Skip to comments.How Personal Relationships Threaten The Power of the State
Posted on 05/07/2014 5:43:36 PM PDT by 2ndDivisionVet
Marriage is the new bogeyman for our progressive friends. Its worth asking why that is the case.
Consider this recent Slate article entitled: Just Say No: For White Working Class Women, it Makes Sense to Stay Single Mothers. The co-authors Naomi Cahn and June Carbone both seem well connected to the school of feminist legal theory that claims marriage is generally an outmoded and patriarchal institution. So perhaps it should come as no surprise they would be interested in discouraging it for yet another demographic: white, working-class mothers.
Cahn and Carbone walk readers through their case study of Lily, employed but possibly pregnant by her boyfriend Carl, whos unemployed and aimless. Were told that Lily is not concerned about raising the child alone. She views Carl as more of a hindrance than a help, essentially just another mouth to feed.
The Slate piece rounds up various statistics and trends socio-economic, cultural, and so on to make the case against marriage for Lily and all women of her class and color. The authors emphasize that men are less marketable these days, while working class women are increasingly more employable. They then argue that both men and women generally agree that a man who cant hold a steady job shouldnt marry. Complicating matters further is that the men who do have better economic prospects, faced with a choice of committing to a woman who outearns them or keeping their independence seem to prefer their freedom. They conclude that the dearth of marriageable men should convince Lily shes better off going it alone. (Amusingly, the authors here seem to borrow from an old-timey explanation of the facts of life regarding male behavior, like mother-scolds saying, Hes just not marriage material, Honey.)
There is a ream of statistics on the other side...
(Excerpt) Read more at thefederalist.com ...
Maybe they shouldn’t be dating these losers in the first place?
So you’re not “pro-choice?” [chuckle]
Lots of single mothers gives big brother something to wail about when they need to hand out more bribes in the form of welfare.
Liberalism is the ultimate in selfishness. What may be best for your child be damned, do what makes you happy!
Basically, liberals don’t advance far beyond the terrible twos
Keep in mind that radical collectivsts of all stripes, from Thomas Moore to Marx, see the elimination of the family as a central goal of their philosophies.
It’s no surprise to see yet another unimaginative leftist trying to tear down the basis of civilization. Total dependency upon the state leviathan is the ultimate goal, and strong families are one of the many things that enable self-sufficiency and independence, both things that collectivists shudder at the thought of. Better in their eyes to create an entire generation of emotionally stunted, socially inept, intellectually feeble dependents subservient to the welfare state.
“Women with bad taste in men find it’s better single” -new title
“I only dated him because he had a guitar and a cute butt” she says “was that wrong?”
The authors neglect option (C): skip the career-minded women, and pick a woman who WANTS to be a wife and mother.
I would rather be married to an affectionate and cheerful waitress than a bad-tempered feminist professor.
Plus, there are literally MILLIONS of nice women in Asia, the Pacific, South/Central America, the Caribbean and the former Soviet Union who would JUMP at the chance to marry a Western man.
Here in the Dallas area there are many Korean and Vietnamese enclaves. I’ve noticed that the AVERAGE car there is an E-Class Mercedes, a 5-Series BMW, an Acura SUV or a Lexus.
What does she need with a husband?
A father for her son? Why?
There is no need, she can have the fathers in scouts, and sports league(s), to teach their sons how to be men, or not...or they could all become faggots.
I am inundated with the progeny of these women. These boys can’t throw, can’t catch, can’t swing, can’t hit, can’t think, can’t do anything, including following directions. They are afraid of their own shadows. They send them to us to turn them into (?), what they are expecting back isn’t a man.
If you are successful with even one, even partially, you are truly doing the Lord’s work, I would think.
I am in the little leagues ( board of directors, league director, and manager of two teams, one for each of my sons. Cub scouts, as a den leader, and pack cub-master.
I try to teach all these boys how to be men. How to act like good sports and be gracious winners. To be a chivalrous, well mannered, well spoken, well read, and a well experienced man able to do anything for themselves. I do the best I can for them, knowing what awaits them on the other side.
The men of my childhood were World War I & II, Korea and recently returned Vietnam veterans and others of those eras. Even if I hadn’t had a father I don’t think I would have had many problems with role models.
This is how you destroy a culture and a first World country.
We are of similar experience. My father was a WWII vet, my father’s father was a WWI vet, virtually all of the kids in the neighborhood had fathers in the home and they were WWII or Korea Vets.
There are a number of nice American girls who would like the idea of being a wife and mother. I've been married to one for three decades. Her advantage was she had never been to college and was never contaminated by the feminists.
She likes telling me after I make a particularly politically-incorrect observation about women "That's sexist!". I respond, "Maybe, but it's true!".
The latest was over my telling my daughter that she would be best off finding a good man to marry in her early 20's, before the best ones were taken, and to be open to dating guys in their mid-late 20's (ones who have demonstrated they can get and keep a decent job). My wife thought it was sexist, but I looked up and showed her the research on the probability of ever getting married dropping sharply if you waited til 30.
In their early 20's, women spurn young men who have good career prospects in favor of charming guys with cute butts and guitars.
They then turn 30, discover that the charming guys are no longer interested in their sagging bodies, are now chasing the latest batch of cute 20-somethings, and decide to finally "settle" for the "boring" men they rejected. They are then shocked to find out that the "boring" men have better prospects, and are going after the 20-somethings.
There is another trend out here in California and many other states.
Talented young people with good jobs in their mid 20’s to mid 40’s often have jobs that don’t fit into the marriage patterns we grew up with.
These people produce at work and are talented in their endeavors. As a result if they work for a large company, they often travel a lot to help non producers. Two high traveling parents are not a good mix for marriage.
Also, they could be promoted and transferred in a blink of an eye. If they turn down that promotion/transfer, they may have committed corporate suicide with that company. With our lack of job market combined with career driven people, being married and staying in one place to have and raise kids is not in their plans/life style.
If they opt to stay in one place, and one person with a high demand/pay job becomes the stay at home person, the stay at home person often becomes very bitter and resentful.
If they have any kids and both work, the kids are often farmed off to day care before they can really walk or talk. Successful day care centers are very expensive and can be very selective re the kids they allow to use their facilities. The good ones here have long waiting lists and like to have the second and third kids of a couple, which sent their first born to that day care center.
When the kids get into mid school, the parental stress increases with each kid and each kids’s athletic abilities and mental abilities. The kids often start training like junior pro athletes. They have after school practice, games on weekends, summer camps to improve their skill or competitive dancing classes after class each day and performances on the weekends. If the couple is lucky, they have grandparents close buy to help. Sometimes when the grandparents retire. The grandparents move close by to be van drivers, monitors and food providers.
The smart and talented 20-40 year olds often see their older sibs and friends in these never ending treadmills with their kids, and they opt out of marriage and children totally.
In the meantime, the zero talented and motivated ones breed like rabbits and produce more of the same.