Skip to comments.F.D.N.Y. -- Funeral Schedule (10/20--11/11)
Posted on 10/19/2001 9:25:19 AM PDT by Askel5
| Every day the Daily News publishes a list of memorials.
Try to get to one.
They died trying to get to us.Lenora Skenazy
| Firefighters from around the nation
salute a fallen hero, Capt. Joseph Farrelly.
With nearly a dozen funeral/memorial services scheduled for the next two Saturdays and one or several scheduled nearly every day through November 11, 2001, it is hoped that FReepers will find the time to show their respect and gratitude by attending a service or two.
Given that some of these services are being held nearly two months -- to the day, even -- past September 11, I think chances are good the families of these men will not have quite the turnout others did in the wake of the WTC tragedy.
In case you are at all apprehensive about attending, I offer below some observations and thoughts by my sister who -- looking to "do something" and turned away by many volunteer agencies already inundated with help -- decided to begin paying her respects in person when and where she could.
Even after attending several services, she'd been concerned she might not be allowed into the funeral for Donald Burns at St. Patrick's Cathedral. So, standing outside, she and others waited as the last of family and firemen filed in the front door and then moved to slip quietly in the side door.
Suddenly a cop came flying out of nowhere. Afraid they were going to be turned away, she was relieved to find he only wanted to open the side door for them. Finding it locked, he jumped on his radio and ordering someone inside to "Get over here and open the doors and let the people in."
(After some confusion and repeated replies that "the side doors are open," New York's finest rolled his eyes in disgust and barked into his radio: "Hey ... how 'bout you just open the door I'm knocking on" and tapped until the locks were turned.)
New Yorkers not only are welcome, they are ENCOURAGED to please attend. As you will see from my sister's last report, these brave men and women end up selfless and serving OTHERS to the very end.
Some impressions I asked her to write down for me after laughing and crying as I listened to her tell me about the funerals for Brian Lake, Billy McDonnell and a most extraordinary man: Donald Burns.
| I started attending the funerals for cops and firefighters lost on September 11th as a simple show of respect. I thought of it as something I could do for them. The first few services, when I stood outside, unable to enter the crowded church, left me solemn and reflective. That changed last week.
I've shared in a few Masses, heard the words of loved ones and colleagues, watched the reactions of other strangers present and the effect has been nothing short of miraculous. I know the city has a long way to go towards healing. I know we probably never will heal completely. I know every time I pass Ground Zero, or a firehouse or police station draped in black and purple, or the tattered "MISSING" flyers still posted around town, I am reminded of what evil men can do - - what unbearable suffering they can inflict.
But every service I attend tells me there are better men. Those who so love life they take the most active role they can in living their own life and protecting those of others. I speak not only of those being laid to rest but of the thousands who come to salute them.
You cannot watch these men and women honor their own and not be moved -- and humbled. I know I can no longer look at them without thinking of what they would do and have done for any of us at a moment's notice. I have left each service increasingly confident that mankind is capable of the greatest of goods, the deepest understanding and the highest dignity.
I realize now that even in death, these people are still helping us -- allowing us to put names and faces on our collective grief and inspiring us with the lives they led.
Donald J. Burns, Assistant Chief of Department and City-wide Tour Commander was remembered last week in a beautiful service at St. Patrick's as a man with a life-long love of the New York Fire Department.
Saturday's service for Billy Lake, of Rescue 2, also celebrated a man with a lifelong love of the job. Lake's uncle remembered that Billy and his friends were always hanging around their local firehouse as kids and the firemen there didn't mind. What they did mind, he added, were the number of times these kids would beat them to the scene of the fire.
That's what Brian McDonnell said to his wife, Maggie, just weeks before he was lost at the World Trade Center. Maggie McDonnell spoke with such grace, love and courage at her husband Brian's memorial last week that the moment she finished, the entire congregation rose as one and applauded her.
I cannot thank our city officials enough for inviting us to attend these memorials and funerals.
It has been and continues to be a moving and healing experience. Even more incredible is the obvious ripple effect this hour of grief has had upon our city. There are a thousand tiny miracles of compassion taking place here every day:
On a more personal note, I found out Saturday that Billy Lake and other members of Rescue 2 had received commendations for their work in Oklahoma City. Having grown up in Oklahoma, I was glad to be there to honor them.
I regret not having acted on my initial impulse from years ago -- to find these teams who went to Oklahoma, to meet them, shake their hands and thank them in person. I don't think any of us will ever let such an opportunity pass again.
We've still nearly a month to go before these men and women are laid to rest.
Don't leave those buried last feeling forgotten. Please.
You know she does have that 'cheap 3rd world whore' look about her.....
(Please don't be mad at my having a joke at your expense in an effort to galvanize attendance ... =) ... not all of us can pick up and go -- as have firefighters from across the nation, from what my sister says. Still, we all probably know some folks in the area who might have the opportunity to attend in our stead. Best regards. Won't happen again.)
Me too. I've appreciated very much her sharing these impressions and explaining the profound effect they've had on her.
She's viewing her home of the last ten years through a whole new prism.
We won't forget.
Yes, this is so true in so many ways. I'm sure most, if not all, of us regret having let opportunities pass that we couldn't get back, again.