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Admin Error Sends Bradley Manning to Death Row, Nidal Hasan to Gender Reassignment Surgery
Duffelblog ^ | Aug 31, 2013 | ?????

Posted on 08/31/2013 3:50:46 PM PDT by SLB

FT LEAVENWORTH, KS — An administrative error has been blamed for a mix-up in sentencing involving the cases of convicted Fort Hood shooter Maj. Nidal Hasan and Bradley Manning, the Army private convicted of leaking classified documents to the website WikiLeaks.

After sentencing concluded last Wednesday in Fort Hood, Texas, it was reported Hasan would undergo gender reassignment surgery and change his name from Nidal to Nahid Hasan. Nahid is an Arabic name meaning “one with full, round breasts.”

Not long after it was revealed, the traitor formerly known as Chelsea had been transferred to death row where he awaits execution by lethal injection.

Leavenworth officials announced that both gender reassignment and execution have been approved by fiscal offices. Due to end of fiscal year funding constraints, changing these allocations will be too costly in the final quarter.

Sequestration and work furloughs were also cited as possible contributors to the errors, which are now fiscally and administratively impossible to correct. Administrative offices in Leavenworth were unavailable for comment due to a “training holiday.”

Hasan, who had declined to speak on his own behalf previously, is reportedly now quite vocal concerning this turn of events.

“This is egregious,” the former Army psychiatrist said of the mix up. “I’m supposed to get 72 virgins, not turn into one. My mullah screwed me!”

At press time, Manning was unavailable for comment, throwing a hissy fit in his cell. This despite fellow inmates having assured him they would still call him girls names.

Al Jazeera America has reported Al Qaeda rumblings of possibly facilitating an arranged marriage between Hasan and Ayman al-Zawahiri. Since the announcement or the error, Hasan has received multiple proposals of marriage from various Afghan jihadis, including Zawahiri.

“A woman who used to be a man? That’s the best of both worlds,” remarked one jihadi. “Every day will be man-love Thursday!”


TOPICS: Crime/Corruption; Government; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: bradleymanning; chelsealately; forthoodmassacre; hasan; leavenworth; manning; oops; satire

1 posted on 08/31/2013 3:50:46 PM PDT by SLB
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To: SLB
LOLOL!!!!

/johnny

2 posted on 08/31/2013 3:52:11 PM PDT by JRandomFreeper (Gone Galt)
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To: SLB

They caught it too early.


3 posted on 08/31/2013 3:53:41 PM PDT by ansel12 (Obama-[obamacare] "used to be a Republican idea. There's a governor of Massachusetts who set it up.")
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To: SLB

Just put them in the same cell.


4 posted on 08/31/2013 3:55:10 PM PDT by OldNewYork (Biden '13. Impeach now.)
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To: SLB

“Admin Error Sends Bradley Manning to Death Row, Nidal Hasan to Gender Reassignment Surgery”

And the downside to this story is???


5 posted on 08/31/2013 3:57:30 PM PDT by I cannot think of a name
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To: SLB; null and void

Omg, I need to laugh!!!!!!!!!!!! Thank you, thank you, thank you.


6 posted on 08/31/2013 3:58:56 PM PDT by Shimmer1 (Arnold, Arnold, Arnold Rimmer, without him life would be much grimmer.....)
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To: SLB

Obamacare?


7 posted on 08/31/2013 4:02:34 PM PDT by faithhopecharity (E)
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To: SLB

To which I say .... ALLAH AKBAR !


8 posted on 08/31/2013 4:04:53 PM PDT by layman (Card Carrying Infidel)
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To: SLB

LMAO!!!!!


9 posted on 08/31/2013 4:05:05 PM PDT by ScottinVA (Obama is so far in over his head, even his ears are beneath the water level.)
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To: I cannot think of a name
And the downside to this story is???

We'll have created an LBGT Muslim. That should qualify as a crime against humanity.

10 posted on 08/31/2013 4:05:39 PM PDT by tacticalogic ("Oh, bother!" said Pooh, as he chambered his last round.)
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To: SLB

There are many that would volunteer to give the sex change to either one with an ax.


11 posted on 08/31/2013 4:06:00 PM PDT by mountainlion (Live well for those that did not make it back.)
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To: SLB

Bailiff... Whack his peepee.


12 posted on 08/31/2013 4:06:51 PM PDT by ScottinVA (Obama is so far in over his head, even his ears are beneath the water level.)
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To: SLB

ok now that WOULD be funny....


13 posted on 08/31/2013 4:07:43 PM PDT by Mr. K (Lies, Damned Lies, Statistics, and then Democrat Talking Points.)
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To: SLB

ahahahaah
If only


14 posted on 08/31/2013 4:14:18 PM PDT by svcw (Stand or die)
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To: SLB

Well done!


15 posted on 08/31/2013 4:22:56 PM PDT by NonValueAdded (Henceforth, the Office of the President shall be known as IMPOTUS)
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To: SLB

PERFECT!


16 posted on 08/31/2013 4:29:22 PM PDT by LucianOfSamasota (Tanstaafl - its not just for breakfast anymore...)
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To: carriage_hill

Pingalamadingdong.


17 posted on 08/31/2013 4:31:44 PM PDT by lightman (Prosecute the heresies; pity the heretics.)
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To: Slings and Arrows; martin_fierro
Hard to say what kind(s) of ping(s) this ought to get, being satire.

If only it were true....

18 posted on 08/31/2013 4:35:04 PM PDT by dayglored (Listen, strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government!)
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To: SLB

We can demonstrate our compassion by providing a lesbian wedding then send them off on an all expenses paid honeymoon in Saudi Arabia.


19 posted on 08/31/2013 4:41:52 PM PDT by haroldeveryman
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To: dayglored

THE DUFFLEBLOG is a great satirical website!


20 posted on 08/31/2013 4:59:43 PM PDT by Recovering Ex-hippie
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To: 21stCenturion; 75thOVI; Abathar; alarm rider; albee; Alice au Wonderland; Amityschild; ...
INDUSTRIAL STRENGTH
HUMOR

>> PING <<
No amateurs, please.
Send FReepmail if you want on/off ISHP list
The List of Ping Lists

21 posted on 08/31/2013 5:07:21 PM PDT by martin_fierro (< |:)~)
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I’ve always though we should force sex changes on captured terrorists then sell them to high security asian brothels


22 posted on 08/31/2013 5:16:05 PM PDT by dsrtsage (One half of all people have below average IQ. In the US the number is 54%)
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To: SLB

I love the articles “author’s” name.


23 posted on 08/31/2013 5:17:15 PM PDT by RedStateGuyTrappedinCT
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To: RedStateGuyTrappedinCT
"I love the articles “author’s” name."

I bet you like beef chow mein too.

24 posted on 08/31/2013 5:31:02 PM PDT by LegendHasIt
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To: SLB; John Semmens; AdmSmith; AnonymousConservative; Berosus; bigheadfred; Bockscar; cardinal4; ...

:”D


25 posted on 08/31/2013 5:36:40 PM PDT by SunkenCiv (It's no coincidence that some "conservatives" echo the hard left.)
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To: lightman

I had to add the keyword, “satire”, just to keep it accurate. But funny as heck.


26 posted on 08/31/2013 5:47:57 PM PDT by carriage_hill (Peace is that brief glorious moment in history, when everybody stands around reloading.)
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To: SLB

Very good :)


27 posted on 08/31/2013 5:50:05 PM PDT by novemberslady (Texas For President)
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To: SLB

Nice find. lol!


28 posted on 08/31/2013 5:54:49 PM PDT by FreedomPoster (Islam delenda est)
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To: SLB

AS funny, improbable as it may be, the implementation of consequences to the incorrect recipients would serve justice just as well.


29 posted on 08/31/2013 6:12:23 PM PDT by lbryce (The 22nd Amendment Lives:1142 Days Until America's Greatest Nemesis Gets the Heave "Ho")
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To: SLB; doug from upland
LOL!
a true classic. :-D only way to improve it..let Hitler rage about.

30 posted on 08/31/2013 6:24:36 PM PDT by skinkinthegrass (who'll take tomorrow,$pend it all today;who can take your income & tax it all away..0'Blowfly can :-)
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To: SLB

YAWN!!!!


31 posted on 08/31/2013 6:27:35 PM PDT by xrmusn (6/98 --Egoist:A person of low taste, more interested in himself than me. (Ambrose Bierce))
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To: SLB; Chode

Think about it. If this really happened it would be justice.


32 posted on 08/31/2013 6:45:58 PM PDT by Morgana (Always a bit of truth in dark humor.)
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To: Morgana
if this isn't satire, it's toooo damn funny...
33 posted on 08/31/2013 7:15:56 PM PDT by Chode (Stand UP and Be Counted, or line up and be numbered - *DTOM* -ww- NO Pity for the LAZY)
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To: martin_fierro

Good Lord, Martin. That pic is SO wrong, on SO many levels... I love it!


34 posted on 08/31/2013 7:20:49 PM PDT by dayglored (Listen, strange women lying in ponds distributing swords is no basis for a system of government!)
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To: SLB

What a cool site (duffelblog)! Thanks for posting.


35 posted on 08/31/2013 7:42:44 PM PDT by Joann37
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To: ScottinVA

Oldie but a goodie.


36 posted on 08/31/2013 7:50:32 PM PDT by rabidralph (Gray State Movie)
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To: martin_fierro

Damn you, Martin Fierro! I almost woke up my husband laughing at that picture!! ;-p


37 posted on 08/31/2013 8:01:04 PM PDT by TheOldLady
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To: SLB

Nice idea!


38 posted on 08/31/2013 8:07:42 PM PDT by TBP (Obama lies, Granny dies.)
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To: SLB

OMG! ROFL...!


39 posted on 08/31/2013 8:50:00 PM PDT by oldoverholt
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Comment #40 Removed by Moderator

To: SLB

Fix em both and send them to the firing squad.


41 posted on 08/31/2013 9:20:16 PM PDT by eggman (End the Obama occupation of the White House!)
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To: martin_fierro

Wickedly wrong on countless counts.


42 posted on 09/01/2013 1:31:13 AM PDT by Admin Moderator
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To: ScottinVA; martin_fierro; Charles Henrickson
it was reported Hasan would undergo gender reassignment surgery

Hasan ... CHOP!

43 posted on 09/01/2013 6:28:23 PM PDT by mikrofon ('Sinbad taste ;)
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To: SLB; 3D-JOY; abner; Abundy; AGreatPer; Albion Wilde; AliVeritas; alisasny; ALlRightAllTheTime; ...

So there IS justice after all!

Combined PING/DANG!


44 posted on 09/02/2013 4:50:27 AM PDT by Tolerance Sucks Rocks (Major brain damage at UMES, but no property damage!)
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To: Tolerance Sucks Rocks

Thanks...fun to read and DREAM about it!


45 posted on 09/03/2013 11:45:24 AM PDT by 3D-JOY
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To: SLB
Someone in Syria will be in for a big surprise when his virgins show up!

-PJ

46 posted on 09/03/2013 11:48:38 AM PDT by Political Junkie Too (If you are the Posterity of We the People, then you are a Natural Born Citizen.)
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