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Why did the drunk and naked Australian cross the croc infested river?
Daily Mail London ^ | 04/05/2013 | Richard Shears

Posted on 04/05/2013 11:52:12 AM PDT by Timocrat

Why did the drunk and naked Australian cross the croc infested river? For a couple of crates of Jack Daniels of course.

(Excerpt) Read more at dailymail.co.uk ...


TOPICS: News/Current Events
KEYWORDS: australian; crocsandsnakes; drunk; jackdaniels
Hold muh beer I need a Jack.
1 posted on 04/05/2013 11:52:12 AM PDT by Timocrat
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To: Timocrat

Because he could.


2 posted on 04/05/2013 11:54:36 AM PDT by dfwgator
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To: Timocrat
Been watching way too much Bear Grylls.
3 posted on 04/05/2013 11:56:32 AM PDT by Huskrrrr
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To: Timocrat

For some Foster’s mate!!


4 posted on 04/05/2013 12:01:57 PM PDT by 4yearlurker (Hurry up Spring!!!!)
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To: Timocrat; SkyDancer
Stolen from a FRiend's home page ...


5 posted on 04/05/2013 12:02:13 PM PDT by knarf (I say things that are true ... I have no proof ... but they're true)
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To: Timocrat

Sometimes when I see these stories about the dangerous exploits of drunken younger men, I think back 25 years and have to say to myself, “There but for the Grace of God go I.”


6 posted on 04/05/2013 12:06:12 PM PDT by ElkGroveDan (My tagline is in the shop.)
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To: Timocrat

Why did the drunk and naked Australian cross the croc infested river?

********

To retrieve his severed genitals from a croc!


7 posted on 04/05/2013 12:07:53 PM PDT by mardi59 (IMPEACH OBAMA NOW!!!!!)
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To: FReepers
Stop Goofing Off And Donate


Click The Pic

8 posted on 04/05/2013 12:08:00 PM PDT by DJ MacWoW (My faith and politics cannot be separated)
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To: ElkGroveDan
I'm not very young anymore, and sometimes I wonder what adventure Friday night will reveal to me on Saturday morning (or whenever I recover) ;)

/johnny

9 posted on 04/05/2013 12:10:02 PM PDT by JRandomFreeper (Gone Galt)
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To: Timocrat

Because there were five croc’s behind him ....


10 posted on 04/05/2013 12:10:44 PM PDT by SkyDancer (Live your life in such a way that the Westboro church will want to picket your funeral.)
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To: Timocrat

Because he was stapled to the chicken.


11 posted on 04/05/2013 12:10:56 PM PDT by edboock (The United States Constitution ©1787, All Rights Reserved)
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To: knarf

None’s the wurry, mate.


12 posted on 04/05/2013 12:11:25 PM PDT by SkyDancer (Live your life in such a way that the Westboro church will want to picket your funeral.)
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To: Timocrat; Fred Nerks; LucyT; little jeremiah; MestaMachine; Polarik
Why did the drunk and naked Australian cross the croc infested river? >>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

To get some research from Fred Nerks?

13 posted on 04/05/2013 12:17:37 PM PDT by Candor7 (Obama fascism article:(http://www.americanthinker.com/2009/05/barack_obama_the_quintessentia_1.html))
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To: Timocrat

Maybe he just wanted to feed the hungry croks!


14 posted on 04/05/2013 12:17:57 PM PDT by dalereed
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To: JRandomFreeper
Oh my ...

I don't want to remember the too many times auto-pilot got me home.

I don't want to remember the looks on my friend's faces as they were about to unload a shitload of asshole I was last night.

And thank God ... HE doesn't remember neither.

15 posted on 04/05/2013 12:26:51 PM PDT by knarf (I say things that are true ... I have no proof ... but they're true)
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To: ElkGroveDan
You too? Gives me the willies. Sometimes I look back and think, omg, there was probably only one in hundred, or even only one in a thousand, chances I would've survived this or that particular stupid stunt I did and, therefore, I must've been killed and am now living in one of the one in a googolplex universes where I actually exist and did survive.
16 posted on 04/05/2013 12:49:18 PM PDT by LibWhacker
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To: Timocrat

Australia has REDNECKS?.......


17 posted on 04/05/2013 1:10:27 PM PDT by Red Badger (Want to be surprised? Google your own name......Want to have fun? Google your friend's names........)
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To: Timocrat
Why did the drunk and naked Australian cross the croc infested river?

Obviously, he didn't want to get his clothes wet, and the bar was on the other side of the river, so he left his clothes on the bank, swam across the croc infested river, went to the bar and got stinkin' roaring drunk.

Then when he was drunk enough, he had to swim back across the river, because he needed to fetch his clothes.

After all, he didn't want to go home drunk and naked and have the wife think he'd been up to no good...

18 posted on 04/05/2013 1:13:44 PM PDT by Kenton
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To: 4yearlurker

Australia offers some very fine brews. Fosters is not, however, one of them. XXXX (Four X) Bitter (Queensland), Swan Lager (WA), Boags (Tasmania), etc. The list is practically endless. But Fosters is mostly for export and I have not yet met an actual Aussie who doesn’t call it swill.


19 posted on 04/05/2013 1:19:14 PM PDT by katana (Just my opinions)
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To: Timocrat

When I was a little biddy boy
My grandma bought me a cute little toy
Two Silver bells on a string
She told me it was my ding-a-ling-a-ling

My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won’t you play with My Ding-A-Ling
My Ding-A-Ling My Ding-A-Ling won’t you play with My Ding-A-Ling

When I was little boy In Grammar school
Always went by the very best rule
But Evertime the bell would ring
You’d catch me playing with my ding-a-ling

Once while climbing the garden wall,
Slipped and fell had a very bad fall
I fell so hard I heard birds sing,
But I held on to My ding-a-ling

Once while swimming cross turtle creek
Man them snappers right at my feet
Sure was hard swimming cross that thing
with both hands holding my dingaling

Now this here song it ain’t so bad
Prettiest little song that you ever had
And those of you who will not sing
must be playing with your on Ding-a-ling


20 posted on 04/05/2013 1:35:08 PM PDT by rlmorel (1793 French Jacobins and 2012 American Liberals have a lot in common.)
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To: Timocrat
"Why did the drunk and naked Australian cross the croc infested river?"

To get to the other bloody side, Mate..

21 posted on 04/05/2013 1:55:56 PM PDT by Chainmail (A simple rule of life: if you can be blamed, you're responsible.)
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To: Candor7
They're a different breed up North, their shoulders are all three axe-handles across and they are fearless. However, I don't believe the Jack Daniels part of the story, the big guys wouldn't be drinking anything but Bundaberg Rum.
22 posted on 04/05/2013 2:01:00 PM PDT by Fred Nerks (FAIR DINKUM)
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To: Timocrat

Dad?


23 posted on 04/05/2013 2:27:57 PM PDT by Joe Boucher ((FUBO))
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To: katana

The last time I had a Foster’s, back in the 20th century, I noticed that the label said the stuff was brewed under license by Heilemann’s in Canada.

Foster’s...Canadian for beer, eh?


24 posted on 04/05/2013 3:40:19 PM PDT by HartleyMBaldwin
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To: Timocrat

It isn’t the sort of thing you’d want to try sober. You could get hurt.


25 posted on 04/05/2013 3:45:57 PM PDT by Billthedrill
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To: Timocrat

26 posted on 04/05/2013 3:52:45 PM PDT by JoeProBono (A closed mouth gathers no feet - Mater tua caligas exercitus gerit ;-{)
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To: Fred Nerks

LOL. I thought you would get a kick out of the thread.
Bundaberh Rum, eh? Can’t get it here. Lambs Navy Rum dark is used a lot up here.( I have a bottle of 150 proof in case I need to use it to start my truck in the cold!)


27 posted on 04/06/2013 10:45:31 AM PDT by Candor7 (Obama fascism article:(http://www.americanthinker.com/2009/05/barack_obama_the_quintessentia_1.html))
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To: Timocrat

Shooting Kangaroos and other shit - (video)
TheFatAussieBarstard

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=m1yP0T1VBzk


28 posted on 04/06/2013 10:58:36 AM PDT by dennisw (too much of a good thing is a bad thing - Joe Pine)
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