Skip to comments.Thought the Republicans Were Nuts? Wait 'til Bat**** Craziness of Next Week's Democratic Debate
Posted on 10/08/2015 1:22:45 PM PDT by ppaul
I started with a simple enough question: how do I watch the October 13 Democratic debate on CNN? And I wound up learning the answer to so many more questions I didn't know I had. Among those answers: Cheryl Crow, virtual reality, Las Vegas, and maybe Joe Biden or maybe not.
Crazily, CNN itself seems to be offering no information about whether they will livestream the debate, as they did with the Republicans last month, or whether they'll shunt it over to cable-only like Fox did with their debate. Mashable is the only site reporting that CNN will be livestreaming like last time; and I'm guessing that's accurate since the GOP debate was their highest rated show ever. And also because oh my GOD this debate is going to be nuts and the whole world really needs to be able to see it unfold in real time.
The most insane detail is that even though CNN has no information about whether it will stream live video of the debate, the station is boasting loudly that viewers will be able to watch it in virtual reality.
Yes. That's right. CNN is broadcasting a VR stream of an event where old people stand at podiums and talk. The event is happening at the Wynn in Las Vegas, and is literally the most visually boring show in the entire city. Precisely the kind of immersive experience that realizes the promise of the Holodeck.
There are five more Democratic debates after this. Can't wait to see Sarah McLachlan perform as a hologram at the next one.
The only requirements to watch the VR stream: a Samsung phone and a virtual reality helmet, both of which are owned by approximately equal portions of the population. Jason Farkas, a CNN producer, is quoted as saying "We're really pushing the envelope here." Yes, I suppose you are, in a junkmail sort of wayyou get the envelope in the mail and then toss it in the trash, muttering, "Why would anybody want this?"
Political debates are exclusively made by, watched by, and star a bunch of old people. Is this CNN's way of making debates relevant to a younger demographic? If that's their goal, they'd be better off hiring some hot pop star to show up at the debate instead.
Oh no wait. They also attempted that. But their hot pop star is Cheryl Crow. She'll be singing the national anthem and an "opening number," whatever the hell that means. Alas, she probably will not be allowed to stick around for a duet with Hillary.
You can also look forward to awkward foot-in-mouther Don Lemon fielding questions from Facebook, so that's sure to go smoothly.
Another fun wildcard: Joe Biden will maybe be at the debate. Or maybe not. He hasn't decided. And he has until the day before to make up his mind. A surprise appearance by Joe Biden would be quite the show-stealer, eating up lots of attention that had previously been devoted to Bernie and Hillary and those other guys.
Oh, right, the other guys. Martin O'Malley, Jim Webb, and Lincoln Chafee will also be warming podiums during the debate. They are all polling below one percent, so this will be an excellent opportunity for everyone around the country to say "Who is this? I bought an Oculus Rift to look at a bunch of old guys nobody's heard of? What happened to Cheryl Crow?"
I almost expect them to be pushing pedophilia, the “next civil rights movement.”
Just had a thought - wouldn’t it be interesting to have a “plant” candidate that challenged the main candidates on their hypocrisy by promoting “other” alternative lifestyles.
For the malcontent party, it boils down to who will promise the most free stuff.
“Do you believe the judicial system should follow Sharia law, or that a separate Sharia court system should be established anywhere in the United States?”
Question one: Mr. Sanders, if you are the nominee, would you consider joining the democrat party?
I have a very hard time listening to all the lies and BS every time any of them open their mouths. I’ll give it a shot but I think I’ll need to medicate myself to keep from bursting a blood vessel.
“Would you favor a sexual minorities EBT card to enable underprivileged LGBTQ people to be able to afford gender and sexual choices?”
They’re going to end up all looking like the second coming of Ronald Reagan.
Doesn’t Lincoln Chaffee realize he’s already brought an Everest sized mountain of embarrassment and shame upon himself? The guy’s probably even more stupid than Joe Biden and that’s an ocean full of stupid.
I don't care about virtual reality, I want to know what is the screen resolution of the broadcast. Seeing dinosaur democrats on a 55 inch 4k resolution screen isn't going to be pretty. They're going to have to vasoline up the lens like they were filming Joan Collins if they want to help Hillary.
Will the first question be
” Mrs Clinton why aren’t you in jail”?
I’d rather have a colonostopy than watch that debate. :-)
“Viewers can expect to lose at least 20 IQ points.”
I might end up with a negative figure.
Tbey won’t stop until they have normalized pedo-necro-bestiality.
That’s right: sex with dead puppies.
Because, well, “it’s time”.
I don’t think there will be the level of divisive questioning there has been in the Republican debates.
What could be the policy differences between the various Santa Claus government representatives.
I know Hillary wants to bribe votes with 300 billion in money we don’t have for education.
Maybe Hillary will repeat her famous line, “We Will Take Things From You”!
Yeah, “cutting edge” is all these loons care about. The “younger generation” demands it.
I never thought I’d say this, but I hate kids (millennials). They have turned out to be a wicked generation overall.
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