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Happy National Hunting and Fishing Day —and Pass the Bambi Nachos ^ | September 29, 2012 | Humberto Fontova

Posted on 09/29/2012 6:36:26 AM PDT by Kaslin

September 22 marked National Hunting and Fishing Day, which dates from 1972 when President Nixon signed it into law. "I urge all citizens to join with outdoor sportsmen in the wise use of our natural resources and in insuring their proper management for the benefit of future generations," wrote President Nixon at the time.

Alas, nothing was heard from our current President regarding National Hunting and Fishing Day. But then “people who cling to guns” are not particularly popular with this administration.

And speaking of President Nixon’s recommendation, long ago my family found that among the very wisest uses of our natural resources are Bambi Burgers and Bambi Nachos. Even the "Mamma Grizzlies" (and their daughters) get into hunting down here in Bayou country.

Some of us Bayou boys grudgingly admit that females make better deer hunters than males. Trust me here. I've witnessed it time and again. Women, on average, appear more patient than men in most matters. They also pay more attention to detail, and -- seriously, according to medical studies -- spot contrast and movement better than men.

Rather than decry this female advantage, rather than bewail this naturally-decreed unfairness-- rather than stupidly bash my head against this glass-ceiling Mother Nature built against me, I decided to cash in on it. My chum Artie Boudreaux made me a custom deer stand that accommodates both me and my daughter Monica. We were in it the dawn after Halloween last year with the horizon already pink. Daylight seeped slowly into the swamp and the squirrels and birds came alive. It was nice -- cool, but not cold. No bugs.

Monica was still, alert, and vigilant. Wish I could claim the same. First I fidgeted—and by 8:00 I was drowsing. "Wake me if you see something, honey."...Then I dozed off...and dreamed...

... "This is Chris Matthews reporting from Thibodaux, Louisiana. President Obama declared a state of emergency in the Bayou State, where PETA was staging a demonstration against a local deer hunt. PETA's activists followed the hunters into the woods and employed bullhorns to broadcast the teachings of Henry David Thoreau, Leo Tolstoy and Mohandas Gandhi.

"This serves to enlighten the hunters in the ways of vegetarianism and non-violence," explained PETA spokesperson Paul McCartney, "and to frighten off, and thus save, the poor defenseless deer." With his right eye swollen shut and 21 stitches in his mouth, the ex-Beatle's appearance horrified his fans in the press.

"These blokes certainly take hunting seriously," Paul sputtered painfully into a spittle-flecked microphone held by a snuffling Soledad O’Brien."Nothing like this happened in New Jersey. Remember, friends, All You Need is Love!"

"We came in the spirit of Gandhi!" blubbered PETA board member Bill Maher, who nursed a grapefruit-sized ear and several facial welts, "and were met by that of George Patton!" Mr. Maher then collapsed in sobs into the arms of his friend Alec Baldwin, who tottered at his side on crutches.

"Get up - up!" Rachel Maddow and chum Ellen DeGeneres yelled while yanking Maher up by the collar and seizing Alec roughly by the shoulders. "You're lucky we ran those yahoos off!” they snorted at the badly shaken celebrities. “They'd a killed ya -- ya wussies!"

"Meanwhile, at a local tavern, PETA activists Elton John and Brad Pitt attempted to disrupt a cockfight (this barbarity remains legal in this peculiar state of Louisiana) by stepping into the ring itself. "The roosters immediately pounced on us!" stammered a still shaken Elton. "And I don't even eat chicken! And their owners incited them with bloodcurdling whoops and cheers!"

"Elton and Brad’s flailing arms and wild screams were scant protection against the birds' sharp spurs and vicious beaks. Observers report that rather than attempting to help the frantic and terrified victims, the few beer-crazed spectators who hadn't collapsed in hysterics quickly set several more roosters on the hapless celebrities, whose screams "sounded like Lady Gaga sitting on a sea urchin," according to one howling and badly convulsed bar patron" ...

Then I felt something tugging at my shirt ... huh? ... what?... I awoke. "Dad! Dad!" a wide-eyed Monica hissed, pointing toward the left at a patch of briars...Then I saw the tail flick. GEEZUZ! A DEER!

Monica ducked and covered her ears. He was probably eighty yards away, but obscured by too much brush. The head came up and I saw small antlers. Great, he'll be good and tender. I was breathing in gasps. He took another step and his shoulder cleared the tree. BLAM!

"Yaaay!" squealed Monica while high-fiving her still-shaking Dad. "Bambi Nachos tonight!"

TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial
KEYWORDS: fishing; hunting; outdoors; richardnixon

1 posted on 09/29/2012 6:36:35 AM PDT by Kaslin
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To: Kaslin

In 1989 PETA actually advocated following hunters into the woods. Just let them try that in Louisiana and East Texas. Go ahead and join Thibideaux and Boudreaux on the deer lease, PETA preson, and you might get a bonus of a gator hunting tour with Fontenot. Now what to use for gator bait.........

2 posted on 09/29/2012 6:45:00 AM PDT by Fred Hayek (The Democratic Party is the operational wing of CPUSA.)
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To: Kaslin

My nieces, now in their mid-20’s, started hunting with my brother when they were little tykes ... 8 years old or so. They willingly got up at 3 in the morning for the drive to the deer stand and climbed up in it to sit with my brother. They did this for years and got to see all sorts of deer and celebrate with my brother when he had a successful hunt. BTW, they eat what they kill ... venison burgers, roasts, etc. Once the girls were around 12, my dad (their Grandpa) took them to the hunter safety class and took it with them .... they both passed and got their hunting licenses. Both girls have continued to hunt (bow and gun), were on the sporting clays shooting team in college. One niece married a hunter last year - all his friends think he is the luckiest guy in the world (she’s even got her own bird dog). Got a picture yesterday of her looking out from her bow hunting stand ..... yup, women make GREAT hunters!!!

3 posted on 09/29/2012 7:10:43 AM PDT by MissMagnolia (Being powerful is like being a lady. If you have to tell people you are, you aren't. (M.Thatcher))
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Today is opening day deer season in my part of Oregon. Too warm, though.

4 posted on 09/29/2012 7:13:40 AM PDT by Rio (Tempis fugit.)
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To: Kaslin

I do like Bambi nachos, but I love Bambi burritos!

5 posted on 09/29/2012 7:19:42 AM PDT by andyk (I have sworn...eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man.)
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To: andyk
Here in Southern MI the deer eat better than prime beef on a diet of corn, alfalfa, soy beans, and acorns.

They wind up tasting like prime beef, fat and tender.

6 posted on 09/29/2012 7:45:40 AM PDT by Beagle8U (Free Republic -- One stop shopping ....... It's the Conservative Super WalMart for news .)
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To: Kaslin
One of the perks I got with my marriage was a beautiful (think Sandra Santiaga from Miami Vice) stepdaughter. She was already an expert equestrian and caught the shooting bug from me. I have already passed on some of my toys to her,including a 1954 Winchester 70 in .220 swift. She is a very good with both rifle and shotgun and we are working on pistol. She loves to hunt, camp, kayak and fish. Sorry guys, she bagged a great husband last year.
7 posted on 09/29/2012 7:49:01 AM PDT by CrazyIvan (Obama's birth certificate was found stapled to Soros's receipt.)
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To: Kaslin

Our guy got a deer last night and another one this morning. Whoo Yhoo!

8 posted on 09/29/2012 7:51:28 AM PDT by Coldwater Creek (He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadows of the Almighty Psalm 91:)
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To: Beagle8U

Same here in corn belt Ill. I hunt for meat only and take a doe. I have actually seen some marbling in the meat.

9 posted on 09/29/2012 7:53:24 AM PDT by CrazyIvan (Obama's birth certificate was found stapled to Soros's receipt.)
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To: Kaslin

10 posted on 09/29/2012 9:33:51 AM PDT by Tennessee Nana
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To: Tennessee Nana; All
*cue song "I'VE GOT HIGH HOPES"*

11 posted on 09/29/2012 9:38:08 AM PDT by skinkinthegrass (WA DC E$tabli$hment; DNC/RNC/Unionists...Brazilian saying: "$@me Old $hit; w/ different flie$" :^)
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To: Kaslin; george76; Flycatcher; girlangler

Ping to a beautiful dream. :-)

Bump for Bambi chicken fried steak.

12 posted on 09/29/2012 10:07:12 AM PDT by jazusamo ("Intellect is not wisdom" -- Thomas Sowell)
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To: jazusamo; george76; girlangler

Love that dream!

The whole article reminds me of Bambi Leg Camp. No joke.

On one of our bird survey points in the Spring Mountains this year, my surveyor partner and I found a great remote campsite where we often crashed at night. On the trail to it, there was a deer leg strung up by wire on a juniper. Then right by it, there was a hand-written sign that read: Bambi Leg Camp.

At the end of the season though, someone must have took "offense" at this. On our last visit, the deer leg was gone. But the sign -- Bambi Leg Camp -- remained.


13 posted on 09/30/2012 7:06:13 AM PDT by Flycatcher (God speaks to us, through the supernal lightness of birds, in a special type of poetry.)
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To: Flycatcher

Good one — Bambi Leg Camp

Some people just don’t have a sense of humor. LOL!

14 posted on 09/30/2012 10:32:28 AM PDT by jazusamo ("Intellect is not wisdom" -- Thomas Sowell)
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