Skip to comments.USMC Best Joke of the Year
Posted on 03/22/2014 5:15:32 PM PDT by Din Maker
A Marine squad was marching north of Fallujah when they came upon an Iraqi terrorist who was badly injured and unconscious. On the opposite side of the road was an American Marine in a similar but less serious state. The Marine was conscious and alert and as first aid was given to both men, the squad leader asked the injured Marine what had happened. The Marine reported, "I was heavily armed and moving north along the highway here, and coming south was a heavily armed insurgent. We saw each other and both took cover in the ditches along the road. I yelled to him that Saddam Hussein was a miserable, lowlife scum bag who got what he deserved. And he yelled back that Barack Obama is a lying, good-for-nothing, left wing Communist who isn't even an American. So I said that Ahmadinejad acts and dresses like a frigid, mean-spirited lesbian! He retaliated by yelling, Oh yeah? Well, so does Nancy Pelosi!. And, there we were, in the middle of the road, shaking hands, when a truck hit us."
truly the one thing we share with the SOB’s is disasteriously crappy politicians
HA! Great joke.
This requires some visualization:
What does the Army call the UH-60 helicopter?
What does the Navy call it?
And the Marines?
Jump up and down grunting and pointing sky excitedly.
There was a version of this for Vietnam, “to Hell with LBJ” “to Hell with Ho Chi Minh”, same punchline.
Fixed it fer ya!
Isn’t Bob short for Richard? What is also, ah never mind. Not going to lower myself to your level.
Nah, Bob is short for Robert...though you might know know that. Oh, well...Semper Fi, anyhow....
“Isnt Bob short for Richard?”
Bob > Robert
Dick > Richard
HA HA HA HA HA!
Not quite sure where Gamecock was goin’ with that one...bet his Latin ain’t much better;-)
My Dad told me the WWII version: occupied Japan, a frustrated Yank who never saw combat yells at the first Japanese he sees, “Tojo is a no-good worthless war criminal!!”
The Jap yells back, “Your MacArthur is ten times worse and thinks he’s G-d!!”
The Yank recalls, “Then, just as we were shaking hands, a jeep musta run over us!”
DG69, the Gamecock didn’t get under my hide...hell, I’ll even give a Squid one shot, but poke me, yer gonna get poked back. No animosity, what so ever.
Semper Fi, Brother!
Retread, but always funny! LOL
If my memory serves (read the book fifty some years ago), a Marine shouts out at night to the Japanese line:
Tojo eats sh!t!
From the Japanese line comes back:
Rosever' eat sh!t!
Pyle wrote that the Marine, evidently a Republican, shouted back:
You damn straight he does!
“Not quite sure where Gamecock was goin with that one...bet his Latin aint much better;-)”
It’s Saturday night. Who knows!
good one!............sent it on to many!
I owe my hide to the Corps because of two of your finest saved me from a nasty ordeal years ago. I want you to know that their money was no good for their entire liberty. May God bless and keep the UNITED STATES MARINE CORPS always.
Didn`t expect that...too funny! I`m passing it on.
Very good. Sent to my Marine son.
If you want to read another Ernie Pyle book, try “Here is Your War: Story of G.I. Joe”, World Publishing Co., 1945, about the No. Africa campaigns.
Written/published shortly before Pyle was killed in the Pacific.
He was one of America’s best war correspondents who never lost sight of the quality and valor of the American fighting man.
Madmax, Nam journalist, Fall 1970
That’s a good one
Our most exciting time at sea was when the Marine pilots were doing their carrier quals ...
Now I’ve got to get the windex and paper towels and clean my screen.
You got it right.
LST 1160 + LST 532.
In the Gator Fleet we say
“You Call We Haul” (No
matter what or who)
My friend was in the Marines for 9 years in the 60s-70s. He and I went to buy a rifle from some old guy wearing a Vietnam Vet cap and he couldn’t talk enough about his Army days over there. He finally took a break from his tales to ask my buddy if he served and when he heard he had been in the Marines, the guy said, “Oh, I wanted to join the Marines, but my parents were married.” I’m sure it’s an old one, but it took me by surprise.
Joke from Nazi Germany—the teller was sent to a Concentration camp for telling it.
“Hitler and Gobbles were on top of a new Radio tower in Berlin. below the masses were cheering to them.
Hitler turns to Gobbles and says, “The people have really suffered. I wish I could do something to cheer them up.”
Gobbles answers, “ You can, just Jump.”
My compliments to all those “bastard” Marines!
Ha! Common ground.
I really enjoyed that laugh, after an extra long day! Thanks for the joke
Huh, so that's why so many people were unimpressed when I told 'em the "LBJ's a jerk" joke I'd just heard. Now I'm wondering just how far back into history that one goes. Still doesn't change the fact it's a great joke though...
Heh heh... for all we know now (since it’s beyond living memory) there’s a WWI version, a Civil War version, a Napoleonic War version, a Rome vs Carthage version... :’)
And who does an AF Sergeant call? The golf course to get a tee time.
Well, not that funny.