Skip to comments.The Scary Reason Some Men Like Guns Better Than Women (Barf Alert)
Posted on 06/27/2014 11:19:26 PM PDT by nickcarraway
The first time I lived alone, my third year of college, I rented a tiny apartment from the type of university-town pseudo-slumlord youre familiar with if you went to a big state school in a smallish city. His name was Rob, and I wasnt scared of him or of living on my own until I sat down in his office to go over the lease and saw a sign hanging above his desk. It said, 10 reasons why a handgun is better than a woman.
(8) If you admire a friend's handgun, and tell him so, he will probably let you try it out a few times. (6) Your handgun will stay with you even if you are out of ammo. (4) Handguns function normally every day of the month.
I have been lucky enough not to know too many violent men in my life. And even though I grew up in a part of the country where hunting and gun shows are common, and gun laws are relatively lax, I didnt know many gun enthusiasts, either. The landlords list rattled me. I thought of that scene in Kubricks Full Metal Jacket, where the drill sergeant barks, You will give your rifle a girl's name, because this is the only pussy you people are going to get."
When I read that list over my landlords shoulder, it was years before George Sodini mass-murdered women in a fitness center in 2009. Before Elliot Rodger went on a killing spree to teach women a lesson. Before social media helped us catalogue dozens of disparate murders every month in which women were killed by men they knew and, at one point in time, loved. The headlines have come to reflect the message of the list in a way that is chillingly consistent: These men control guns. These men wish they controlled women. These men use guns to control women. What was once perceived as the stuff of womens-studies classes has become routine news analysis.
Rather than back away from the theme, the gun lobby is leaning into it. A recent episode of "Noir," a National Rifle Associationsponsored web series by a popular YouTube vlogger and gun enthusiast named Colion Noir, features a sexy shot of a woman in Jimmy Choos, alone on a dark street. Unaffected elegance. Too cool elegance. Not for you elegance, you say. There's got to be something wrong with her; that attitude, high maintenance, hiding something. The voice-over continues, She's not easy, and she's not flawless. But she's never wasted her time thinking about it. Its the sort of feminine ideal put forth in a million lad-mag profiles.
She is the HK MR556.
Oh, wait. Shes a gun. "The HK MR556 is that gun that if it's like that girl who's unbelievably attractive, she has this presence about her that seems untouchable, and she's not apologetic about her beauty, Noir goes on to say. A good gun is like a good woman. Seemingly unattainable, but actually available for purchase. Difficult, but something you can master and control. The woman in the Jimmy Choos might decide to leave you, sue you for alimony, take up with another man. But the gun, which has all of the womans best attributes, will always be there and never ask you for anything. The NRA video aired less than a month after the Isla Vista killings, which were committed by a guy who failed to own the best women, so he bought the best guns instead.
Conflating women and guns is nothing new. Anyone who's been to a gun show will tell you theyre rife with bumper stickers commenting on the relative utility of women versus firearms (like: My wife YES, My dog MAYBE, My gun NEVER!) and jokes about bloodsucking ex-wives. In her book Gun Show Nation, Joan Burbick tells a story about being barred from a firearms show because she was carrying a camera. When she asked why no photography was allowed, the organizer gave her a one-word answer: alimony. The gun enthusiasts didnt want their photos showing up anywhere their ex-wives might see them.
Wives were threats. Girlfriends were threats. Women who talked too much were threats, Burdick continues. And women who held public office and wouldn't shut up were the scourge of the land. I have also picked up bumper stickers at gun shows that said: I JUST GOT A GUN FOR MY WIFE. IT'S THE BEST TRADE I EVER MADE. You can own a gun. Physically and legally take possession of it. Theres no fear of rejection. It cant divorce you. It cant ask for alimony payments. You pull the trigger, it responds.
Paradoxically, the NRA also actively courts female members. Come explore, connect, celebrate and unite with the women of NRA, beckons the NRA Women's channel, alongside clips with names like Armed and Fabulous and Love at First Shot. (Theyre stories of empowered women like you, per the site.) Companies offering products like pink rifles and bra holsters promise to help women look feminine, look good, and still feel safe.
In light of all the messages comparing women to guns, its strangely easy to see the you-go-girl appeal of these pseudo-feminist campaigns: If youre in control of a firearm, its harder for men to conflate you with it. But they can still use it against you. When women are on the receiving end of so much intimate gun violence, its difficult to argue that widespread, easy access can only empower them. For years the NRA defended laws that kept guns in the hands of known domestic abusers. Which makes it all the more chilling to recall the No. 1 reason on my college landlords list of reasons why guns are better than women: You can buy a silencer for a handgun. The sickening truth is you can buy a silencer for a woman. Its a called a handgun.
The American Revolution began when the British tried to disarm the Colonists.
The British military governor of Massachusetts reasoned that the Colonists did not need weapons. After all, there hadn’t been an Indian attack in years.
Which side of that battle would you have been on Ann?
What a hoplophobe.
The author should hitch a ride on SpaceX’s Dragon and space themself.
A truly putrid article demonizing men. This is feminist supremacy writ large
“Before Elliot Rodger went on a killing spree to teach women a lesson”
By killing four men and two women. yeah, right.
What a clueless dolt. I pity whoever ends up with her
All it takes is a pseudo-serious/humorous sign to make metrosexuals wet their pants and obey me? I’ll have to remember that if I ever become a landlord.
Who knows, but it that situation, I wonder if she would have been happy to let a man with a weapon rescue her?
I think I just threw up in my mouth a little bit.
This idiot actually doesn’t realize that the list is funny. Does he freak the hell out like this when a guitarist compares playing his guitar to making love to a beautiful woman?
Damn guitar enthusiasts. They’re all about rape. /s
I do not wish to read another article like this one.
OMG. The author is a chick.
She needs to buy a clue. Men name all kinds of inanimate objects after women. It ain’t just guns, darlin’.
I bet she’s one of those mirror-holding, vajayjay-examining feminazi wimmens.
OJ’s preferred “woman-silencer” was a KNIFE. Oh well, at least she spared us a lecture on the phallic symbolism of gun-barrel length! /s
"The first time I lived alone, my third year of college,"
I guess that explains it.
I think there are also lists of why beer is better than a woman, a dog is better than a woman, a sports car is better than a woman, and a sailboat is better than a woman. Probably more than that. Can’t wait for her articles on those.
I bet she doesn’t let a man, period.
LOL.... 43 reasons why dogs are better than women.
Oh the author is female, it reads differently now, she has man issues. Wonder if she has the feminist “Top ten reasons a woman is better than a man” sign.
There was a study in 1992 of over 200,000 homicides that showed that only 20% of men who commit murder use a gun to kill their wife or spouse, but 60% of women who murder their husbands or boyfriends use a gun.
“...women are on the receiving end of so much intimate gun violence...”
Ms Friedman dad a hissy fit and decided to print it. Provides verification of the fact that libs have no sense of humor.
I named my Harley Alison. The in-the-flesh Alison tried to kill me once. Harley Alison twice!
my handgun doesn’t break stuff that i then have to fix.
my handgun doesn’t yammer on and on just to hear itself talk.
my handgun doesn’t conversationally ambush me
my handgun doesn’t ask me questions that aren’t really questions.
You are probably right. I won't ask the obvious question.
Ugh, figures it was Sinkspur. Feel sorry for his wife, if he has one.
Very good Freudian slip, there.
lotsa ships named after women. how awfully sexist, and how she ignored this i don’t know.
she forgets women have made why shoes are better than men lists, why shopping is better than men lists, why cats are better than men lists, etc.
she needs to grow up and deal with humor. laugh it off b/c you gals do the same crap, honey.
Yep. My late husband had a name for his bass boat. He and a friend built it at another friend’s boat company.
You cannot survive that question unscathed.
In the good ole days hurricanes were named after women.
Now, what was that?
“LOL.... 43 reasons why dogs are better than women.”
Well, I did have a black lab once that would put empties in the trash and bring me another beer. She would also...
Bring me the TV guide if I snapped my fingers and pointed at the TV.
Bring me an ashtray ( yes, even a full one without spilling it) if I made a motion like flicking an ash with my hand.
She was also the best birddog in three counties!
My handgun never asks me if its butt looks too big in its holster.
I’ve never uttered the word “darling” in my life. ;p
Magic 8 Ball says Yes!
I know, right?
I dated a bass fisherman for a while. He and his friends all named their boats. It was a competition to see who could come up with the best name every time one of them got a new boat. They also named their rods & reels.
“laugh it off b/c you gals do the same crap, honey.”
I can only surmise that women like this are the target audience for the article ran last week in the Wall Street Journal, about the joy of cooking for pets (really).
I noticed this when my wife and I went looking for house shortly before we got married. Gun violence in Wisconsin outside Milwaukee is pretty rare despite the millions of firearms. I assume Ann would swoon at the sight of a gun in the open. The gun might load itself and try to shoot the poor girl.
I was going to say writ poorly.
Frankly, I think that some of what she wrote is just fantasy, at least from the perspective of how ‘this gun thing’ personally affected her. There may have been commercials, or even passages from other books, but her personalization connection to them likely does not exist.
She’s just a NYT Blair, or a New Republic Glass in my opinion.
Every woman I ever dated, I took them shooting. And they all loved it.
One of the few times I actually read the article before spouting off.
I’m never going to get that time back.
If I were to go through that experience again, I'd name the gun "Ann."
Gadzooks! Are they remaking “Beetlejuice?”
Because you can have as many as you want and the other’s don’t get jealous? Actually I think my PTR-91 does get jealous sometimes, or did until the boating accident.