Skip to comments.Gene Lyons: ‘Duck Dynasty’ star destined to fade into obscurity
Posted on 01/01/2014 7:42:20 PM PST by 2ndDivisionVet
Now that Ive actually seen a few episodes, Duck Dynasty is relatively harmless entertainment. Whatever reality TV means, its definitely not that. Its a semi-scripted sitcom, basically cornball self-parody. Think Hee Haw without the music. I find it utterly inane, but then I dont watch TV with children.
The tell is the shows women, cute Southern sorority girls turned mommies. In real life, no way would those women tolerate their menfolk running around looking like a truckload of ZZ-Top impersonators. Theyre also not going on TV with hay in their hair like some Hollywood directors idea of a country girl. Every comedy needs a straight man; on Duck Dynasty its the women.
But realism? Please. The beards, hair and overalls are costumes every bit as theatrical as the outfits the Rolling Stones wear onstage. In the rural Arkansas county where I live, you could hang around the feed store for a month without seeing anybody like Duck Dynasty patriarch (and head bigot) Phil Robertson. And if you did, his wife wouldnt have any teeth.
The Robertsons are country-clubbers posing as rednecks. Duck hunting itself requiring, as it does, quite a bit of expensive gear and pricey leases is mainly a rich mans pastime in the South. Deer hunting makes economic sense; duck huntings a luxury. Its what doctors, lawyers and bankers do when the weathers too lousy for golf. Bill Clinton used to go duck hunting once a year to prove he loved guns.
How long, I wonder, before the Duck Dynasty boys endorse the Bad Boy brand of riding mowers? Currently represented by a half-clothed model urging guys to Get a Bad Boy, Baby!, these machines have the magical capacity to convert a tax accountant mowing a suburban half-acre under his wifes supervision to a daredevil NASCAR racer. Yee Haw!
But the laughter ended abruptly when Duck Commander Phil Robertson inserted himself into the nations vituperative culture wars. The whole thing looked like a publicity stunt gone wrong possibly successful in the short run, but almost certain to prove destructive in the end.
Concerning which, a few thoughts:
First, Sarah Palin and Louisiana Gov. Bobby Jindal notwithstanding, nobody has a First Amendment right to appear on TV. Make controversial public pronouncements deeply offensive to your employers, and youd better have a backup plan.
The creator and producer of Duck Dynasty is one Scott Gurney, who once appeared in a gay-themed film called The Fluffer. (Dont ask.)
The guy helps make you rich and famous, and you denounce gays as evil? Thats appalling.
Second, it has nothing to do with Christianity. Robertson didnt just say hes against gay marriage, nor even that God is. He spoke in the coarsest possible terms about homosexuality, equating it with bestiality.
Hes also characterized gay men and women as full of murder, envy, strife, hatred. They are insolent, arrogant, god-haters, they are heartless, they are faithless, they are senseless, they are ruthless, they invent ways of doing evil.
Third, 10 years ago, many of the same people portraying Robertson as a martyr burned Dixie Chicks CDs and cheered their banishment from country radio stations for the terrible crime of saying they were embarrassed by George W. Bush before everybody was.
And those girls have genuine talent.
Fourth, as for the happy, singing darkies of Robertsons Louisiana childhood, where are they on Duck Dynasty? Know what the African-American population of Monroe/West Monroe is? Its roughly 60 percent. Ive seen no black faces on the program.
Another prominent American from West Monroe is Boston Celtics great Bill Russell a black man whos been known to have strong opinions about race. Maybe Robertson ought to talk with him, although it wouldnt be easy.
Duck Dynasty may be this months right wing cause celebre. Longer term, however, unapologetic bigots always fade into obscurity, basically because they embarrass people.
Uh, Gene, here's an article from 2005, well before the television show was ever thought of. He sure looks pretty much the same as today, doesn't he?
well what about the Democratic millionaires who go around with a ponytail yech
Unlike the world renowned Gene Loins....er Lyons.
I think someone needs to check Gene's loafers.
Phil Robertson’s passion is NOT “Duck Dynasty.” At a guess I’d say his passions are Jesus, Miss Kay,his family and ducks. The tv show is duck gravy.
More facial profiling from an unabashed facist.
You are right on the money
btw... who is Gene Lyons? and why would we care what he or she or it has to say?
I guess its easy to fade into obscurity when you’re already there, eh Gene? I’ve never heard of you. Face it, this was a humiliation for the homo lobby.
And your shock as homosexuals being compared to zoophiles reveals your own ‘bigotry’. Welcome to the club.
The woman who wrote this will be fired when it is demonstrated she did absolutely no research whatsoever before she penned this garbage. If the paper wasn’t anything but a democratic godless communist rag.
I have never watched Duck Dynasty but who the hell is this Gene jackass?
Shut up and sit down Gene.
What's appalling is the perverted practices of feces-obsessed homosexuals.
The DD family was rich well before A&E had ever heard of them.
" Robertson didnt just say hes against gay marriage, nor even that God is. He spoke in the coarsest possible terms about homosexuality, equating it with bestiality."
Sickening perversion should be described in accurate terms, which unfortunately necessitates a degree of "coarseness." Besides, are you going to try and pretend to faint at the use of "vagina?" What about those feminuts and their Vagina Monologue? Were you yapping at them about coarseness?
"Fourth, as for the happy, singing darkies of Robertsons Louisiana childhood, where are they on Duck Dynasty? Know what the African-American population of Monroe/West Monroe is? Its roughly 60 percent. Ive seen no black faces on the program. "
Who cares? Whites are (still) a majority in the nation, but how many of them do you see on BET?
Is his middle name Mary?
Another southern liberal sh**head in the mold of James Carville.
I think the gist of this hit piece is guys like this one (the writer) and his ilk are flat out scared of the Duck Dynasty folks. And what they represent...
Thus the bravado
Gene Lyons is an idiot, always has been, always will be.
He has no clue about what the women in Duck Dynasty would tolerate.
Gene lives in Arkansas and acts like he doesn’t know who these people are. What a liar! They were famous before A & E and will be after A & E. Their public appearances are book for years (the whole family). They all have their own bookings. They have restaurants, dress shops, albums, cookbooks, etc. besides all the duck merchandise. I doubt they’ll disappear any time soon as much as the brainiac Gene Lyons wishes they would.
Nut job...and Clinton *ss kisser...
Gene Lyons is a liberal political columnist and co-author with Joe Conason of The Hunting of the President: The 10 Year Campaign to Destroy Bill and Hillary Clinton, a documentary book published in 2000, with a supporting film. The book outlines a purported right wing campaign waged against President of the United States Bill Clinton leading eventually to the president’s impeachment because he lied under oath about having extramarital sexual relations with a White House intern. It extends the discussion in Lyons’ 1996 book Fools for Scandal: How the Media Invented Whitewater
Gene! You ignorant slut!
“Every comedy needs a straight man; on Duck Dynasty its the women.”
So is he saying that feminist types who don’t wear makeup are like gay men?
Gene Lyons: a mediocre writer not only destined to fade into obscurity but already faded into it.
Lying Gene Lyons as we call him in Arkansas. If his mouth is moving he’s a lyon!
” Ive seen no black faces on the program.”
Willie and Korie have a son named Will....who is adopted and Black. Not “black”, you moron. And you get published? LOL
The author does look like a “fluffer”
lyons is all over the map and bouncing off the walls on this.
ooo no blacks in the show....OOO OOO proof of white privlege!
“Hey! Look at me everybody! I write for the Arkansas Times! My opinion is important!!!”
Robertson didn't say anything about "gay marriage" or for that matter "equated" it to bestiality.
He was talking about sin. Did Lyons even READ the GQ article? Phil had something to say about promiscuity, drunkenness, theft and swindling, too.
I guess that Lyons thinks THOSE are just peachy.
Lyons is just spewing the EXACT SAME WORDS as every other liberal out there about "gays and bestiality".
Like a good robotic liberal, know nothing about the topic, make up a strawman, and come to some conclusion about "stupid rednecks".
Gene, YOU are the real hater. Not everyone who lives in rural America is a toothless hick.
It's an ugly stereotype, and you revealed your OWN bigotry by calling black people "darkies".
As if that word has been commonly used in oh, about 90 years.
My second one the same a year and a half later I was deployed. I cut it between deployments for a three month time frame because I was assigned fire department duties on the ship. Since 1980 my face has been beardless only 15 months total LOL. Twelve months beardless was for the Army NG and three months was for a highly visible to the public job at the 1982 Worlds Fair and I needed that job.
With my hair now at my shoulders and gray turning mainly white some kids at the store call me Santa LOL. I don't mind and find it amusing.
Since Phil and sons are avid outdoorsmen a beard is functional and practical. It's a decent sun screen, it naturally hides much of the face thus less camo needed, and their wives like mine might prefer them with a beard although my wife has only seen pictures of me without a beard.
“I ain’t askin’ nobody for nothin’,
If I can’t get it on my own.
You don’t like the way I’m livin’,
You just leave this long-haired country boy alone.”
If I remember correctly, this is the same clown who covered for Slick Willie during the 8 years Slick was in the Oval Office. He must be checking in for his SECOND "15 minutes" just in case Slick Willie's wife is elected El Presidente.
Gene used to live in the best section of Little Rock, when and why did he move.
Proving that he's lying about having watched the show.
There are several episodes that include Phils bi-racial adopted grandson
Ummm, I don’t think Phil gives a $h!t, he’s said the show will end.
The preacher man says it’s the end of time
And the Mississippi River, she’s a going dry
The interest is up and the stock markets down
And you only get mugged if you go downtown
I live back in the woods, you see
My woman and the kids and the dogs and me
I got a shotgun and a rifle and a four wheel drive
And a countryboy can survive, country folks can survive
I can plow a field all day long, I can catch catfish from dusk ‘til dawn
Make our own whiskey and our own smoke too
Ain’t too many things these boys can’t do
We grow good old tomatoes and homemade wine
And countryboy can survive, country folk can survive
Because you can’t stomp us out and you can’t make us run
‘Cause we’re them ol’ boys raised on shotguns
We say grace and we say ma’am
And if you ain’t into that, we don’t give a damn
We came from the West Virginia coal mines
And the Rocky Mountains and the Western skies
And we can skin a buck, we can run a trout line
And a countryboy can survive, country folks can survive
I had a good friend in New York City
He never called me by my name just hillbilly
My Grandpa taught me how to live off the land
And his taught him to be a business man
He used to send me pictures of the Broadway Nights
And I would send him some homemade wine
But he was killed by a man with a switchblade knife
For forty three dollars, my friend lost his life
I’d love to spit some beechnut in that dudes eyes
And shoot him with my ol’ forty-five
‘Cause a countryboy can survive
Country folks can survive
‘Cause you can’t stomp us out and you can’t make us run
And we’re them ol’ boys raised on shotgun
We say grace, we say ma’am
If you ain’t into that, we don’t give a damn
We’re from North California and South Alabama
And little towns all around this land
We can skin a buck and run a trot line
And a countryboy can survive, country folks can survive
Countryboy can survive, country folks can survive
Hank Williams Jr. - A Countryboy Can Survive
Now that is funny!
Lyons is an oxygen pirate....
I make six figures. and i think phil jace and jep are HOT. then again i used to ride a HD.
I agree. This is “fear.” You can tell by how these lib pundits not only make floundering arguments, but are lashing out in such an atypically overboard and haphazard manner. Something about “Duck Dynasty” REALLY unnerves them. Same thing we saw (and still do, to a great degree) in their reactions to Sarah Palin.
My guess? They fear mid-America. They fear its numbers. And its potential to one day wake up and to organize into a populist revolt against their entire cultural/political agenda. If this mid-America genuinely gets together and revolts, they will be quashed like the metrosexual, pajama-boy insects they are. And they know it. It’s like a field of dry grass, ready for a match.
Just another "BEM." Booger Eating Moron publishing "horse hockey."
Who’s Gene Lyons?
I can imagine no better fate than to become a multi-millionaire and then to “fade into obscurity”.
This now becoming as ridiculous as the monthly “Palin soon to fade away” articles written by people who wish they had a fraction of Palin’s notoriety.
That line right there would have a bunch of my buddies laughing their asses off.
Don't think that bastard has ever been in a duck blind.
hahahahahahah lololololol what a loser
As I’ve said before, I wish someone would “Palinize” me. I’d be a world-famous multi-millionaire, still looked at as a presidential candidate, paid $50,000 to give a short speech, have 3 million followers on Facebook and about a million on Twitter, three NYT best-sellers, a paycheck from a TV news network and two nice homes.