Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

Skip to comments.

BAGHDAD BOB -- The Wild Whoppers of Iraq's Weird & Wacky Minister of Information
The Iconoclast ^ | April 7, 2003 | Lin Anderson

Posted on 04/07/2003 2:39:19 PM PDT by Apolitical

TODAY'S ICONOCLAST FEATURED COMMENTARY


BAGHDAD BOB AND THE DEATH OF PROPAGANDA
The Wild Whoppers of Iraq's Weird and Wacky Minister of Information



by Lin Anderson


"Who are you going to believe," goes the old joke. "Me, or your own eyes and ears?"

That could well provide a decent and fitting epitaph for Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, Iraq's Minister of Information, although we harbor hope that he lives many years beyond the war. We sort of admire his hard-headed stubbornness to admit defeat -- indeed, not to accept anything other than sweet, sweet victory, 24 hours a day. He's one of a kind, the sort of fellow you'd expect to find in a Monty Python sketch, or a Peter Sellers movie.

No question the Minister's finest hour came late Sunday here in the States, early Monday Baghdad time. At a hastily-called outdoor press conference in Baghdad, punctuated by the unmistakable sounds of gunfire and those darned inopportune glimpses of U.S. tanks, the man some have affectionately nicknamed "Baghdad Bob" stubbornly stood his ground, denying the very existence of all that rather deadly-serious reality surrounding him.

To use another apt movie analogy, al-Sahhaf was the Iraqi version of martinet Greg Marmalard in the frat party classic Animal House, frantically screaming "All is wellllllll!" while being trampled by a mob.

To U.S. claims that Coalition forces had taken the ministry itself, the minister adamantly declared, "Absolutely that's not true. I can tell you that because I am here at the Ministry of Information."

Well, yes, but apparently outside in the parking lot. The very smoky parking lot.

The minister continued spinning his fanciful tale of Iraqi triumph in the literal face of abject failure, compiling a group of cockeyed statements which merit forever a hallowed place in the Museum of Propaganda.

"They said they have entered Baghdad in 65 tanks, into the centre of the city, and I am telling you this is not true," al-Sahhaf said, as U.S. tanks sat just a few hundred yards away.

"This is part of their sick game. We have slaughtered three-quarters of them so far," al-Sahhaf also claimed. "There is no presence of the American columns in Baghdad at all. Their columns are slaughtered and they have been fed a sour taste, a poison, by the brave forces of Saddam Hussein!"

At this point, it is well to remember, statues of Saddam Hussein were being blown up by gleeful Baghdad-based U.S. troops, some of whom also were hilariously unfurling their college flag on the lawn of the presidential palace.

But al-Sahhaf's greatest moment was yet to come, as he described the terror being wrought on coalition forces, a terror so, er, terrible that U.S. soldiers were ending their own lives in droves, rather than submit to it:

"They are beginning to commit suicide at the walls of Baghdad!" the minister declared. "And I encourage them to increase the rate of suicide. Their columns are being killed in the hundreds at the walls of Baghdad! We have fed them hell and death!

"Washington and London have thrown their soldiers into the fire," he continued. They are war criminals. They will bury their soldiers in hell, sent there by the hands of the Iraqis!"

As head-shakingly funny as this press conference was, it also served to point out in the most absurdly-convincing way possible the complete folly of old-fashioned propaganda itself, in a world where information zings at the speed of light.

(Excerpt) Read more at iconoclast.ca ...


TOPICS: Culture/Society; Editorial; Extended News; Foreign Affairs; News/Current Events; Political Humor/Cartoons
KEYWORDS: dreaming; internet; propaganda; saddam
Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-5051-66 next last
Another entertaining and insightful essay from Iconoclast's inimitable Lin Anderson. Check out the site for more pro-American gems from the Iconoclast dynamic duo of William Grim and Lin Anderson.
1 posted on 04/07/2003 2:39:20 PM PDT by Apolitical
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | View Replies]

To: Apolitical

Baghdad Bob says
"U.S. Forces are not in Baghdad...er...wait a minute."

2 posted on 04/07/2003 2:42:21 PM PDT by Justice
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical

3 posted on 04/07/2003 2:43:07 PM PDT by Grampa Dave (If you like a Strong Free Republic, become monthly donor!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
"What Tanks?" Bagdad Bob
4 posted on 04/07/2003 2:44:23 PM PDT by Imagine
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Imagine
Okay after we off Soddomite's French Brie collector, we go due north for two blocks to liberate some fresh baked French Bread after we kill Soddomite's baker. Nothing like a great 1983 French Red, Brie and Bread for a picnic on the Tigris! Someone tell the FNC reporter, to meet us at Baghdad Bob's front yard for the picnic.


5 posted on 04/07/2003 2:46:05 PM PDT by Grampa Dave (If you like a Strong Free Republic, become monthly donor!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 4 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
"And we have told the Coalition, leave Iraq now. They have left and are sending brave Iraqi Republican Guard troops 3 day passes to Disney World all expense paid. The fear of our brave soldiers sent the Caolition running screaming we are sorry." Baghdad Bob.
6 posted on 04/07/2003 2:49:39 PM PDT by Conspiracy Guy (Caring Rational Alert Professional)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
My favorite Baghdad Bob line: We have cut off their rotten heads.
7 posted on 04/07/2003 2:55:05 PM PDT by Black Bart
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
Yakkety Yak, Bomb Iraq
8 posted on 04/07/2003 2:58:40 PM PDT by South40
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Black Bart
my favorite is:

"The Americans, they always depend on a method what I call ... stupid, silly"

Makes me think of an absurd title for the war, like:

Operation Stupid Silly
9 posted on 04/07/2003 2:59:23 PM PDT by jrawk
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 7 | View Replies]

To: Grampa Dave
How different, really, is Bagdad Bob from Dan Rather, Peter Jennings, etc?

Hell, take away the beret & put him in a Brooks Brothers Suit, and the guy looks like your typical liberal thug traitor politician. He would philosophically and ethically fit perfectly right in with Hillary, Daschle, Schumer, Corzine, ad nauseum.

10 posted on 04/07/2003 3:02:05 PM PDT by friendly
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
Hey, don't you guys go dissin' my man Bob! Who would have thought that the biggest star of the war would turn out to be a stand-up comedian?

To U.S. claims that Coalition forces had taken the ministry itself, the minister adamantly declared, "Absolutely that's not true. I can tell you that because I am here at the Ministry of Information."

That one was beatiful. He was, in fact, across the river at the time. The U.S. battalion commander was quoted as saying "I'd like a word with the Minister of Information. He can find me in the tank outside his office."

11 posted on 04/07/2003 3:02:27 PM PDT by Billthedrill
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Grampa Dave
WHOA! If that's what I think it is, that is a VERY, VERY nice bottle of French Bordeaux. Must have liberated it from Saddam's cellar.
12 posted on 04/07/2003 3:03:15 PM PDT by AnAmericanMother (. . . there is nothing new under the sun.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
The sad fact is that most Arabs actually believe this guy.
13 posted on 04/07/2003 3:04:19 PM PDT by dfwgator
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
Chemical Agent Found at Information Ministry

(2003-04-07) -- Coalition troops now in the heart of Baghdad have discovered a massive cache of the chemical agent lysergic acid diethylamide.

The Iraqi Information Ministry has been identified as the site of a huge repository of the substance, commonly called LSD.

"After listening to recent statements from the Iraqi Information Minister, we had suspected there were large quantities of LSD in the building," said an unnamed Pentagon spokesman.

Information Minister Mohammed Saeed al-Sahaf called on the United Nations to address the "immanent humanitarian medical crisis."

"There is no way I can do my job effectively without this essential medication," said Mr. al-Sahaf. "Without LSD, I cannot stand up before the people and say 'Be assured, Baghdad is safe, protected. Iraqis are heroes.'

Mr. al-Sahaf said the 'medicine' helps him to see Abrams tanks as gentle lavender camels and Bradley fighting vehicles as enormous pansies and petunias.

-- from Scrappleface.com
14 posted on 04/07/2003 3:07:26 PM PDT by MediaMole
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical

15 posted on 04/07/2003 3:08:07 PM PDT by Maedhros (He hate me.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
There are no troops in Bagdad.....yaah that's the ticket!
16 posted on 04/07/2003 3:13:15 PM PDT by Mat_Helm
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
I want to see Col North show up on Fox at one of his briefings!
17 posted on 04/07/2003 3:13:42 PM PDT by gaucho (Baghdad or bust! In the endzone!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Black Bart
"They are commiting suicide against the gates of Baghdad"!

John F. Kerry's gonna hire him to write his speeches.

18 posted on 04/07/2003 3:16:41 PM PDT by husky ed (FOX NEWS ALERT "Generalissimo Francisco Franco is still dead" THIS HAS BEEN A FOX NEWS ALERT)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 7 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
Mohammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, Iraq's minister of information, says U.S. forces were repulsed when they tried to advance on Baghdad from the south. "We were able to chop off their rotten heads," he said. It appears Mr. Saeed al-Sahhaf will soon have to seek other employment. Where can he possibly get a job? He's totally detached from reality. He tells bald-faced lies with no sense of guilt or embarrassment. And he vehemently hates the United States, particularly our military. Where would such a person be welcomed?

By Jove, I've got it! Mr. Saeed al-Sahhaf can always find a gig with the Democratic National Committee. His skills won't be wasted there.

Michael M. Bates: My Side of the Swamp

19 posted on 04/07/2003 3:17:56 PM PDT by mikeb704
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
He reminds me of Americans who vote for Democrats because the Democrats are the party of the "common people". The disconnet from the real truth here is amazing on both counts.
20 posted on 04/07/2003 3:19:23 PM PDT by swampfox98
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
Rush had a good one today. He said the Iraqi Information Ministry said that they had attacked the US on our soil, taken control of Yankee Stadium, and were marching down Broadway to seize all theater tickets.
21 posted on 04/07/2003 3:20:48 PM PDT by Chirodoc
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
I caught his rantings on FNC last night. Did anyone else notice the Fox translator laughing at this goofball?

Æ
22 posted on 04/07/2003 3:23:47 PM PDT by AgentEcho (If you're in a fair fight you've done something wrong.)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
Oh, thank you so much for posting this! I was unaware of this publication and I love the present column and loved equally well the column on Tom, Dan, & Peter which I saw when I went over to their site -- it's just as hysterically funny as this one!
23 posted on 04/07/2003 3:26:13 PM PDT by Amore (I hate tag lines)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: AgentEcho
Yeah - earlier in the war that translator was doing his best to stifle it. These days he's not even trying.
24 posted on 04/07/2003 3:26:40 PM PDT by Billthedrill
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 22 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
Hey, leave baghdad bob alone. He's entertainment for the troops. They need a good laugh.
25 posted on 04/07/2003 3:26:56 PM PDT by chainsaw
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
Bob could be the next Eveready bunny...
26 posted on 04/07/2003 3:28:01 PM PDT by EaglesUpForever (Ne messez pas avec le US)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Mat_Helm
There are no troops in Bagdad.....yaah that's the ticket

I heard that from my wife...Morgan Fairchild.

27 posted on 04/07/2003 3:28:22 PM PDT by dfwgator
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 16 | View Replies]

To: Grampa Dave

Left to right, Colin Ferguson, defendant; Colin Ferguson defense attorney.

Colin Ferguson, the man accused of killing six and injuring 19 on the Long Island Railroad in 1993, announced that he plans to take the witness stand next week and cross-examine himself. He continues to insist that he didn't shoot anyone and that it was a white man that took his gun, while he was asleep, and proceded to shoot everyone.

To spearhead his appeal next month, Ferguson has denied rumors he had selected the Iraqi minister of information.

"Dot mon geev Colin Ferguson thee heebie-jeebies; he possessed of demons," Ferguson said.

28 posted on 04/07/2003 3:34:23 PM PDT by PhilDragoo (Hitlery: das Butch von Buchenvald)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
Actually, it all rings rather familiar. Me thinks Baghdad Bob must have graduated from an American CEO University (correspondence courses?) You all recall Ken Lay in the final days before Enron declared bankrupcy? I tell you, I watched several successive CEO's of a billion $ enterprise talk the talk of Ken Lay and Baghdad Bob all the while the company was steadily sinking and finally sank to Chapter 7. Happy talk and nothing but! Standard Operating Procedure!
29 posted on 04/07/2003 3:35:05 PM PDT by Revolting cat! (Subvert the dominant cliche!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
Rush said the dems should hire "Baghdad Bob" to run their radio show; he's so good at disinformation, and he's funny.
30 posted on 04/07/2003 3:37:11 PM PDT by The Final Harvest
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Grampa Dave

31 posted on 04/07/2003 3:38:10 PM PDT by Howlin ("I do believe this city is freakin' ours." -- Capt. Chris Carter of Watkinsville Ga)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 5 | View Replies]

To: Howlin
BTW, that is a REAL screen capture, not altered.
32 posted on 04/07/2003 3:38:36 PM PDT by Howlin ("I do believe this city is freakin' ours." -- Capt. Chris Carter of Watkinsville Ga)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 31 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical
Given his conviction to carry this to the end, I suspect Saddam has his family somewhere 'safe' and told him what to say. Until the regime falls and he knows those that threaten him and his family are dead, he'll continue to the end.
33 posted on 04/07/2003 3:42:27 PM PDT by mpreston
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical

"Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld, a Republican, continues to call the election of Baghdad as he sees it."
34 posted on 04/07/2003 3:44:54 PM PDT by PhilDragoo (Hitlery: das Butch von Buchenvald)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Howlin
Saw it. Durn near died. Tell me the folks at FSN weren't having fun with that one!
35 posted on 04/07/2003 3:45:33 PM PDT by Billthedrill
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 32 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical; Happygal
I remember when I first saw Baghdad Bob after the war began - the man was in hysterics after the decapitation strike occured: the best he could stammer out was that Bush was "stupid, and he is condemned. He is....condemned!"

The fact that he couldn't find anything more creative than that spoke volumes. Iraq is run not only by murderers and tyrants, but idiots as well. Chemical Ali, I've heard, can barely read, Uday is a psychopath, Qusay obviously gets his military strategy with the free prize in Corn Flakes boxes. Their propaganda is dim-witted: endless music videos showing young men in cheap suits on a stage, singing Saddam's praises, interspersed with video of Saddam meeting world leaders - also, pictures of parades of missiles and soldiers doing that "hopping march" that only idiot dictatorships can make the military do. No, the Allies are not stupid - Iraq is run by stupid, venal, evil men. I hope that Baghdad Bob learns how truly stupid HE is.

Regards, Ivan

36 posted on 04/07/2003 3:49:18 PM PDT by MadIvan
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical; JennysCool
Another entertaining and insightful essay from Iconoclast's inimitable Lin Anderson

Lin who? Never heard of him! ;-)

37 posted on 04/07/2003 3:52:19 PM PDT by Happygal (I'm sure there is a biblical passage to support my view)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: Grampa Dave
I am starting to think this idiot is our CIA agent. He is just way to funny!
38 posted on 04/07/2003 3:59:38 PM PDT by LUVYA DUBYA 2000 ( George W. exceeded all expectations!!!! WTG DUBYA!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 3 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical

Over on another thread, they're talking about how our ELINT guys have been listening in as various Iraqi Generals call in to Qusay (he seems to be alive, and in charge) to bring him up to date. Apparently, it's the Generals who are feeding this crap into headquarters. They are telling Qusay that they are defeating the Americans, that they have re-captured the airport, that they still hold all these cities down South, and so on.

It would seem that the penalty for bringing Qusay bad news is sufficiently high that even top Generals won't do it. Baghdad Bob might not even know he's lying; he may be passing along exactly what the Iraqi military is telling him.

The good news is that all this BS has probably led Qusay (who may be the only one left alive) to wait too long to make his escape. Our own press assisted with this, by talking about all these "pauses" and logistical snafus that were supposedly going to have us cooling our heels outside Baghdad for at least a couple of weeks. By the time Qusay figured out he'd been had, the escape routes were closed and the tanks were in the city.


39 posted on 04/07/2003 4:02:05 PM PDT by Nick Danger (More rallys planned! www.freerepublic.net)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

To: LUVYA DUBYA 2000
Actually, he reminds ME of the shreiking left wing, lying heads on ABCNNBCBS.
40 posted on 04/07/2003 4:03:20 PM PDT by Grampa Dave (If you like a Strong Free Republic, become monthly donor!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 38 | View Replies]

To: Nick Danger
Is Qusay Iraqi for craven coward pussy?
41 posted on 04/07/2003 4:07:49 PM PDT by Grampa Dave (If you like a Strong Free Republic, become monthly donor!)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 39 | View Replies]

To: Grampa Dave
Actually, he reminds ME of the shreiking left wing, lying heads on ABCNNBCBS.

Tonight we begin with what the Bush Administration is calling its "invasion of Baghdad."

We'd like to point out that not all of us in the news business are particularly impressed with Mr. Bush's claims.

We have credible reports from Iraq's minister of information that there are in fact no we repeat no American tanks in the capital city.

Certainly the Centcom briefings are not as persuasive as this autobody undercoat I've sprayed on my head to cover my scalp.

42 posted on 04/07/2003 4:11:02 PM PDT by PhilDragoo (Hitlery: das Butch von Buchenvald)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 40 | View Replies]

To: Howlin
CLASSIC!
43 posted on 04/07/2003 4:15:11 PM PDT by Stultis
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 31 | View Replies]

To: PhilDragoo
LOL! Keep 'em comin! What about Tom Brokaw? Hee hee.
44 posted on 04/07/2003 4:15:47 PM PDT by tame
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 42 | View Replies]

To: South40
EXCELLENT!!!
45 posted on 04/07/2003 4:17:08 PM PDT by facedown (Armed in the Heartland)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 8 | View Replies]

To: Howlin
You can tell that officer is Southern, with the way he says, "I do believe..."
46 posted on 04/07/2003 4:23:49 PM PDT by wimpycat ('Nemo me impune lacessit')
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 31 | View Replies]

To: mikeb704
i understand that hitlery is looking for a VLWC campaign manager for 2004 he looks like a strong candidate
47 posted on 04/07/2003 4:26:52 PM PDT by mt tom
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 19 | View Replies]

To: Apolitical

There's a similarity here.

48 posted on 04/07/2003 4:32:39 PM PDT by Redcloak (All work and no FReep makes Jack a dull boy. All work and no FReep make s Jack a dul boy. Allwork an)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 1 | View Replies]

Comment #49 Removed by Moderator

To: Stultis
Don't you just LOVE FR for that one reason?????
50 posted on 04/07/2003 4:36:57 PM PDT by Howlin ("I do believe this city is freakin' ours." -- Capt. Chris Carter of Watkinsville Ga)
[ Post Reply | Private Reply | To 43 | View Replies]


Navigation: use the links below to view more comments.
first 1-5051-66 next last

Disclaimer: Opinions posted on Free Republic are those of the individual posters and do not necessarily represent the opinion of Free Republic or its management. All materials posted herein are protected by copyright law and the exemption for fair use of copyrighted works.

Free Republic
Browse · Search
News/Activism
Topics · Post Article

FreeRepublic, LLC, PO BOX 9771, FRESNO, CA 93794
FreeRepublic.com is powered by software copyright 2000-2008 John Robinson