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Leno: ‘We Wanted a President That Listens to All Americans - Now We Have One’
Newsbusters ^

Posted on 06/08/2013 11:57:39 AM PDT by Sub-Driver

Leno: ‘We Wanted a President That Listens to All Americans - Now We Have One’ By Noel Sheppard Created 06/08/2013 - 2:02pm

Jay Leno continued his humorous attacks on the White House Friday.

In the middle of a lengthy set of opening monologue jokes about the various scandals plaguing Barack Obama, the NBC Tonight Show host said, “We wanted a president that listens to all Americans - now we have one” (video follows with transcript and absolutely no need for additional commentary):

JAY LENO: Well, let's see what's going on. Hey, Snoop is back in the news. Not Snoop Dogg, Snoop Obama. Yeah, Snoop Obama. A big change at the White House today. They closed the gift shop and opened a Verizon store. Yeah.

Well, this has become a huge controversy after it was revealed that the National Security Agency seized millions of Verizon phone records, and of course this has caused a panic among civil libertarians, constitutional scholars and cheating husbands everywhere. Oh my God.

How ironic is that? We wanted a president that listens to all Americans - now we have one. Yeah.

Actually, President Obama clarified the situation today. He said no one is listening to your phone calls. The president said it's not what the program is all about. You know, like the IRS isn’t about targeting certain political groups. That's not what it's about!

I mean what's going on? The White House has looked into our phone records, checking our computers, monitoring our e-mails. When did the government suddenly become our psycho ex-girlfriend? When did that happen? When did that happen? When did that happen?

You know, I'll tell you, if Obama wants to put this snooping thing to good use, how about spying on the IRS next time they throw a $4 million party. Why don't you do that one? Yes, exactly, exactly. Find out about that. Yeah.

As you know by now, the IRS has taken some heat for reportedly spending $4 million on a conference in Anaheim last year where employees took dancing lessons. One of the dances they learned? Tap dancing around the issues. Yes, that was very good, be able to tap dance

Well, the latest one that came out today. You see this one? They're saying the IRS paid an artist $17,000 to paint portraits of Abraham Lincoln to help inspire the IRS agents. You know, if they want to see a picture of Lincoln for inspiration, take out a $5 bill and save the taxpayers $16,995. Exactly. That's what they said. They said.

Oh, the hearings have been unbelievable this week. Congressional investigators say the IRS basically threw a $4 million party for themselves. But in fairness, who else is going to throw a party for the IRS? Really? Now, a going away party, I think we'd all chip in. I would chip in! I would chip in! There you are, no problem. I would pay for that.


TOPICS: Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS:
Snort.........
1 posted on 06/08/2013 11:57:39 AM PDT by Sub-Driver
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To: Sub-Driver

I’ve been tuning in just to see Leno’s monologue lately. He’s been on a roll with the scandal jokes!


2 posted on 06/08/2013 11:59:39 AM PDT by GeorgeWashingtonsGhost
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To: Sub-Driver

Snort is right! Jay just gets better and better. I thought he was out, but maybe he’s finishing his contract.


3 posted on 06/08/2013 11:59:45 AM PDT by andyk (I have sworn...eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man.)
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To: Sub-Driver

Well played, Jay.


4 posted on 06/08/2013 11:59:57 AM PDT by TADSLOS (The Event Horizon has come and gone. Buckle up and hang on.)
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To: Sub-Driver

Leno will pay for this...I’m not kidding...it may be awhile down the road...but he will pay. The Alinsky types NEVER forget.


5 posted on 06/08/2013 12:03:04 PM PDT by kjo (+)
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To: andyk

Jay was pushed out by the homo president of NBC Bob Greenblatt (an Obama buttboy), so Jay is paying him back with all the Obama Jokes and rising Nielsen ratings.


6 posted on 06/08/2013 12:03:46 PM PDT by jimbo123
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To: Sub-Driver

Leno is the only one two mocks both parties.


7 posted on 06/08/2013 12:04:17 PM PDT by miss marmelstein ( Richard Lives Yet!)
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To: GeorgeWashingtonsGhost

Me too I hadn’t watched in YEARS . . . now I think he’s pretty much been SPOT ON


8 posted on 06/08/2013 12:05:55 PM PDT by A_Former_Democrat
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To: kjo

You have to wonder, don’t you? Back in the day Leno’s jokes were 5-1 biased toward the Dems. Plus any joke made at the left still made them look cool. Bill’s a horndog, Bush an idiot for example. Suddenly Leno’s going after O with a vengeance.


9 posted on 06/08/2013 12:07:42 PM PDT by SoCal Pubbie
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To: kjo

He’s been slashing the IRS as well.


10 posted on 06/08/2013 12:07:49 PM PDT by BipolarBob
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To: Sub-Driver

Good line. He’ll be missed.


11 posted on 06/08/2013 12:08:12 PM PDT by TBP (Obama lies, Granny dies.)
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To: Sub-Driver; mickie
Good one, Jay!

Humorous line of the week, nay....the month.

The low-intelligence voters won't get it at all.

Leni

12 posted on 06/08/2013 12:11:02 PM PDT by MinuteGal
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To: Sub-Driver

Leno has been on a roll lately..I guess he figures since he’s out at NBC he can just go off and I am loving it..too bad he didnt start doing this a long time ago maybe his ratings would have been better


13 posted on 06/08/2013 12:11:08 PM PDT by Sarah Barracuda
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To: Sub-Driver

I’ve always liked Leno and glad he has taken the gloves off and is hammering zero. This has got to have an effect.

Many of my co-workers (tax accountants) are highly intelligent but unbelievably they seemed to get their news from Jon Stewart and supported zero - at least until lately. Now they’re fairly quiet about it all.


14 posted on 06/08/2013 12:11:20 PM PDT by Aria ( 2008 & 2012 weren't elections - they were coup d'etats.)
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To: Sub-Driver

No snort.


15 posted on 06/08/2013 12:12:21 PM PDT by Jeff Winston
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To: kjo

I hope his car collection is well guarded/protected!


16 posted on 06/08/2013 12:13:14 PM PDT by GOYAKLA (Waiting for the Golden Screw to be removed from Obama's navel and his a$$ falls off!)
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To: Sub-Driver

He’s been hilarious lately — Leno unchained


17 posted on 06/08/2013 12:14:35 PM PDT by Uncle Chip
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To: A_Former_Democrat

If he did this 4 years ago, his rating would have gone through the roof, every other late night butt boy would have followed suit and we might be dealing with President Romney.


18 posted on 06/08/2013 12:17:01 PM PDT by EQAndyBuzz (The reason we own guns is to protect ourselves from those wanting to take our guns from us.)
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To: Sub-Driver

You can see the video clip of this at this location.

You’ll have to watch a couple of short commercials, but less than two minutes in you’ll be watching Leno take this administration apart.

Enjoy...

http://www.nbc.com/the-tonight-show/video/friday-june-7-2013/n37811/


19 posted on 06/08/2013 12:17:28 PM PDT by DoughtyOne (Obama lied and four men died after he went to hide...)
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To: TBP

I live two towns over from where jay grew up in Massachusetts, so i’m pretty confident i’m accurate on this. the rest of the country thinks mass is liberal, but that’s because the pols here are really good at getting out their base...teachers unions, other public unions, welfare people and illegals who vote by fraud.

jay is like me, male, Italian heritage. people like me (and i’m arguing he is like me) are very conservative but its always like swimming against the tide here.
someone here mentioned jay used to be 5 to 1 for dem jokes. that’s because he knew he had to. now he doesn’t have to and you are seeing his true colors. believe me, over the years at Hollywood parties jay probably pretended he was liberal, but like me, when the boys (ie white, male, Christian, straight) are alone in the backroom, you wouldn’t know we’re from Massachusetts.


20 posted on 06/08/2013 12:22:03 PM PDT by willywill
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To: DoughtyOne

Yea but it’s the rammifications that really suck from all of his big boy tantrums!


21 posted on 06/08/2013 12:22:14 PM PDT by Conserev1 ("Still Clinging to my Bible and my Weapon")
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To: Jeff Winston
No snort.

Lol. Meant "No kidding."

Don't drive the information superhighway while distracted. :-)

22 posted on 06/08/2013 12:24:40 PM PDT by Jeff Winston
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To: A_Former_Democrat

If he did this 4 years ago, his ratings would have gone through the roof, every other late night butt boy would have followed suit and we might be dealing with President Romney.


23 posted on 06/08/2013 12:28:57 PM PDT by EQAndyBuzz (The reason we own guns is to protect ourselves from those wanting to take our guns from us.)
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To: Sub-Driver

Leno’s really going out with a bang. Makes you wonder what might have been different had he been ‘free’ all along.


24 posted on 06/08/2013 12:30:33 PM PDT by 9YearLurker
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To: Sub-Driver

Why doesn’t someone ask Letterman if HE still thinks Bengazi was about a YouTube video...?


25 posted on 06/08/2013 12:32:00 PM PDT by gaijin
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To: Sub-Driver

26 posted on 06/08/2013 12:34:23 PM PDT by JoeProBono (Mille vocibus imago valet;-{)
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To: willywill
someone here mentioned jay used to be 5 to 1 for dem jokes. that’s because he knew he had to. now he doesn’t have to and you are seeing his true colors. believe me, over the years at Hollywood parties jay probably pretended he was liberal, but like me, when the boys (ie white, male, Christian, straight) are alone in the backroom, you wouldn’t know we’re from Massachusetts.

If a guy believes conservative, but acts left-wing all the time, then what does it matter to us if he thinks like a conservative? Leno's lean to the left in all his performances has probably done quite a bit to help push the country and the low-information public in that direction. If Leno really is conservative, which I doubt, then he is a traitor to his own beliefs. This little bit that he gets in before he's axed won't do a thing to undo the damage he's already done. Leno can KMA.
27 posted on 06/08/2013 12:34:39 PM PDT by fr_freak
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To: 9YearLurker

Also makes you wonder just how liberal America really isn’t. Sadly, now that we are being monitored and watched, fewer will be willing to speak out.


28 posted on 06/08/2013 12:39:51 PM PDT by Toespi
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To: Jeff Winston

> > No snort.

> Lol. Meant “No kidding.”

> Don’t drive the information superhighway while distracted. :-)

‘Snort a problem.


29 posted on 06/08/2013 12:48:09 PM PDT by Slings and Arrows (You can't have IngSoc without an Emmanuel Goldstein)
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To: Toespi
I do not watch late night TV so I am grateful these clips are added on here, otherwise I would never see them. What the late night comics talk about and poke fun at is a very good barometer of public sentiment.

And that brings me to my question. Can anyone on here endure Obama sycophant Letterman? If so, what, if anything, is he saying about current events? Nothing? Avoiding it like the plague?

Right now he must be in a state of complete depression.

30 posted on 06/08/2013 12:48:11 PM PDT by Robwin
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To: EQAndyBuzz

Precisely. It takes balls to be an American. Jay is showing the rest of the geldings how it’s done. Where’s the free spirit? Take off the yoke and chains, people. There’s a whole lot of ass kickin’ that needs doing. Let’s get started.


31 posted on 06/08/2013 12:55:57 PM PDT by budwiesest (It's that girl from Alaska, again.)
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To: GeorgeWashingtonsGhost

For goodness sake.....Jay Leno is keeping NBC alive!!!! MSNBC is on life support and soon the doctors inside the ICU will be pulling the plug. Well.......Jay, my boy.....if NBC cans you.....Roger Ailes, FOX TV will grab you quicker then a NY minute!!! Good....you finally came to see what a farce and failure POTUS Obama and his Obamabots are!!! A sea change is afoot, and you timed it just right!!! David Letterman, dumb and biased as he is, does not have a clue!!! And....Fallon and Kimmel are sleep at the wheel, as is SNC!!!


32 posted on 06/08/2013 12:59:04 PM PDT by JLAGRAYFOX ( My only objective is to defeat and destroy Obama & his Democrat Party, politically!!!)
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To: kjo
Leno will pay for this...I’m not kidding...it may be awhile down the road...but he will pay. The Alinsky types NEVER forget.

Come on, people in our government aren't vindictive. This sounds like one of those 'conspiracy theories'. What evidence do you have to even make you think someone would do this ? Who in government would even make such a threat ?

(/sarcasm)

"Everyone not with us is against us and they better be ready because we don't forget. The ones who helped us will be rewarded, the ones who opposed us will get what they deserve. There is going to be hell to pay"


33 posted on 06/08/2013 1:02:42 PM PDT by UCANSEE2 (The monsters are due on Maple Street)
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To: fr_freak
If Leno really is conservative, which I doubt, then he is a traitor to his own beliefs.

He may be a real lefty, I don't know. But, I'll bet this all just to tweak the new boss till he leaves.

34 posted on 06/08/2013 1:08:51 PM PDT by TangoLimaSierra (To the left the truth looks like Right-Wing extremism.)
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To: kjo

Leno will pay for this...I’m not kidding...it may be awhile down the road...but he will pay. The Alinsky types NEVER forget.


Problem is that like a LOT of us old guys, he doesn’t care. I just saw the movie Red. Hilarious movie!

Old people with courage and skills are dangerous to the bad guys. When you are close to death anyway, and wonder what kind of legacy you are going to leave, principles mean more than life - especially if you are a “bible clinger”.

And “old and ruthless” beats “young and strong” every time.


35 posted on 06/08/2013 1:10:33 PM PDT by cuban leaf (Were doomed! Details at eleven.)
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To: Sub-Driver

Not ALL. He never listened to Rev. Wright or Bill Ayres, and he’ll swear he’s never heard anyone who talked to him about fast and furious, Benghazi, the AP, IRS abuses, or targeting conservative non-profits. He’s never even listened to anything coming out of his own attorney general.


36 posted on 06/08/2013 1:18:45 PM PDT by bigbob
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To: Sub-Driver

Leno is on fire!
He smells blood and his lapping it up.

Pray for America to Wake Up


37 posted on 06/08/2013 1:19:56 PM PDT by bray (Stop tolerating beheading!)
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To: fr_freak
switch to decaf, you are far too critical.

We NEED more support, this is a good thing.

Be happy for every voice that attacks Obama now.

38 posted on 06/08/2013 1:37:59 PM PDT by Kansas58
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To: Sub-Driver
When did the government suddenly become our psycho ex-girlfriend?

Like Jodi Arias? That ended with 39 stab wounds, a slit throat and a bullet in the brain. Leno may get by with just a visit from the IRSS.

Used to like Leno, then he got all demmy, lobbing marshmallows at King Obama. Now he's making me laugh again. I wonder where they're getting their audience. Most seemed to be liberal in the past, with even a hint of mocking Obama met with chilly silence instead of laughter.

39 posted on 06/08/2013 1:43:05 PM PDT by informavoracious (We're being "punished" with Stanley Ann's baby. Obamacare: shovel-ready healthcare.)
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To: A_Former_Democrat

Does anyone know if Leno’s ratings have spiked in the last month or two, since he began calling 0bama out for the failure he is?


40 posted on 06/08/2013 1:53:40 PM PDT by GeorgeWashingtonsGhost
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To: miss marmelstein
Leno is the only one two mocks both parties.

Only very recently, perhaps the last month or two, prior to that it was very rare for Jay to make a joke about Democrats.

41 posted on 06/08/2013 2:41:11 PM PDT by RJL (There's no greed like the greed of a liberal politician buying votes with your money.)
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To: Sub-Driver; sickoflibs
The White House has looked into our phone records, checking our computers, monitoring our e-mails. When did the government suddenly become our psycho ex-girlfriend? When did that happen?

Leno's great.

42 posted on 06/08/2013 3:34:13 PM PDT by GOPJ (MSNBC is to news channels as Ringling Bros' Clown College is to Harvard University. - - Greenfield)
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To: fr_freak

If a guy believes conservative, but acts left-wing all the time, then what does it matter to us if he thinks like a conservative? Leno’s lean to the left in all his performances has probably done quite a bit to help push the country and the low-information public in that direction. If Leno really is conservative, which I doubt, then he is a traitor to his own beliefs. This little bit that he gets in before he’s axed won’t do a thing to undo the damage he’s already done. Leno can KMA.

mostly i’m not disagreeing with that. i guess i’m trying to say, if you take a guy like leno or matt damon, also from mass, and you say, here’s your choice, flip hamburgers at mcdonalds, or have all the money, fame, spagos and cocaine you want, but say what we tell you to say...these guys are choosing to sell their soul to the Hollywood producers whose parents taught them the Christian middle class is dangerous...and now they (the producers)have the power to change it


43 posted on 06/08/2013 3:59:15 PM PDT by willywill
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To: RJL

No, he’s made jokes about all of them. He was much better at it in the 1980s but all comics have turned pc.


44 posted on 06/08/2013 4:37:42 PM PDT by miss marmelstein ( Richard Lives Yet!)
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To: Sub-Driver

To the tune of, When the Party’s Over...


45 posted on 06/08/2013 6:26:33 PM PDT by OldNewYork (Biden '13. Impeach now.)
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