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Morocco offers US monkeys to detonate land mines
United Press International via COMTEX ^ | 3-24-03

Posted on 03/24/2003 4:04:37 AM PST by Oldeconomybuyer

RABAT, D.C., Morocco, Mar 24, 2003 (United Press International via COMTEX) -- A Moroccan publication accused the government Monday of providing unusual assistance to U.S. troops fighting in Iraq by offering them 2,000 monkeys trained in detonating land mines.

The weekly al-Usbu' al-Siyassi reported that Morocco offered the U.S. forces a large number of monkeys, some from Morocco's Atlas Mountains and others imported, to use them for detonating land mines planted by the Iraqis.

The publication quoted a highly-informed source as saying, "that is not a scientific illusion but a well-known military tactic."


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Foreign Affairs; Government; News/Current Events; Politics/Elections; War on Terror
KEYWORDS: animalrights; iraq; iraqifreedom; mincedmonkeys; war
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If the Moroccan Monkeys don't work, maybe Michael Moore will volunteer ..

1 posted on 03/24/2003 4:04:37 AM PST by Oldeconomybuyer
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Man, and I haven't had monkey meat since Angeles City, 1981 ... goes good with some San Miguel (actually, a LOT of San Miguel).
2 posted on 03/24/2003 4:09:04 AM PST by strela ("a' poppin' off at Pop's Sodium Shop")
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
This is going to thrill the PETA people, LOL!!!!
3 posted on 03/24/2003 4:14:40 AM PST by dawn53
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To: dawn53
This is going to thrill the PETA people, LOL!!!!

My thoughts exactly.

And another thing,,, can the Monkeys be trusted?

4 posted on 03/24/2003 4:34:03 AM PST by Iowa Granny
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Michael Moore IS a land mine.
5 posted on 03/24/2003 4:34:40 AM PST by NautiNurse (Usama bin Laden has produced more tapes than Steely Dan)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Mickey Dolan denies this.
6 posted on 03/24/2003 4:35:12 AM PST by DainBramage
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To: DainBramage
LOL! Great Post.

I bet Peter Tork will do it...

7 posted on 03/24/2003 4:41:04 AM PST by The_Sword_of_Groo (Taste the sword of Groo...One taste per customer)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Are these the cheese eating type? Are they provided with white surrender flags?
8 posted on 03/24/2003 4:42:35 AM PST by Gatún(CraigIsaMangoTreeLawyer)
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To: dawn53
This is going to thrill the PETA people

Let the PETA folks clear the mine fields.

9 posted on 03/24/2003 4:42:46 AM PST by Alouette
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
As God as my witness, I didn't know there were monkeys
in Morocco.

10 posted on 03/24/2003 4:47:09 AM PST by Trickyguy
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
If this monkey business doesn't work, we'll try gorilla warfare.
11 posted on 03/24/2003 4:47:17 AM PST by atomic conspiracy (Reformed liberal)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
in Iraq by offering them 2,000 monkeys trained in detonating land mines.

Won't their rollerskates bog down in the sand?
12 posted on 03/24/2003 4:51:12 AM PST by mr.pink
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To: Trickyguy
As God as my witness, I didn't know there were monkeys in Morocco.

See them now, they may become endangered. :)

13 posted on 03/24/2003 4:51:37 AM PST by Tijeras_Slim
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Oh Oh - here comes PETA!! Lookout
14 posted on 03/24/2003 4:53:45 AM PST by Mr. Wright
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Cant believe muslims would waste all those monkeys as long as they have children for the job
Like the Iranians did during the war with Iraq to protect their tanks
15 posted on 03/24/2003 5:44:23 AM PST by joesnuffy
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
maybe Michael Moore will volunteer

Save that big monkey for the heavy trigger anti-tank mines.

16 posted on 03/24/2003 5:49:12 AM PST by KarlInOhio (France: The whore for Babylon)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Geeze -- 2000 Monkeys? I thought that group had only four members. Did the studio gin up 500 duplicate bands or something? And aren't those guys kinda old by now? Besides, I am not even sure that any of them have taken a stand on this war, one way or another. I don't mind using Monkeys to clear mines if you can limit it to anti-war Monkeys.
17 posted on 03/24/2003 5:54:24 AM PST by No Truce With Kings (The opinions expressed are mine! Mine! MINE! All Mine!)
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To: mr.pink
They use pogo sitcks.
18 posted on 03/24/2003 5:57:51 AM PST by Eagle Eye (There ought to be a law against excessive legislation.)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Hey hey, we're the MonkBOOM!
19 posted on 03/24/2003 6:14:30 AM PST by Tex-Con-Man
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To: atomic conspiracy
If this monkey business doesn't work, we'll try gorilla warfare.

Somebody just had to say it.

20 posted on 03/24/2003 6:30:01 AM PST by techcor
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To: Iowa Granny
Are these Shiite or Sunni monkies? I think we need to find out. We don't want the monkies turning on us.
21 posted on 03/24/2003 7:58:11 AM PST by sharktrager
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
I'm skeptical. Assuming that they are leashed to prevent them from fleeing back to Africa, one explosion and the remaining monkeys would in one whimpering huddle for the next two weeks.
22 posted on 03/24/2003 8:04:53 AM PST by Ronaldus Magnus
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To: Oldeconomybuyer

23 posted on 03/24/2003 8:08:47 AM PST by jriemer (We are a Republic not a Democracy)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Things like this make me feel really sorry for the protocol officer. How in blazes do you politely decline mine-clearing monkeys?
24 posted on 03/24/2003 8:09:27 AM PST by discostu (I have not yet begun to drink)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Can we use dolphins too???
25 posted on 03/24/2003 8:10:01 AM PST by Porterville (Screw the grammar, full posting ahead.)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer

26 posted on 03/24/2003 8:11:48 AM PST by Porterville (Screw the grammar, full posting ahead.)
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To: Howlin; Ed_NYC; MonroeDNA; widgysoft; Springman; Timesink; dubyaismypresident; Grani; coug97; ...
"Hold muh beer 'n watch this!" PING....

If you want on or off this list, please let me know!

27 posted on 03/24/2003 6:54:21 PM PST by mhking
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Ballistic kitties work better: http://www.studmonkeyracing.com/v2/vids/vidpagecat.html
28 posted on 03/24/2003 6:59:10 PM PST by flying Elvis
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
btt
29 posted on 03/24/2003 7:04:05 PM PST by flying Elvis
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To: flying Elvis

"Let's clear some landmines!"

30 posted on 03/24/2003 7:05:22 PM PST by Dog Gone
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
2,000 monkeys trained in detonating land mines.

With years of experience?

31 posted on 03/24/2003 7:07:02 PM PST by RightWhale (Theorems link concepts: Proofs establish links)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Maybe we could get Iran to donate some "Children of the Keys" to clear out the land mines.
32 posted on 03/24/2003 7:07:12 PM PST by xm177e2 (Stalinists, Maoists, Ba'athists, Pacifists: Why are they always on the same side?)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
"If the Moroccan Monkeys don't work, maybe Michael Moore will volunteer ."

Maybe we can dupe some of those human sheilds into doing it-

"Alright, right over there would be a good place to stand if you want to protect Iraqi civilians..."
33 posted on 03/24/2003 7:10:24 PM PST by Sofa King (-I am Sofa King- tired of liberal BS!)
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To: discostu
Which is exactly why we need a protocol officer with guts. Or we're going to end up with maimed monkeys. Tails blown off, unable to rollerskate.
34 posted on 03/24/2003 7:10:48 PM PST by small voice in the wilderness
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
PETA is not going to like this. Monkey shields...
35 posted on 03/24/2003 7:11:04 PM PST by A CA Guy (God Bless America, God bless and keep safe our fighting men and women.)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Did this guy have anything to do with it?

Man Sentenced For Monkeys In Pants

36 posted on 03/24/2003 7:17:45 PM PST by pttttt
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Doesn't that paint a rather humorous image in my mind.
37 posted on 03/24/2003 7:31:22 PM PST by AdA$tra (All we are saying ....is give war a chance)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Who cares if he volunteers or not? I say we tie a rope to his ankle, put him on a human sized catapult, and launch him into the mine field. If he isn't blown up immediately, you can't win every time, drag him back and try again.
38 posted on 03/24/2003 7:42:10 PM PST by Blood of Tyrants (Even if the government took all your earnings, you wouldn’t be, in its eyes, a slave.)
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To: atomic conspiracy
Good one!
39 posted on 03/24/2003 7:43:52 PM PST by eddie willers
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To: atomic conspiracy
If this monkey business doesn't work, we'll try gorilla warfare.

*Applause*

40 posted on 03/25/2003 10:06:44 AM PST by MrJingles (Clones are people, two.)
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To: dawn53
This is going to thrill the PETA people, LOL!!!!

Boy, you said it. To think a monkey should be sacrificed to save the lives of a bunch of worthless humans?...this is not a PETA moment!

41 posted on 03/25/2003 10:13:32 AM PST by patriot_wes
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Howard Cosell bump
42 posted on 03/25/2003 10:30:39 AM PST by Diddle E. Squat
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To: dawn53; Poohbah; Grampa Dave
Don't laugh.

PETA and that ilk filed suit to block a Navy sonar system.
43 posted on 03/25/2003 10:37:21 AM PST by hchutch ("But tonight we get EVEN!" - Ice-T)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Darn! I thought the title meant that Morocco was offering war protestors from the US for land mine duty.
44 posted on 03/25/2003 10:41:07 AM PST by Ignatz (Scribe of the Unwritten Law)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer

45 posted on 03/25/2003 10:46:58 AM PST by CheneyChick (Lock & Load)
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To: hchutch
To keep from offending Peta, we should round up the anti Americans pretending to be peace niks with Michael Moore and most of Follywood.

Then we can send then to Iraq to be our mine removers.

No use wasting an innocent monkey!
46 posted on 03/25/2003 10:47:29 AM PST by Grampa Dave (Stamp out Freepathons! Stop being a Freep Loader! Become a monthly donor!)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer
Why does Morocco have our democrats?
47 posted on 03/25/2003 10:48:51 AM PST by Moby Grape
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To: Tex-Con-Man
Hey hey, we're the MonkBOOM
Oh geez, Diet Pepsi sprayed on the monitor and keyboard!
48 posted on 03/25/2003 10:49:36 AM PST by Clintons Are White Trash (Helen Thomas, Molly Ivins, Maureen Dowd - The Axis of Ugly)
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To: Oldeconomybuyer


"OK you FReepers, knock off the wisecracks,
We're actually highly trained specialists."

49 posted on 03/25/2003 10:57:10 AM PST by Willie Green (Go Pat Go!!!)
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To: KarlInOhio

50 posted on 03/25/2003 11:05:55 AM PST by Kaslin
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