Nigerian Scam Artist Wants To Buy Brooklyn Bridge From Me!!! BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!

E-Mail | February 24, 2002 | PJ-Comix

[PJ-Comix]

Don't think this just happens on the Web. A few years ago I got into a conversation with an Australian tourist who proposed a similar scam where he would deposit his money into my bank account. At the time I politely declined his offer but now I wish I accepted and had some cops to meet him at the bank. Why? Because he probably tried to pull the same scam on others. This scam is VERY COMMON down here in South Florida.

[Rebelbase]

Go for it. Maybe Hooters could be a sponsor.

[PJ-Comix]

See my reply #34.

[PJ-Comix]

Go for it. Maybe Hooters could be a sponsor.

Hooters are already heroes to me. Why? Remember how a few years ago the government told them they were discriminatory because they didn't hire male waiters at their restaurants? Instead of cowering and complying with such a ridiculous demand, Hooters countered with billboards showing some guy dressed in a Hooters waitress uniform. The government backed down on their demands since Hooters turned them into a laughingstock.

[hchutch]

Way to go, P.J.!!

Keep hammering `em!

Who knows, maybe you can scam some gold from `em. What's the record, anyhow?

[PJ-Comix]

Actually I was thinking of "paying" this Nigerian Scam artist for various services and then have him invest all of his payments into Brooklyn Bridge Transit Bonds. If I could work with a TV station we could actually print up official looking Brooklyn Bridge Transit Bonds. I would also love to take Mr. Uche on a trip to cross the Brooklyn Bridge so he could see first hand his investment. Of course, I would get both of us to DUCK-WALK across the Brooklyn Bridge. (All recorded on camera.)

[SeeRushToldU_So]

That is funny; please keep us posted on your "investments".

[Blood of Tyrants]

BWAHAHAHAHA! You really need to get some official looking "bonds" and fax this goofball one! Maybe you can scam the scammer!

[Focault's Pendulum]

List the Transit Bonds on E Bay, then e mail him, saying you're gonna give him bidding preference....under the table, so to speak...see if he bites.

[hchutch]

In this case, I think Ashcroft and Olson will file this under the "too embarassing to prosecute" heading. I mean, prosecute an intended victim for scamming the would-be scam artist? Yeah, I can see how that will play in the media. It wouldn't be that flattering. Not to mention the high probability that these folks would walk on whatever charges were filed. Besides, these scam artists know the risks.

[PJ-Comix]

List the Transit Bonds on E Bay, then e mail him, saying you're gonna give him bidding preference....under the table

Good idea but it would get me in trouble with e-Bay. Hey, I've got a PERFECT 524 Feedback over there (no negatives) and I don't want to ruin it. However, I occasionally notice things being sold on e-Bay from Nigeria. Are folks actually stupid enough to send payments over there?

[Focault's Pendulum]

BTW...I want to play Marco...I got a fake, long thin mustache and do a great street Brazilian accent.
"Theees Breedge breeng mucho dinero...and ju get free EZ Pass for only 12 dollaz more...muy bien?

Thanks...and I hope I passed the audition.

[dennisw]

Real story. I know someone who was scammed out of $26,000 by an American on some Pacific island. Might have been Samoa. The Pacific Island guy told big stories how he was helping the natives with colloidal silver. He was brewing it in 5 gallon plastic buckets. But that he needed money to buy and fix up a boat so he could minister to the sick people on all the islands who were clamoring for the product. He said the colloidal silver enterprise would be a success and the money would be paid back

The $26,000 was sent and the sucker stopped hearing form the islander. Finally he went to investigate and he found the scumbag was a drunk and had squandered the money. Some work was done on the boat project but the money was literally passed away. The man who got scammed was a great human being who really wanted to help the sick people....... Unfortunately he was also prime scam material.

[hchutch]

Guess so.

LOL!

Rip `em off for all you can!

[PJ-Comix]

In this case, I think Ashcroft and Olson will file this under the "too embarassing to prosecute" heading.

I think such a TV show would be a PUBLIC SERVICE since it would serve as a warning not to give out information about your bank account. Down here in Florida scam artists are even posing as cops to gain access to bank accounts. Not long ago a couple of scam artists pretended to be police detectives and told an elderly man that they were investigating a bank scam artist and they needed his bank account info to nail the scam artist. Fortunately the intended mark was sufficiently suspicious to contact the REAL police and the scam artists pretending to be cops were busted when they showed up at his bank.

Remember, all these bank account scam e-mails are being sent because they WORK! If more publicity were given to this scam, it couldn't be pulled off so often.

[PJ-Comix]

BTW...I want to play Marco...I got a fake, long thin mustache and do a great street Brazilian accent.

OK, but can't you grow a real moustache? If you are hired you will be paid off with a free drug sniffing dog of your very own.

[hchutch]

Perhaps, but I can see someone taking one of these folks for a few million if they play their cards right. Poohbah had an absolutely EVIL idea in the earlier thread...

[Focault's Pendulum]

OK, but can't you grow a real moustache? If you are hired you will be paid off with a free drug sniffing dog of your very own.

Ok I'm busy growing one. But let's make me blind (I got some cool sun glasses) and use the dog as a seeing eye companion.....then tell him I'm a former employee of both the DEA and the INS.

I can see him salivating now when we later try to sell him his own border crossing franchise.

[PJ-Comix]

If you ever go to the Margate Flea Market you will meet a vendor there who used to be very wealthy....for a very short time until he got scammed out of his fortune. His name is Larry and his parents owned a chain of hardware stores in the NY area. After they passed away, Larry inherited the hardware stores which he promptly sold. Newly rich, Larry promptly ditched his wife and went on a cruise with his girlfriend. While on the cruise, Larry met a Canadian "stockbroker" at the gambling tables who immediately noted Larry as an easy mark which he was. The Canadian "stockbroker" soon sold Larry a fortune in penny stocks in Canadian goldmines which quickly became worthless. The broke Larry was forced to become a vendor at the Margate flea market.

This is where my friend Ken comes into the picture. One day Ken was walking down the aisles when he heard a voice. Ken stopped and listened again. He heard the voice: "Kill me!" Ken still couldn't find out who was saying this until he noticed a vendor on the ground with his head next to the front wheel of the car. It was Larry.

"Kill me!" Larry repeated. "I can't take it anymore." I guess it all hit Larry at once that he was once rich and quickly got scammed out of his fortune.

Then Larry reached into his pocket and held the keys up to Ken. "Please drive this car over my head. It would be merciful. I'll even give you the title to my car so you can keep it after you run over me. Just, please, end it for me."

Of course, my friend Ken couldn't go through with it so he asked Larry to have some breakfast with him and talk about why he wanted to leave this life. So Larry had breakfast with Ken and told him the story above. I later met Larry through Ken since Larry was interested having me teach him how to sell stuff on eBay. What a mental case! When I entered Larry's home it looked like the interior walls were decorated by Charles Manson with bizarre words drawn in black magic marker. (Also the grass on his lawn was about two feet high). I need to write a whole story about my encounters with Larry because what you have read here is just the beginning. All I'll say for now is that while I was showing Larry how do sell on eBay, he served me up a dinner that was so horrible that I couldn't even be polite about it. I just tossed his plate against the wall. (And since his wall was already covered with strange markings it wasn't as impolite as it sounds.)

p.s. If you want to spot Larry at Margate Flea Market just look for a guy who looks and sounds like an adenoidal tortoise. Trust me. That description fits him PERFECTLY.

[John O]

add me to the ping list too please. This is hilarious!