Upcoming Press Conference as to why Terrorist cannot be Interviewed. (semi-satire)

self

[Chance Hart]

After hiring the same guy that played the coroner for the Sandy Hook Press Conference, I think that "We The Sheeple" will see it something like this on the Lame Stream Media.

First, the introduction of renowned neurologist, cosmic physicist, ufologist, all around Great Guy Dr. Joe Stalinofski.Q&A from WH Pressers: Q: Dr. Stalinofski Is the young confused TEEN able to communicate verbally? A: No, because of the proximity to the vocal cords in relation to the round hole at the end of the Assault Pistol where the bullet comes out, the extreme amount of combustive pressure caused the vocal cords to collapse. Q: Dr. Would it be possible for the lad to write down the answers to a few non sensitive questions? A: No, As you might be able to imagine, when the Assault pistol entered the boys mouth, it was pointed directly at his Spinal Cord. Unfortunately, at such close range - approximately 2" being the most accurate distance we can determine at this point, the bullet severed the Spinal Cord making his Young Body useless and non-operable from the Vocal Cords down.

Q: Would it be possible for the Child to Blink Yes and No answers to those Big Men in Dark Suits and earpieces? A: Again, this is another side effect of pulling the trigger while a loaded firearm is in your mouth. The dynamic compression severed the arterial blood flow to the Optic Nerves, not only blinding the boy, but also making the eyelids inoperable. I might point out that this Blast Compression also permanently injured the tiny little Hammer and Anvil portions of his inner ear causing him to be stone deaf.

I am handing out a copy of this Simple Exploded Chart that I have used here to explain the complicated Medical Situation this boy has UNEXPECTEDLY found himself in!

[TigersEye]

LOL

[smoothsailing]

[Uncle Chip]

As the old saying goes:

Ask me no questions and I will tell you no lies.