Skip to comments.Woman missing in Washington after going on naked 'spiritual quest' with nothing but a fanny pack
Posted on 06/12/2013 9:39:28 PM PDT by Baynative
Authorities are searching for a Washington woman who was last seen walking away from a campground in nothing but a fanny pack to go on a 'spiritual quest'.
Maureen Kelly, 19, went missing early Sunday night from the Canyon Creek Campground in the Gifford Pinchot National Forest in southwest Washington, according to KPTV.
A friend told the Skamania County Sheriff's office that Kelly left the campsite to go on a naked 'spiritual quest' with nothing but a fanny pack, but she never returned.
(Excerpt) Read more at dailymail.co.uk ...
Bride of Bigfoot ?
“She had talked about doing this spiritual quest for evidently quite some time. The folks that she was with, they felt that this was something she needed to do,” Undersheriff Dave Cox told ABC News.
[ left the campsite to go on a naked ‘spiritual quest’]
Well.... she achieved her goal. She is probably now a ‘spirit’. Probably talking to God face to face at this moment.
Egats. Ignorant to the predators.
D. B. Cooper's new main squeeze...
Seriously, I hope she is found alive and unharmed.
I can see it now.
Maureen: “God, you created us naked. I was only trying to be closer to you. Why did you let them kill me? Why didn’t you do something?
GOD: “Yes, I created you naked. But I also created cotton.”
She should have been found by now... something is fishy if this youngster is still missing.
So, if she had been talking about doing this “spiritual quest” for a long time, wouldn’t someone have an idea of how long this quest was intended to be? One hour? One month?
Not to ignore the seriousness of her being missing, but the headline provides the opening of about 1,000 jokes!
Maybe she was planning on tiptoeing through the tulips naked?
She’s toast by now. It has been cold and wet with the temps in the 40’s at night. A nekkid girl loaded on ‘shrooms won’t last long...sad. There’s a Darwin Award nomination here.
No, bare bait!
Does this fanny pack make my butt look big?
It’s possible she came across old Sasquatch and lost a match of Papers, Rocks, and Scissors to him?
They tracked her through the canyon to a road. Could be she was abducted.
Not too wet at my place. Definitely chilly though.
Serious risk of exposure.
If she shows up in my back yard, I’ll let ya know, after I warm her up, of course!
Think of it as evolution in action.
If you are on some idiot spiritual quest you probably don’t have skillz to be out buck naked in the woods.
I’d make but, I luv colder, being naked in cold weather and I luv being out in the woods.
would have at least took a couple of knives, 250 feet of paracord, 350 yrds of 15# test, magnesium and Swiss steel firestarter and a stainless steel cup.
Thatz the minimum for walking around nekidd....
Surprise...it’s cold and rainy here.
That’s global warming, ya know!
What would you do if you were the one driving down that road and found her standing there in her birthday suit?
Bill Clinton could probably find her.
Had to have been a lib. Every time they decide to do something that is earth-shattering, the first thing they do is take off their clothes.
Sounds like the natural dispensation of idiot genetic material is about to occur.
For non rural raised people: The laws of civilized humans are intended for the humans. While we love to humanize other species with names , sweaters, funerals, HEALTH INSURANCE etc. ad naseum, THE animals don't know this. THEY ARE ANIMALS and some of them are fully capable of EATING YOU FOR DINNER. Some of our “domesticated” animals even accidentally maul, stomp, gore, or kick us SO BADLY that we die.
There was, is and always be a really important reason to be armed in the big woods. We didn't have to remind a 6 year old from the 1800’s back that you don't trek over to granny's house WITHOUT A WEAPON.
While my post may appear callous it might save some other idiot from being regurgitated into a wolf pups mouth one day.
We’ll probably hear of some baby Bigfoots being spotted in those mountains about a year from now.
Nothing new, the hippies in NM were doing this in the 1980’s out in the Gila Wilderness. (not many bears there, but a few bares) As long as I did not have to look at them it is OK with me, I doubt the wildlife cared except for the smell.
She’s making a spiritual trip through a Cougar’s bowel about now.
Pray for America to Wake Up
I hope she's found OK, or her murderer is put through the same process he put her through.
Yesterday while walking around on my measly 5 acres which is two properties away from BLM land, in a valley surrounded by mountains covered with trees, I saw the hugest pile of mountain lion scat I’ve ever seen.
I figured I’d better be armed with something even walking around in the daytime now.
I’ve seen their tracks, heard them scream, and seen them crossing the road a few times, and seen scat but not lately. But this was a huge pile.
Dumb as a breathatarian...
Bare bear bait baiting bare bears?
Not guilty, your honor.
Doubtless wearing a robe though ...
i think i’d say “God sent me and He wants us to have sex.” could work on this type of gal.
The search has been suspended after finding no sign of the girl.
didn’t find a fanny pack in there did ya’.
Tin horns decide to go back country camping. They must go through a Ranger taught , 1 hr , training course.
Park ranger: “ Now we have 2 species of bear in this park. Black bears and Grizzly bears. If you are walking along and find a print the size of your fist , with 4 strikes in front of where your knuckles would be AND you see scats that have small animal bones and berry seeds , this is most likely a black bear. I am issuing you these little bells. Just ring em and he will usually get scared and run off.
Now if you see a print that is wider than both your fists put together , with 4 four inch long strikes equally spaced AND you see scats the size of your rolled up sleeping bag , with large animal bones in them , you will notice a few of thees little bells. IT’s BECAUSE THIS IS A GRIZZLY BEAR AND THE DAMNED BELLS DONT WORK ON THEM.
She is now one with nature. Nature known as bear scat.
What’s really sad is that nobody stopped her . No friends ? No one with the sense to talk her out of this crazy and dangerous idea . It goes to show ,perhaps, how far gone we are into the ‘whatever’s cool ‘ ‘ not my problem’ state of mind . And even if someone didn’t want to get involved directly ; CALL THE COPS ! right away , get some help for an obviously self destructive deranged girl . Yet nobody did nuthin . THAT is sad indeed . She was someones dear sweet daughter ....
Sad indeed....in many ways. She’s a typical postwestern female. Every culture, every person, every situation is all the same to her. Everyone is equal. No male is going to harm a naked 19 year old girl walking around nude....it’s all about peace & love.
Want to bet who she voted for ? The level of miseducation in her family & schooling helped put her nude & in the woods.
Ummm, sweetie? A spiritual quest is a journey in the spiritual world. No need to roam the physical world while doing so... particularly doing so naked... particularly in an area of the physical world that features copious amounts of wildlife that is dangerous to humans. You don’t stop being human when you’re naked, or spirit-questing, in the eyes of Mother Nature.
Can you imagine what some lonely old crazy hermit must have thought when she strolled up to the wilderness cabin’s front door and asked for directions to the spirit quest? Of course, maybe she just stumbled onto some motorcycle club’s meth lab. The possibilities are endless.