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TERROR in SEATTLE: Gang of violent LEPRECHAUNS on the loose
The Register ^ | 22nd June 2012 12:11 GMT | Joe Fay

Posted on 06/22/2012 10:39:31 AM PDT by null and void

Delays to Windows 8 feared as bearded rampage continues

Seattle is expected to go into lockdown this weekend, as fears grow that a gang of rogue leprechauns is on the loose and attacking locals.

Komonews.com reports that police were called to reports of a street fight [1] last Saturday. When they arrived they saw a number of people run from the scene, before finding a man "covered in blood and holding his head and screaming in pain".

When asked what had happened to him, the distressed victim said "It was a bunch of leprechauns."

The diminutive Irish expatriates had allegedly become enraged because the man was dancing with a girl.

The victim was unable to provide any further distinguishing information about the violent gang, except that one of them was wearing "a white tank top".

After delivering this vital piece of information, the victim was taken to Harborview medical centre with "multiple head injuries and cuts and bruises on his face, back, knuckles and elbows".

The story has now gone viral, putting the fear of God into Seattle, and quite possibly holding up development on Windows 8.

However, it is entirely possible that the case is entirely one of mistaken identity, and El Reg thinks it can point out the real culprits.

Consider the evidence. First of all, leprechauns are supposed to be solitary creatures, wearing beards, hats and coats. Secondly, unlike their larger countrymen they are not renowned for traveling, preferring to stay close to their cobbling clientele and mythical crocks of gold, typically located at the end of a rainbow, somewhere in Ireland.

The Seattle victim in question was assaulted by a gang, at least one of whom was wearing a white tank top. And, as for motive, the gang was enraged when the victim danced with a certain girl.

So, clearly the police should be hunting down a known gang from Southern California, who go by the street names of of Doc, Happy, Bashful, Sneezy, Grumpy, Sleepy, and Dopey. ®


TOPICS: Miscellaneous; US: Washington
KEYWORDS: napl; seattle
Aliens!

(Little Green Men)

1 posted on 06/22/2012 10:39:36 AM PDT by null and void
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To: null and void

LOL the last line floored me !!!!


2 posted on 06/22/2012 10:49:59 AM PDT by Robe (Rome did not create a great empire by talking, they did it by killing all those who opposed them)
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To: null and void

Beware of bearded men with burning eyes....


3 posted on 06/22/2012 11:06:13 AM PDT by alloysteel (Fear and intimidation work. At least on the short term.)
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To: null and void
leprechaun Pictures, Images and Photos
4 posted on 06/22/2012 11:12:15 AM PDT by Snickering Hound
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To: null and void

So are we now supposed to use Leprechauns in place of the usual Amish euphemism? Or only when they’re wearing tank tops instead of hoodies.


5 posted on 06/22/2012 11:13:17 AM PDT by katana (Just my opinions)
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To: null and void

It just goes to show that when you have costumed, crime-fighting heroes in a city, you attract costumed criminals.

See:

“Investigators identified nine people dressed in costume going around Seattle after dark. A police source said the characters go by Thorn, Buster Doe, Green Reaper, Gemini, No Name, Catastrophe, Thunder 88, Penelope and Phoenix Jones the Guardian of Seattle.

But don’t listen to Captain Ozone or Knight Owl, police were told. They’re apparently not part of the group.”

http://www.seattlepi.com/local/article/Police-alerted-to-superheroes-patrolling-Seattle-821425.php#ixzz1yXztG8aj

I always wondered why the Joker or Captain Cold always bothered Gotham City and Central City instead of Denver or Atlanta.


6 posted on 06/22/2012 11:17:27 AM PDT by Dr. Sivana ("You forget, it isn't who you claim, but instead, who claims you. We don't claim you!")
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To: null and void

“It was a bunch of leprechauns.”

When attacked by leprechauns throw a bottle of whiskey to the side. When they make a dive for it,....RUN!


7 posted on 06/22/2012 11:17:53 AM PDT by Ruy Dias de Bivar (I LIKE ART! Click my name. See my web page.)
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To: null and void

By the way, if these are Magic Leprechauns, Superman would have problems with’em. You are better calling out Zantana, Dr. Fate or The Spectre against this kind.


8 posted on 06/22/2012 11:18:37 AM PDT by Dr. Sivana ("You forget, it isn't who you claim, but instead, who claims you. We don't claim you!")
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To: null and void

What’s the real story behind this?


9 posted on 06/22/2012 11:22:06 AM PDT by AZLiberty (No tag today.)
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To: Dr. Sivana
“Investigators identified nine people dressed in costume going around Seattle after dark. A police source said the characters go by Thorn, Buster Doe, Green Reaper, Gemini, No Name, Catastrophe, Thunder 88, Penelope and Phoenix Jones the Guardian of Seattle.

This sounds like the gang from the TV's "The Big Bang Theory" and their friends from the comic book store.

10 posted on 06/22/2012 11:44:17 AM PDT by Bernard Marx
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To: null and void

Pukwudgies!


11 posted on 06/22/2012 11:56:59 AM PDT by dljordan ("Tyranny, like Hell, is not easily conquered.")
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To: null and void; Revolting cat!; Slings and Arrows; JoeProBono
Robert B. Reich PING!


12 posted on 06/22/2012 12:09:28 PM PDT by a fool in paradise (The media ignored the 40th anniversary of Bill Ayers' Pentagon bombing but not Watergate. Ask Why.)
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To: null and void

“They’re always stealin’ me lucky charms.”


13 posted on 06/22/2012 12:11:50 PM PDT by dfwgator
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To: a fool in paradise; MeekOneGOP; Conspiracy Guy; DocRock; King Prout; Darksheare; OSHA; ...
At least no-one slipped him a little green shamrock.


14 posted on 06/22/2012 12:15:22 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows; derllak; Lakeshark; Borax Queen; null and void; nicmarlo; sweetliberty; ...
NOT may fault.
I may be numbered among the Fae, I may be short and skinny and able to dry up cattle and curse crops, but I swear I ain't no leprechaun.
15 posted on 06/22/2012 12:34:25 PM PDT by Darksheare (You will never defeat Bok Choy!)
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To: Lady Jag; Kathy in Alaska

Ping to my standard denial...


16 posted on 06/22/2012 12:36:22 PM PDT by Darksheare (You will never defeat Bok Choy!)
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To: Darksheare

That’s what you said the last time, too.


17 posted on 06/22/2012 12:42:56 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have Ingsoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein.)
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To: Slings and Arrows

Yes.
And I’ve been very good at not cursing cattle and crops lately.


18 posted on 06/22/2012 12:48:12 PM PDT by Darksheare (You will never defeat Bok Choy!)
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To: Darksheare

Sure an’ ye’ll swear to that on a quart of Jameson, me lad? Come over here an’ kiss the book, bedad, before I’m obliged to come over there an’ baptize ye wit’ me lucky shillelagh!

An’ may the good Lord hold ye in the palm of His hand.

While he’s APPLAUDING ye!

;^)


19 posted on 06/22/2012 12:57:32 PM PDT by elcid1970 (Nuke Mecca now. Death to Islam means freedom for all mankind. Deus vult!")
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To: elcid1970

LOL!
Truly I swear it, it weren’t me!


20 posted on 06/22/2012 1:01:37 PM PDT by Darksheare (You will never defeat Bok Choy!)
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To: Darksheare

I did it.
I’m glad I did it.

Given the chance, I’ll do it again just ‘cuz that’s the way I roll.

“Little Lugh O’Mander”


21 posted on 06/22/2012 1:30:21 PM PDT by Salamander (I wanna hurt you just to hear you screaming my name.)
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To: katana; Salamander; Slings and Arrows
"So are we now supposed to use Leprechauns in place of the usual Amish euphemism?"

Euphemism? What euphemism?

We ought to park your unarmed butt in the middle of downtown Nappanee, Indiana on a hot summer night and see if you make it out, eh?



You're going to look pretty silly standing there with just your fists and wits when the buggy whips beak out.

22 posted on 06/22/2012 4:20:35 PM PDT by shibumi (Cover it with gas and set it on fire.)
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Break out ..... that’s BREAK out.

(Amish sabotaged my keyboard! They hate technology!)


23 posted on 06/22/2012 4:26:26 PM PDT by shibumi (Cover it with gas and set it on fire.)
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To: Darksheare

It’s never your fault Darks. :-)


24 posted on 06/22/2012 5:00:08 PM PDT by fanfan (.http://www.ontariolandowners.ca/index.php?p=1_50_Your-Rights)
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