Skip to comments.Failing a Generation of American Boys
Posted on 03/13/2013 3:19:10 PM PDT by neverdem
A pervasive anti-boy culture is wrecking our nations very future.
As I look at my 5-year old son, I hope that I am helping to mold a young man who lives his life with integrity and self-reliance, understanding the value of hard work and good manners and the true self-esteem that only these things can create within a productive life.
I think my wife and I are doing well, being conscious of these things, but as I look around us, what is happening what has happened to a generation of boys and young men in America is saddening and frightening.
About a month ago, my wife handed me a book and said you really have to read this. She sounded like she meant it, so I did. She was right.
The book is Boys Adrift: The Five Factors Driving the Growing Epidemic of Unmotivated Boys and Underachieving Young Men, by Dr. Leonard Sax.
If you are the parent of a boy under the age of 18 or so, this book is a must read. Really must read.
Dr. Sax describes and explains how changes in our educational system, such as removing competition and zero tolerance policies for even pretending to use fake guns, along with over-prescription of ADHD drugs and a particularly damaging aspect of modern life over-playing of video games are creating a generation of unmotivated, unaccomplished slackers...
(Excerpt) Read more at spectator.org ...
Liberalism has been eroding many aspects of our culture. This is just one more example.
I have 2 grandsons....totally lost, given the women’s lib, the gays, and the federal government, all lined up against the male...the future is bleak for young men...
Yep-—the feminization of men-—homosexualization of boys-—to make a bunch of Beibers who lust after men, so can never have true healthy friendships-— who are more concerned about their makeup and hairdos (narcissists) and sex, than the principles of Christianity (self-sacrifice).
It is only those who will sacrifice for the future (or others) who will “fight” for good and freedom. It is the Natural male nature to be protective and die for causes. Women are the nurturers—that is why they are forced to work and let the state raise emotionally damaged and vulnerable children. No Lincolns—no Mark Twains, No Teddy Roosevelts who are dedicated to “causes” or others. IT is all about self.
Homosexuals are idolators-—people who worship self-—(same) and can not relate to the “other”-—different. This isolating of women and men( to divide and create hate) and destroy the children’s emotional development and role models, is the root of the destruction of the family——this removal of mother from the home and destruction of the marriage contract (no fault), so the state can shape “what and how” your little kids “Think”. They destroy Truth—Natural Law—the concept of Reason and Logic—to create non-thinking adult (zombies). Public Schools are their means of destruction—along with the sodomites who own Hollywood (Corey Feldman’s rapers).
“So whereas men cant find women in China, young adult women struggle to find young adult men, at least men worth finding, in the United States.”
Well boo hoo. Sorry, but as a young adult man I feel no sympathy. I hate how a lot of guys my age still act like teens, but lets be honest, the system’s biased against us.
Why waste time on dates with women,(which cost money and time and heartache) when there’s a good chance she’ll get bent out of shape because she finds what used to be “chivalry” sexist or misogyny.
Say you do get married. What’s to stop her from taking everything and the kids because she gets all goo-goo eyed for some other guy? I’ve had plenty of other guys tell me just that, they feel disposable.
The culture’s messed up, and lots of guys rather just drop out than try to find the decent women. Feminism is creating victims for both genders.
I’d love to have coffee with you sometime. Dawg girl you are smart!
The moment my first son was born (14 years ago), I was very aware of gender discrimination and the way society tried to mock and humiliate my son for being male. I promised myself that I would fight this discrimination from shaping him, and I have for the most part. I fight tooth and nail with my own feminist parents and inlaws, school officials and medical people.
It was hard at first ,and lonely, but trust me, no one messes with me now. My boys will be treated fairly or they will get a kind of wrath, from me, that doesn’t stop. I just wear that concept, that I won’t stand for sexism, so comfortably that people don’t even start with me.
I had a conversation yesterday, with a Mom (while her son stood nearby) about his school experience, and she just mocked him and humiliated him (her own son) .. and he just looked off sadly. I hated that, and I leaned in close to him and told him that I really appreciate how great boys are, and how they are so smart, and he flashed a smile. I read it in his eyes that he was happy to be appreciated for more than sports.
Feminists have conditioned mothers to have detain for their own sons, for no reason. Women need to start to push back and say NO. No more.
The three primary factors that he argues have had the unintended consequence of feminizing boys are changes at school (less competition combined with less experiential, more book learning), video games and medications for ADHD. It’s a combination of social, cultural, and biological factors that don’t fall along strictly ideologically lines; but unfortunately political correctness has such a stranglehold on modern thought the very idea that males, of any age, could need our society’s attention does appear to be anathema to liberal thinking.
I have an “educated” niece that posted to face book her admiration to a friend, who is an instructor somewhere, making a point to randomly giving pink colored poster paper to boys to, “introduce” them to gender options.
It is a complete waste of my time to argue with her. She is totally blind to the fact the reason the Catholic church has so many priest that prey on children is because the homosexuals have taken it over, not to mention the public school systems. She blind to what the lesbians have done to the Girl Scouts.
Plus, she is totally for homosexual acceptance by the Boy Scouts. It just pisses me off. She has a masters from Georgetown and is a 30 something from a wealthy family. She is dumb as a rock.
A fine article. Thank you so very much for posting it.
Boys are DRIVEN to the fantasy world of video games. D R I V E N. And why? Because liberals have outlawed or demonized any outlet men, young and old, used to have.
So before this turns into a video game bashing thread, I ask that people think about the above before screaming that Mario, Halo or Skyrim is the root of all evil.
Good post. Yes, both political parties have already done that damage for decades. Have fun. Enjoy the slide.
Gov’t schools,indeed government in virtually manifestation has been telling our boys that they must strive to be more like girls, and girls should strive to become like men. Boys get the message; the world can get along just fine without the personal qualities that masculinity offers. The final bastion, military service, is in the process of becoming both feminized and gender-neutralized.
That’s a good point. Hadn’t considered it from that angle.
Just like most of our societal problems all it takes is a refusal to be intimidated by the bullying usually directed at anyone who questions popularly 'acceptable' opinions.
An extremely insightful point a lot of people don’t seem to understand.
Amen, Sister! The solution has to come from the real Men, but they have been so beaten down for the last 40 years —will they come out and rise to the Challenge of saving the boys...and America in the process?? Will the Shrews who have taken over politics, the schools, the jobs allow a reversal of decline? Not without a Big Fight, I fear.
Anything traditionally masculine like hunting, ‘playing cops/robbers/army/dirt bikes...you name it, has either been pussified or eliminated outright. There are kids getting suspended for army men on cupcakes and pop tarts shaped like guns. PETA and Sierra have been on multi decade tears shutting down hunting/off-roading. A kid without a bicycle helmet is grounds for a visit from the child welfare dept.
Video games are the last bastion where boys can escape liberal utopia and ‘pretend’ to do all the things the libs call evil.
When all the banned/demonized things are reverted to normal, I’ll worry about kids and video games. Until then I consider it the ONLY thing between society and a daily dose of Columbine.
I also find that most people demonizing VGs as evil play poker/canasta/whatever and have no problem with that form of gaming.
People need to set aside the MSM sriven hype and think about this clearly. The Dungeons and Dragons hysteria of the 80s did not as predicted, lead to a mass movement of satanists.
And since young men LIKE guns, thanks to modern video games, since thats the only contact many can have with them, it’s pretty short sighted for people to condemn the one thing standing stopping their absorption into the Borg collective of the left.
Take away the only remaining outlet they have for all that teen testosterone and watch where they vent it.
Not too often and timing is everything, but .. tough shit is a man's way of dealing with some shit.
Public school demonizes boys. Homeschool your sons!
As a Christian I can say many many churches are at fault for feminizing men. I’m not talking about having compassion or true christian virtues but twisted interpretations of the Gospels.
the left has done this to minimize male refusal to go along with their agenda. males normally are more independent than females. they will fight totalitarian authority and this is where the real threat lies to liberal power structures. girls can be coerced to go along with carrots or sticks far more easily. so they essentially have to destroy maleness.
if more people knew this and explained it to boys and their dads, we’d all bebetter off. church folks, this means you too, you can expose what is going on.
AMEN! Parents, homeschool all your kids, boys and girls. And get started ASAP. Start instilling strong Judeo-Christian morals and values. Hurry!
Given the direction of this country, homeschooling will end in a very few years. Jam in as much as you can now.
I remember when femenazis made most of the major changes we see in public education in the name of equality for girls in the 80’s. Central was to enforce “cooperative” learning and “values based” education because they said girls do better in that enviornment. They also demanded liberal teachers call on girls who were slow to respond to questions and ignore white boys whose hands would shoot up to answer the question first. I noticed teachers graded subjective papers in obvious favor of girls when my oldest son was in high school. The research paper he wrote for his girlfriend at the last minute (she screwed up and needed a lot of help to pass) got an “A” and his paper got a “C.” He wrote his better.
I knew the changes to education made by feminists would be a bad enviornment for boys. It was designed to be a bad end for boys as it was designed and installed by lesbo radicals who hate males. Equality would be acheived through hobbling heterosexual males - especially white males.
They are back with the gay agenda and they are hunting boys.
They tried to put my own son on drugs in his elemetary school. It was nuts. They were pushing drugs on boys like crazy in the late 90s because the feminist teachers did not like the male nature. Not all, but most had a harder time focusing in the “cooperative” learning enviornment (noisey and a loose, disorganized structure compared to the boy’s learning enviornment feminists replaced).
Zero tolerance was introduced to make males, basically, a serious offense at school.
that is typical of the women I have run into while looking for my significant other. I’ve come to a point that I avoid all liberals... which leaves very few women, especially if you want someone with a college education.
btw, the other meme women today have when they come across someone with a job is the thought that anyone doing 50+ hours/wk to put food on the table must be a workaholic. (working less then 30, or being unemployed is better? *sigh*)
USA is the land of hen-pecked husbands. I don’t blame the women for that. I have visited 30 countries, and no where except Britain perhaps, I have seen such hen-pecked husbands. May be it is an Anglo-Saxon trait/culture. At my work I used to watch with amusements how so many married men would wag their tails at every good looking woman in the joint. Just like a dog begging for a treat.
When I first arrived in US, I was flabbergasted there was a women’e lib movement here! The men here need the movement, not the women.
Love your posts!
Well, that may be so with the younger generation, but it will bite them in the butt someday anytime you go against God, which is what this role reversal amounts to. I am an old lady with traditional conservative beliefs — I don’t agree with anything that went on with female “liberation.” However, my ex-husband agreed with it and had no problem that I made a lot more money than he did. I was very unhappy, wanting only to take care of my family and my home, but others got to do that for me. So, after almost 25 years, I left him. Now I take care of myself, but it sure wasn’t in my plan to be alone for the rest of my life.
Not all, but most boys really need focused, organized or systematic intellegent lessons. A disciplined and focused classroom is important for them. They also do well with an applied study of building, creating and learning mechanisms of how things work.
Social studies used to be about civics (US basic law and study of the our constitutional political system). They learned about other political systems and how they worked compared to our own. They learned about industry (how business works, what work men do in the economy and world in present day and in history and how they got there), National and world geography, foreign relations, western history (the roots of our political and social system), and argiculture -food production and nutrition.
They learned about a man’s responsibility to be honest and fair and to his family - like it was a big deal for a man to take on a wife and children! Boys were expected to be doers, makers, dreamers and honorable in their associations with others. Freedom came with social and economic responsibility, to make it work. They had art and music and play time.
I am not mentioning girls but not to leave them out - they were learning the same stuff as boys, except girls were given traditional female responsibilities in society were muuuuuch different than today. They were protrayed as bringing up the rear of society - making sure no one fell through the cracks (poor people, handicapped people, old people and children) and everything got organized and covered in their churches, families and communities. They were taught about manners and why they are important and why girls are to be expert diplomats and how to negotiate kinship with others in the community and within their families. It was the unpaid work (volunteer work) of society. Men were responsible for bringing in the money for everything the women did.
From my point of view, women really controlled society - the children, quality and nature of life. It was respectful of the female nature from my point of view, even though not all women are totally feminine and not all men are totally masculine fitting into slots. They were teaching to the nature, values and life of the majority of the public to set the pace of a free society (unfortunately that freedom did not cross race lines).
I know this because I collected a bunch of old classroom and education books written before socialists and socialists and femenazis cleansed the culture and hobbled boys in the name of girls. I homeschooled one of the boys and formed his studies on some of what I learned which made sense for his nature and this age. It worked. We had a great, productive time together.
Since public schools are totally wrecked, maybe heterosexual boys need their own schools, built around their nature of learning and being in a Western based cultural and social setting in order to recover.
When I was collecting information on social studies, I found that books for boys in segregated black schools were the same as for boys in white schools. Everyone at that time examined the wisdom of segregated “equality” and the awfulness of slavery. Race was presented all so “settled” and totally WIERD and false to me. But Black men were expected to be good breadwinners, husbands and dads and honorable just like white men were taught. Black women were taught the same social responsibilities as white women. Ofcourse, Blacks had limited opportunity making the breadwinning next to impossible, but that was not covered. From the textbooks, there were just all a bunch of polite, “rational” racists, is all. : ( Talk about a BLIND spot in an, otherwise, good society. But liberals should not have cleansed out the good in the name of the bad. They have totally wrecked society.
Tell your friend to look up the story of Jesse Dirkhising and explain why everyone has heard of Matthew Shepard but almost no one knows Jesse’s name.
Some people are so miserably indoctrinated that they actually think that a homosexual male would make an ideal sitter for a young boy. If the press had told the story of Jesse and others like him there would be very few with such vile and foolish ideas.
Ah, but it's worse than that! If you don't show them chivalry then you're a 'disrespectful punk'... heck, merely insinuating that they may not be deserving of your deference can put one in the dog-house. No, I'd say that it's a losing proposition altogether.
Say you do get married. Whats to stop her from taking everything and the kids because she gets all goo-goo eyed for some other guy? Ive had plenty of other guys tell me just that, they feel disposable.
And the system's still biased for them; I know that men can present evidence of the woman abusing children in an attempt to get sole custody only to be denied.
You need not feel “alone”. Get involved as a political activist. Never boring!
This article says “to be a parent” trouble is most boys and girls don’t have a father instead have a baby’s daddy. Just not the same thing.
Outstanding advice and it has the dual benefit of strengthening youth against pop culture, which never lasts. Teach your kids to be classic - it takes time and thought which are the exact opposite of pop culture.
The video games thing could be an issue, but the rest of the problems he described can be dodged by homeschooling.
It would be front page news and SSM a silly idea abandoned to the dustbin of history.
I met a teacher who teaches teachers not children. She would not tell me everything but she teaches gender neutrality. Girls touch each other lovingly and brush each others hair and they want boys to do stuff like that as well so they play games that encourage that
Unfortunately, homeschooling is a luxury that most can't afford, especially for those determined to keep up with the Joneses. Two breadwinners are needed in most of suburbia.