Skip to comments.Investigation nets arrests, drugs -- and alligator
Posted on 02/09/2013 7:01:07 AM PST by ConservativeStatement
Spurred by the shooting of an off-duty police officer, a three-month joint investigation of a street gang faction ended this week with eight arrests in Summit and Chicago, along with the confiscation of guns, drugs -- and an alligator.
After an arrest was made in December's shooting, authorities began an investigation into the Latin Kings gang faction the suspect belonged to, targeting drug sales in Summit and the Chicago Lawn police district on the Southwest Side, according to a CPD news release issued tonight.
(Excerpt) Read more at chicagotribune.com ...
But was it an assault alligator?
Did they shoot the alligator? Or, was it spared because, unlike a dog, it is on the endangered species list and no Fish and Wildlife officer was accompanying the strike team?
Apparently had it not been an off-duty police officer shot there would have been no investigation and arrest of eight gang members and rahm wouldnt be getting a new pair of shoes and the local firehouse crew wouldnt be cooking up Alligator sauce/picant.
The Israelis and Arabs realized that, if they continued fighting, they would someday end up destroying the whole
So they decided to settle their dispute with an ancient
practice: a duel of two, like David and Goliath. This “duel” would be a dog fight.
The Arabs found the biggest, meanest Dobermans and Rottweilers in the world. They bred them together and then
crossed their offspring with the meanest Siberian wolves.
The negotiators agreed each side would take 5 years to develop the best fighting dog they could. The dog that won the fight would earn its people the right to rule the
The losing side would have to lay down its arms for good.
They selected only the biggest, strongest puppy of each litter, fed it the best food and killed all the other puppies. They used steroids and trainers in their quest
for the perfect killing machine.
After the 5 years were up, they had a dog that needed steel prison bars on its cage. Only expert trainers could handle this incredibly nasty and ferocious beast.
When the day of the big dog-fight finally arrived, the Israelis showed up with a very strange-looking animal, a
Dachshund that was 10 feet long!
Everyone at the dogfight arena felt sorry for the Israelis. No one there seriously thought this weird, odd-looking animal stood any chance against the growling beast over in the Arab camp. All the bookies took one look and predicted that the Arab dog would win in less than a minute.
As the cages were opened, the Dachshund slowly waddled toward the center of the ring. The Arab dog leaped from its cage and charged the giant wiener-dog.
As he got to within an inch of the Israeli dog, the Dachshund opened its jaws and swallowed the Arab beast whole
in one bite. There was nothing left but a small puff of fur from the Arab killer dog’s tail floating to the ground.
The stunned crowd of international observers, bookies and media personnel let out a collective gasp of disbelief and surprise.
The Arabs approached the Israelis, muttering and shaking their heads in disbelief. “We do not understand,” said their leader, “Our top scientists and breeders worked for 5 long years with the meanest, biggest Dobermans, Rottweilers and Siberian wolves, and they developed an incredible killing machine of a dog!”
The Israelis replied. “Well, for 5 years, we have had a team of Jewish plastic surgeons from Boca Raton working to make an alligator look like a Dachshund.”