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What if? ... President Gore Calls for Healing, Reflection
my corroded mind
Posted on 09/24/2001 7:42:29 PM PDT by IM4TRUTH
President Gore Calls for Healing, Reflection After Massive, Multiple Aviation Mishaps 9-21-01 WASHINGTON -- In a speech that some pundits said may be among the greatest presidential speeches of all time, President Al Gore called for healing and reflection in the wake of the freedom fighter pleadings for help in New York and Washington last week. Speaking before a joint session of Congress, Gore received more than three standing ovations during his speech, which some scholars said was even better than his "One World, One Family" speech last month in Beijing. Given the complexity of the topic, the speech was the longest in the history of presidential speeches before Congress, which one academic said made it even better. "What it lacked in enthusiasm and flow, it made up for with compassion," said Professor Steven Jordan of Brown University's College of Social Conscience. "It was simply a great speech and I think it signals the beginning of the healing process for all of us." Gore, in his ninth major address since winning the heavily contested presidential election over Republican George W. Bush last year, declared "war" on the basic human emotions that force some to engage in destructive behavior. "Make no mistake about it. We will get to the root of this problem," Gore said in the 268-minute speech. "I call for war -- a war against hate." Even before this historic speech, administration officials had quietly said that Gore had ruled out any military action because of the inevitable damage to the environment. FBI officials still haven't fingered any particular group with the massive aviation mishaps that occurred Sept. 11. FBI Director Greta Van Sustern said the department "doesn't want to jump to any harsh conclusions." "I think the important thing for us to remember here is that for us to prevent these things in the future, we must find out why they're happening in the first place," Van Sustern said. "At some point we have to ask ourselves 'what have we done to make these people so angry?' " The tragic events of Sept. 11 will go down in history as a "wake-up call" for America the Western World, who must "be sensitive to the pain these people feel inside," Gore said to a standing ovation, even from those members of the media in the control booth down the hall. Instead of guns and bombs, Gore called for a transcontinental "chain of love" that would stretch from one end of the globe to another, with people of all colors and religions joining hands in a sign of global unity. Even Hollywood was getting into the act, with celebrities like Ben Affleck, Warren Beatty and Alec Baldwin leading efforts to stage a benefit for the families of the dead freedom fighters. Secretary of Poverty Rosie O'Donnell said "this is a time to reflect on why good people do bad things. I mean just this morning my youngest child Stephan made his sister cry by calling her a 'big, fat Newt Gingrich' because she wouldn't share the Smuckers." During the historic speech, Gore announced the creation of an all new cabinet-level position to combat global hate. New "Hate Czar" Barbra Streisand said she is ready to hit the ground running. "Hate and violence are very serious things and I plan to use my new powers to find it where it lives," Streisand said. "But first we have get rid of the guns that cause violence in the first place." While FBI Director Van Sustern said there was no evidence that firearms were involved in the hijackings and subsequent aviation accidents, she said there were NRA members and anti-choice activists on each flight that may have contributed to the freedom fighters' anger. Jordan, the Brown University professor, said Gore's speech could go down in history alongside Franklin D. Roosevelt's "Day of Infamy" speech and John F. Kennedy's "ask not what your country" speech. But he was disturbed by the Republican reaction. "There were several of them acting like they were sleeping through the whole thing. I think that's the height of disrespect," Jordan said. Gore spokesman Katie Couric said she would not respond to questions about the Republicans' actions, but House Speaker Denny Hastert defended their behavior. -30-
TOPICS: Miscellaneous; Political Humor/Cartoons
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Someone asked what it would be like if Algore had won instead of Dubya, so I took the idea and ran with it.
posted on 09/24/2001 7:42:29 PM PDT
Bizarro World... (probably misspelled)
posted on 09/24/2001 7:47:33 PM PDT
Priceless. You should submit it to the Onion.
posted on 09/24/2001 7:50:06 PM PDT
Gosh, you had me going there for a minute.
posted on 09/24/2001 7:51:38 PM PDT
I was really scared for a moment there....
posted on 09/24/2001 7:52:44 PM PDT
funny stuff, probably not too far from the ultimate reality. First Gore would have come out blazing, send a couple of dozen cruise missles at some tents in Afganistan, and hit a camel in the ass. Then he would open the doors and let the "can't we all get along and just love" fruitcakes take over....
posted on 09/24/2001 7:55:18 PM PDT
My daughter commented today that if Gore had been President his only concern on the explosion would have been the asbestos in the air...this would have been an enviornmental crisis not an international one!
posted on 09/24/2001 7:56:50 PM PDT
Magnifico! Bravo, etc.
posted on 09/24/2001 7:56:51 PM PDT
To: Congressman Billybob
Thanks for the compliments, Congressman. And I remember IowaHawk. Fondly. And the scary thing through all this is how doggone close we came to the above nightmare becoming a reality.
posted on 09/24/2001 7:57:57 PM PDT
I cannot even re-read this. It is too close to what might have happened! ~~~shudder~~~
"Ladies and gentlemen, the thtate of our union is thtrong."
I am going to another thread and look at some pictures of President (thank You, God) Bush!!
Reading that scared the hell out of me. Way to realistic. I thank God for the freepers that drove Gore nuts and helped prevent this story from coming true.
posted on 09/24/2001 7:58:34 PM PDT
Quit your day job!!!!!!
FBI Director Greta Van Sustern
posted on 09/24/2001 8:01:04 PM PDT
by Jean S
Gore would have already changed the ATF to HIIP -"Homeland Islam Indoctrination Police".
"Its time for America to become get HIIP with the rest of the world" - Al Gore September 12, 2001
posted on 09/24/2001 8:03:40 PM PDT
Pretty sickening. Contrast that with Ashcroft's daring escalation in the War Against American Citizens.
In either case the terrorists walk, and the citizens get the shaft and chains.
posted on 09/24/2001 8:05:44 PM PDT
Hope to see copies of this in my inbox next week!
Outstanding and on point! I would add:
Gore, while decrying the substantial carbon dioxide added to the atmosphere due to the combusted carbon materials, looked forward to an increase in "green" space in southern Manhattan and the lower population density.
posted on 09/24/2001 8:08:56 PM PDT
"massive aviation mishaps"
The whole thing is hilarious, in part because it's so close to what might have been... Thanks for the laugh.
Brrrrrrr! Chillingly plausible. I misread the headline and thought it was a real statement by former vice president Gore. Too real! Including the media response.
Move over Dave Barry!!!!!! That was GOOD!! I've already forwarded it, so consider it public domain dude! Man I'd love to write something that fine.
Lmfao ! That's on the mark !
This post belies your name, Im4truth, but had Gore won your excellent and entertaining farce would probably be a very scary truth.
If you don't write for a living you have missed your calling.
If Gore had been President, he would be higher than a kite right now...too much pressure. He cannot even take the rigors of daily life without a toke or two...much less conducting a war. And Tipper....well, I guess we wouldn't see her much, as she would be committed....Katie Couric...ROTFLMAO!!!!
Gore would have blasted away in Afghanistan. Like Clinton, he was more than willing to intervene in the Gulf War, Kosovo, Haiti, Somalia, etc. In fact, I would be bet than Gore would have intervened more extensively than Bush plans to and would have be more aggressive in suspending civil liberties including the second amendment. The theory that Gore is a peacenik simply does not correspond to reality. He is a hawk (albeit for the NWO) and always havs been. It is hard to imagine given the comments here that so many freepers were peaceniks only a couple of years ago on Kosovo!
The main story of the whole disaster would not be the heros, but Prez Gore's race to NYC to beat Bubba to the cameras. Of course they would both lose to Hill.
Comment #32 Removed by Moderator
Tremendous! It's so on the mark of all we know of the "Tree" that it is scary! I thank God each and every day for giving us President Dubya and not algore.
Did anyone catch Lawrence O'Donnell on Hardball this past week, where he stated that (and I'm paraphrasing) people he knew told him they had voted for algore but NOW are saying they are happy that W was elected instead of Gore. Sounded like O'Donnell's friends don't have any confidence in the "Tree."
If Gore had been elected, FReepers sure as hell wouldn't be closing ranks around his "Department of Homeland Security" - they'd be screaming themselves hoarse.
I'm beginning to think that to keep a Free Republic, I should have voted for Gore. Not for what he would have done, but for the fact that he would have faced substantial organized resistance that Bush won't.
Geraldo said good things about President Bush tonight including: "I'm proud he's my President and I'm glad that he's my President." (!!!)
nothing about sec of state B Frank.
posted on 09/24/2001 8:27:40 PM PDT
From this point on, I'm voting for whoever is hated the most. Hillary in 2004. I don't want her to accomplish anything; I want the millions who despise her to throw themselves into the gears of her police state so nobody in government gets anything done.
posted on 09/24/2001 8:29:53 PM PDT
HEY!! You forgot to mention about Karissa (sp?) and Chelsea heading up sit-downs with Saddam and Arafat in town-hall meetings on CNN worldwide to help ignorant Americans understand how we've hurt them and their lives.
I think I read this on Freerepublic: "If Gore or Clinton had been President the attack never would have happened because Osama would have never attacked an ally!"
Good grief! Greta,Rosie & Katie. Scary but funny.
Geraldo licked his finger, held it up and was knocked over by a hurricane. With polls at 90 percent approval, it is a bad career move by any media hack to publicly disparage this President. Read nothing into the insincere remarks of a craven opportunist.
posted on 09/24/2001 8:34:40 PM PDT
Every Gore voter I know has said they are happy Bush is in the White House and not gore
Although most of these people are soccer moms and what really got to them were Bush's tears. GACK. (Not at Bush, but at the way these people think!!!)
posted on 09/24/2001 8:49:54 PM PDT
Why can't I get this picture of Elmer Fudd out of my brain?
SSShhhhhh!! Be vewy, vewy qwiet....I'm hunting Muswims...huhuhuhuhuhuhuh!
greta van sustern? where do they find all these lespians? (yes, i said lespians)
don't be surprised if 'babs boxershorts' does a 'streisand' on us!
what it would be like if Algore had won instead of Dubya
I'm sure I'm gonna have nightmares just thinking about the possibility... We came so close, too close.
posted on 09/24/2001 9:20:56 PM PDT
bet that ain't ALL he licked. his nose is VERY brown!
This is great, and most likely close to what could have been. Love the Greta line!
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