothing personally invested in my own opinions??
Im just, like, inviting you to join me on the bandwagon of my own uncertainty?
What has happened to our conviction?
Where are the limbs out on which we once walked?
Have they been, like, chopped down
with the rest of the rain forest? You know?
Or do we have, like, nothin to say?
Has society become so, like, totally, like, whatever!
That weve become the most aggressively inarticulate culture
to come along since . . .you know, a long, long time ago!
So I entreat you, I implore you, I exhort you:
To speak with conviction.
To say what you believe in a manner that bespeaks the determination with which you believe it.
Because contrary to the wisdom of the bumper sticker,
it is not enough these days to simply
You have to speak with it, too.
My pet peeve is people using your when it should be the contraction you’re. I see you went to a school that taught the difference.