Rob Schneider: "Sure I'm grateful for the paramedics pulling me out of my burning car. But they didn't have to dislocate my shoulder.
Why can't my shoulder be back the way it was, before?"
Chris Farley, on tennis court: "Sure the construction site was labeled No Trespassing, but that what does that mean to someone who was as drunk as I was? They can have their 2.6 million back, but who'll give me back my tooth?"
