Where Ever You Be, Let Your Wind Go Free

The Melbourne Age -- Australia ^ | Sept. 7, 2001 | Farrah Tomazin

[Big Bunyip]

Fart for fart's sake, the judge declares

By FARRAH TOMAZIN
Friday 7 September 2001
Farting was an involuntary and "natural circumstance", a judge said yesterday in dismissing a conviction against a man who "let the flatulence escape" in a public place.

David Paul Grixti, 28, of Werribee, was fined $200 in the Werribee Magistrates Court earlier this year for offensive behavior after he bent over and passed wind in the presence of a police officer and another man. He appealed against the decision in the County Court yesterday.

Amid muffled laughter, Judge Leslie Ross was told how Mr Grixti walked towards the Werribee police station watchhouse counter on August 13 last year and, after being asked if he needed help, "poked the rear end of his body out" and broke wind.

Senior Constable Shane Andrew Binns alleged that Mr Grixti was looking directly at him as he did this, but said that when he called him over, "he just looked at me and walked out the door".

Senior Constable Binns, now stationed at Geelong, and a second witness told the court that they were "disgusted" by Mr Grixti's actions, and believed that the act - which, it was said, left a stench in the station - was intentional.

In dismissing the case as a waste of time, Judge Ross said there was no evidence to convince him beyond reasonable doubt that this was true.

He said passing wind was "quite often involuntary" and just because a person bent over to make the situation "a little more comfortable" it did not prove that it was deliberate.

"I don't believe ... you can turn that particular piece of human behavior on at will," he said.

[Big Bunyip]

Now that the kiddies have gone to bed, the really important news from Down Under

[Storm Orphan]

Pharoah! Let my people go!

[strela]

Senior Constable Binns, now stationed at Geelong, and a second witness told the court that they were "disgusted" by Mr Grixti's actions, and believed that the act - which, it was said, left a stench in the station - was intentional.

Whoever smelt it, dealt it. Case dismissed.

[JoeSixPack1]

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[KingNo155]

This case stinks

[Valin]

Beans beans, the musical fruit,
The more you eat,
the more you toot,
the more you toot,
the better you feel,
so let's have bean for every meal.

[Give Piece A Chance]

Whoever smelt it, dealt it. Case dismissed.

The argument on appeal: whoever denied it, supplied it.

[Charles Henrickson]

David Paul Grixti, 28, of Werribee, was fined $200. . . .

Should be 200 farthings, shouldn't it?

[Charles Henrickson]

"Do you swear to tell the toot, the whole toot, and nothing but the toot?"

[Charles Henrickson]

"If it doesn't **it, you must acquit."

[BluesDuke]

Farting was an involuntary and "natural circumstance"...

As much could be said of most legislation and speechifying which is emitted from Washington. (And you thought those clowns wanted to stop global warming!)

[BluesDuke]

You may have caused a number of people who still enjoy the record to think differently of Rockin' Sidney's legendary zydeco hit, "My Toot Toot"...

[Libertina]

BUMP Oh stop... LOLROTFL very clever tonight CH. Wish I'd thought of one of them. Thanks