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Who here has served on jury duty and has a good excuse to get off?
me ^ | Feb. 6, 2002 | me

Posted on 02/06/2002 5:48:13 PM PST by Nachum

The county of Los Angeles refused to accept the excuses I put down. As in the days of the military draft, I have been called into service. Worse yet, the judge won't let me off after I explained my financial duress in a possible two week criminal trial. Now we come to JURY SELECTOION. I have to think of a good line to tell the prosecuting and defense attorney to convice them that I would be a poor choice to sit on their jury.

So- I am asking my fellow FReepers if they have had similar experience and can give guidance, a good retort, or tactic. I am counting on you!


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To: Nachum
No problem, just tell them that the justice system is totally rigged, that lawyers are evil incarnate, and that as far as you are concerned everyone involved with the justice system is either a liar, a sociopath, or hopelessly naive. Be sure to explain that the reason Lady Justice has scales is so she can weigh how much gold each side is willing to spend on the case, and whoever spends the most wins. That should do it!
21 posted on 02/06/2002 5:54:59 PM PST by Billy_bob_bob
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To: JeanS
Totally agree.
22 posted on 02/06/2002 5:55:27 PM PST by JoeSixPack1
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To: Nachum
One good line: "They wouldn't be here if they weren't guilty of something"

Another good line: "I hate cops. They all lie".

If you use both lines, I don't think either side will want you on the jury.
23 posted on 02/06/2002 5:55:41 PM PST by Poser
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To: Nachum
If you are a reasonable person you should play your part. We have far too many messed up jurors.
24 posted on 02/06/2002 5:55:54 PM PST by shempy
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To: Nachum
Mention your three prior felonies. That ought to do the trick.
25 posted on 02/06/2002 5:55:55 PM PST by Grim
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To: JeanS
Is two weeks of your life to much to ask?

That depends. If you have small children who will have to go into some sort of day care to allow you to do that, do you think that is too much to ask? I sure do.

26 posted on 02/06/2002 5:55:57 PM PST by riley1992
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To: Nachum
Print this thread and show the judge or any of the attorneys and you'll be off........ No problem....
27 posted on 02/06/2002 5:55:58 PM PST by deport
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To: Nachum
"OJ WAS INNOCENT!!!"
28 posted on 02/06/2002 5:56:44 PM PST by kezekiel
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To: Nachum
It's very simple. Bring in some literature from the Fully Informed Jury Association (I'm sure they have stuff you can download) and make certain the lawyers and/or judge are aware that you have it. Let them see it, or if necessary ask them about it. I guarantee you, you'll have zero chance of being allowed on a jury.
29 posted on 02/06/2002 5:57:32 PM PST by dpwiener
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To: Nachum
Just say,
"Mr. T says 'I pity the fool who picks me for yo jury'."
30 posted on 02/06/2002 5:57:50 PM PST by Rightwing Canuck
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To: Darth Falar
Goodie Two Shoes Alert!

U.S. Constitution
Bill of Rights
Amendment VI

In all criminal prosecutions, the accused shall enjoy the right to a speedy and public trial, by an impartial jury of the state and district wherein the crime shall have been committed, which district shall have been previously ascertained by law, and to be informed of the nature and cause of the accusation; to be confronted with the witnesses against him; to have compulsory process for obtaining witnesses in his favor, and to have the assistance of counsel for his defense.

31 posted on 02/06/2002 5:58:36 PM PST by Jean S
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To: Darth Falar
"I'm not sure I can trust the legal system since it's the same system that lets the Mossad crash planes into the WTC and Blacks run loose."

I Think the Mossad is in your Underwear........
32 posted on 02/06/2002 5:58:50 PM PST by cmsgop
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To: Billy_bob_bob
I know a criminal defense lawyer in Brooklyn who told me almost the exact same thing.
33 posted on 02/06/2002 5:59:09 PM PST by diefree
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To: Nachum
Financial considerations aside, this could be an opportunity to keep one of your fellow citizens from being run over by a government steamroller.
34 posted on 02/06/2002 5:59:25 PM PST by pa_dweller
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To: Nachum
Actually, you should serve. The Justice system needs more freepers to serve in order to compensate for "OJ jurors" and other misfits.

I have served several times and have enjoyed the experience. Unfortunately, I doubt if I will ever serve again, I have been screwed by too many attornies, hate them all without exception, and tell everyone freely that all attornies are worse than scum.

Do you know why an attorney is like a sperm?







Because they both have less that a one in a million chance of becoming human.

35 posted on 02/06/2002 5:59:49 PM PST by DeSoto
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To: Nachum
A Tee Shirt that says "Kill'em all and let G*d sort'em out"

or

just bring a Bible to read during the down time. ;)

36 posted on 02/06/2002 5:59:52 PM PST by CathyRyan
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To: Nachum
I had surgery for diverticulits in December; but I get back in the jury pool in April so I may have to use some of these suggestions later...
37 posted on 02/06/2002 5:59:57 PM PST by Keith in Iowa
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To: Nachum
I'm pushing 40, and I've never even been called to serve on a jury. I think it would be interesting.
38 posted on 02/06/2002 5:59:59 PM PST by UnsinkableMollyBrown
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To: Nachum
I served on two juries, and initially was proud to do so. However, after seeing how our judicial system functions (notice I didn't say "works") I was totally disgusted.

The third time I was called to serve, the facts in the case were so obvious that the defendant was guilty (it was a DUI), that I looked around the courtroom and thought of the tremendous waste that was occurring here. Waste of taxpayer dollars, waste of human resources sitting in a courtroom hour after hour, not even knowing whether they would be selected to serve, or summarily dismissed.

At that time I was engaged in a major project at work, so I asked the bailiff if I might talk to the judge in order to be dismissed. He informed me that ,No, I would not be allowed to address Her Majesty, but I could write her a note with the reason for requesting to be excused.

I proceeded to pen a screed deploring the waste of taxpayer dollars on a farce of a trial where a defendant was so obviously guilty, with her taxpayer-provided public defender was trying to convince us great unwashed potential jurors of her innocence.

The bailiff took my note, brought it to Her Greatness the Judge. He emerged from her private chambers a few minutes later and informed me that Her Eminence had issued a directive for me to sit down and shut up - that I would no doubt be excused during the voir dire.

Lo and behold, I was never even called for voir dire, but the upshot is that I have not received a jury duty notice since - and this was 10 years ago. I honestly believe that I insulted Her Grand Poohbahness by daring to question the legal system and she had my name stricken from the pool of potential jurors. Oh well...

39 posted on 02/06/2002 6:00:11 PM PST by Inspectorette
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To: Nachum
I wanted to serve. I'm a salesman whose ability to earn is adversly impacted by sitting at home waiting to be called. I explained my situation to the Bailiff and was granted a waiver.

In retrospect, given how awful the economy was then, I should have just served and kept my mouth shut.

40 posted on 02/06/2002 6:00:20 PM PST by knowtherules
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