Democrats to adopt Iraqi 'super lies'? (Dems to learn from "Baghdad Bob" -- funny)

WorldNetDaily ^ | April 14, 2003 | Joe Kovacs

[FairOpinion]

In the 1980s, one of my favorite characters on "Saturday Night Live" was the hilarious pathological liar Tommy Flanagan, portrayed by comedian Jon Lovitz. He was the guy who claimed to be simultaneously married to Morgan Fairchild and a "young Elizabeth Taylor," and made "Yeah, that's the ticket!" a national catchphrase.

Now, many years later, the Flanagan legacy lives on – this time in reality TV in coverage of the war with Iraq.

Muhammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, a.k.a "Baghdad Bob"

The part of the lovable liar who seems to go out of his way to flay the truth is Iraqi information minister Muhammed Saeed al-Sahhaf, dubbed "Baghdad Bob" by the likes of Fox News. He's the steadfast defender of Saddam Hussein's regime, possibly still denying there are any Americans in Iraq.

While Saddam's star is fading, al-Sahhaf's profile is skyrocketing with a new website dedicated to praise for him. It's called WeLoveTheIraqiInformationMinister.com, and was created last week by Kieran Mulvaney, a British native and former Greenpeace activist now living in Alaska.

"I mentioned to one of my friends that the best part [of the war coverage] is watching this guy," Mulvaney told Reuters. "He is so brazen that I could almost admire him."

Within three days, Mulvaney and his buds put together the page, just in time for the fall of Baghdad and the disappearance of al-Sahaf – or, as the site puts it, the beginning of "administrative leave."

The site documents a listing of some of Sahaf's best quotes:

"There are no American infidels in Baghdad. Never!"

"My feelings – as usual – we will slaughter them all."

"Our initial assessment is that they will all die."

"I blame Al-Jazeera – they are marketing for the Americans!"

"God will roast their stomachs in hell at the hands of Iraqis."

"They're coming to surrender or be burned in their tanks."

"No I am not scared and neither should you be!"

"We are not afraid of the Americans. Allah has condemned them. They are stupid. They are stupid ... and they are condemned."

"Let the American infidels bask in their illusion."

"I triple guarantee you, there are no American soldiers in Baghdad."

"We are in control. They are in a state of hysteria. Losers, they think that by killing civilians and trying to distort the feelings of the people they will win. I think they will not win, those bastards."

"We have placed them in a quagmire from which they can never emerge except dead."

"Washington has thrown their soldiers on the fire."

"I speak better English than this villain Bush." Such command of English vocabulary exudes credibility and commands respect from anyone within earshot. At the very least, the humor factor invokes a sense of joviality and a dash of forgiveness.

So the infomeister's comments got me thinking: What if some Americans with credibility problems adopted his technique of making lies entertaining?

Could they free themselves from the pit of disdain? Can the Democratic Party save itself by emulating Baghdad Bob? Learning to be a bit more "Sahaf-spoken" as I call it just might do the trick.

Here are some examples I came up with.

Martin Sheen: "I'm a much better president than this villain Bush. Thank God 'West Wing' is not just a television show. Becoming supreme leader in this glorious fashion will have the infidels enjoying my legacy and that of my sons Charlie and Emilio for generations to come."

The Dixie Chicks: "Our initial assessment is that our career is tanking, but we're still ecstatic. Performing at birthday parties is a much more intimate and rewarding experience than having millions of adoring fans filling our bank accounts."

Al Gore: "Let the American infidels bask in their illusion that George W. Bush won in 2000. At least I have my Internet."

Geraldo Rivera: "Washington has thrown my mustache on the fire."

Peter Arnett: "I blame NBC – they are marketing for the Americans!"

Tom Daschle: "We Democrats are in control. They, the Republicans, are in a state of hysteria. Losers, they think that by stealing elections and trying to distort the feelings of the people they will win. I think they will not win, those bastards."

Janet Reno: "Of course I support heterosexual rights. Why wouldn't I?"

Bill Clinton: "When I said 'I did not have sexual relations with that woman,' I was really referring to the infidel Hillary."

Hillary Clinton: "Like all New Yorkers, I feel pretty, oh so pretty."

Janeane Garofalo: "My feelings – as usual – I have slaughtered them all. I can't tell you how honored I am to be this mutli-million dollar box-office draw. Thank goodness Americans flock in droves to see my brilliance, giving me this firm foundation of credibility."

Richard Gere: "I was just kidding about all that Buddhism stuff. I'm really a Muslim."

Rosie O'Donnell: "God will roast my stomach in hell."

Rev. Jesse Jackson: "There's no 'love child' in my family. Never!"

Rev. Al Sharpton: "Hey, save some of Rosie's roasted stomach for me!"

Michael Moore: "No, I am not American, and neither should you be!"

Alec Baldwin: "I have placed myself in a quagmire from which I can never emerge – except in France."

The French: "We're coming to surrender or be burned in our tanks – if we had any."

California Gov. Gray Davis: "I triple guarantee you, there are no blackouts this summer." The potential for quotes is almost endless. But this might prompt the rodents in your brain to get on the exercise wheel to help you think up some more, and it just may better prepare you to handle the forthcoming propaganda in the next election cycle.

[FairOpinion]

This would be funny, if the Democrats hadn't already adopted the style of Baghdad Bob, of using outrageous lies, keep repeating them and hope people will believe them.

My favorite from the article:

Al Gore: "Let the American infidels bask in their illusion that George W. Bush won in 2000. At least I have my Internet."

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[FairOpinion]

Ping

And on second thought I think this is pretty good too:

Tom Daschle: "We Democrats are in control. They, the Republicans, are in a state of hysteria. Losers, they think that by stealing elections and trying to distort the feelings of the people they will win. I think they will not win, those bastards."

[DED]

The author has missed the real point.
Baghdad Bob learned his skills listening to Bill Clinton and other Democrats, who believe if you repeat a lie often enough, (gullible) people will eventually take it for the truth.

[Mind-numbed Robot]

....and was created last week by Kieran Mulvaney, a British native and former Greenpeace activist now living in Alaska.

Wow. A reformed Greenpeacer. How novel. Funny, too.

[PeaceBeWithYou]

Wow. A reformed Greenpeacer. How novel. Funny, too.

Not as rare as you think, surviving Greenpeace co-founder Dr. Patrick Moore renounced them when the watermelons infested and subverted the movement, and the same thing happened to the Sierra Club. Moore now runs Greenspirt, advocates growing more trees, using the wood and supports Bjorn Lombard as well as denounces Scientific American.

Niether Greenpeace or Sierra Club started out as radical orgs, but were co-opted by the radical Marxist spawned in the 50's & 60's.

[victim soul]

You forgot the enablers of these liars -- the unquestioning and parroting press!!

[DBtoo]

I liked the one where he said we are rascals and sickheads.

[pragmatic_asian]

Greenpeace is just an organization of hypocrites. Of course they're against the war and they tried to stop an Aussie war ship a couple of days ago but I've yet to hear them denounce Saddam once yet. Saddam released 15 time the oil spilled by the Exxon Valdez during the first Gulf War. The oil fires he ordered set put a year of 500 million SUV's worth of carbon into the atmosphere. He deliberately destroyed the marshes of Iraq of which only 10% remain. I guess destroying the habitat of 400,000 people is ok (not to mention actually killing 200,000+ of the Marsh Arabs) but don't you dare harm a single spotted owl. Why no condemnation of the worse ecological villian ever?

[Hugin]

I heard some interesting things about Baghdad Bob the other day. Although he played his role to the hilt, he is (was) no fool. He has a PHD in English Literature and was going to be a professor at Baghdad University until he took up with Saddam in the 60s. He actually speaks flawless English with almost no accent. The accent in the press conferences is put on for the benefit of Arab audiences.

Back in the 60s when the Baath party took over in Iraq and Saddam was one of the top guys, but not yet the leader, Bob's brother in law was on run from the party. Bob turned him in to be executed. Ever since then he has been extremely tight with Saddam. He has been openly critical of Uday who ran the Iraqi state TV and newspaper, and journalists union, and at one point Uday threatened to have him killed. The fact that he was still alive and in office shows just how close to Saddam he was, since ticking off Uday usually meant a quick trip to a torture chamber.

On the day of his last press conference he told all the journalists that they owed money to pay for the cost of their "minders" and they had to pay it immediately, in cash. He collected about $200,000 dollars and hasn't been seen since.

[bybybill]

This is a little off the subject but it`s funny...My Lebonese Grandma, a gentle soul, got mad at my Dad once and , in Arabic , cussed him out with a common Arabic insult.. Later, I asked Dad what did she say? He laughed, and translated:" May a burning stick be placed in the womb of the woman that bore you" Man, that`s tough. [ I don`t ever think she figured out thereal joke]

[capocchio]

"listening to Bill Clinton and other Democrats"

Right on! I sent the following letter to The Washington Times and to several Congressmen.

Nancy Pelosi, Democrat leader in the House, thinks she could have brought down the statue of Saddam Hussein in Baghdad for less money. Prey tell, HOW?

Standing off shore and firing missiles? Clinton tried that in his 1998 "Monica Storm" campaign, and it didn’t even deter the House from impeaching him.

Having Jim McDermott dance in the streets of Baghdad? We didn’t see any wild celebrations by the Iraqi’s then, did we? (p> Nothing like "Iraqi Freedom" happened on Mr. Clinton’s watch either. Not after the WTC attack in 1993, Mogadishu in 1993, Khobar Towers in 1995, or attacks on US embassies in Africa in 1998 and on the USS Cole in 2000. All Mr. Clinton accomplished was to provoke September 11 and provide material for Iraqi training films on how to defeat the Americans (Black Hawk Down).

Clinton also tried the less money route, but what America got in return was a weakening of her capabilities. His disdain for the military destroyed their morale, his implementation of political correctness policies brought down their effectiveness, he used up munitions stocks while not replenishing them, and his budget cuts slowed critical weapons development programs

Call in Mr. Carter? Well, his track record includes a blindness that allowed N. Korea to continue their nuclear weapons program, and a political partisanship that led him to ask Russia’s secret service to help defeat Reagan. Twice even!

Have the UN uncover WMD’s? What a sick joke! We’re seeing how sick now, and will see more evidence of their inspectors’ incompetence in future days.

And how Ms. Pelosi would you have freed the children from Saddam’s prisons? Call in Janet Reno? Well, she accomplished the opposite result in Waco, and sending Elian Gonzales back into the prison of Cuba was a disgusting travesty to justice and humanity.

Bring the statue down for less money? No Ms. Pelosi, I don’t think so. Neither you, nor anyone in your party has the foresight, the desire, nor the will to bring about what President Bush and his team have done. In three short weeks!

Your party’s methods have been proven to provoke tyrants rather than deter them, to prolong suffering rather than to halt it, to leave America open for attack rather than to secure her shores. All with unnecessary and high costs in lives, freedom, national security and, in the long run, money.

Shame on you, Ms. Pelosi, shame on your party, shame on your sick and continual criticism of a country whom you are unfit to serve.

DED, Re your tag line. I like to think of the Democrats as "Learning Disabled". or LD (whick fits right in with Liberal Democrats). So just refer to them as LD's, and we get a double entendre. Of course one could trump that with a triple entendre, but I haven't come up with that trifecta yet.

TTFN

[tame]

[swheats]

"We are in control. They are in a state of hysteria. Losers, they think that by killing civilians and trying to distort the feelings of the people they will win. I think they will not win, those bastards."

I think the interpreter was laughing at this one. LOL

[marsh2]

That must be "Bat Boy's" grandpa. I did catch a photo in the Enquirer or the like that Bat Boy was in Iraq and had met with Saddam.

[FairOpinion]

Baghdad Bob: "We are in control. They are in a state of hysteria. Losers, they think that by killing civilians and trying to distort the feelings of the people they will win. I think they will not win, those bastards."

And the Democrats' equivalent (from second part of article):

Tom Daschle: "We Democrats are in control. They, the Republicans, are in a state of hysteria. Losers, they think that by stealing elections and trying to distort the feelings of the people they will win. I think they will not win, those bastards."

[Mind-numbed Robot]

Why no condemnation of the worse ecological villain ever?

You point out some excellent examples of their hypocrisy but we already knew that, didn't we? The thing to keep pointing out, as you did, is that their proclaimed aims are not their true aims. Everything they and the others of their ilk do is for one reason - the destruction of the USA. We need to keep hammering on that obvious, to us, point.

[Mind-numbed Robot]

Niether Greenpeace or Sierra Club started out as radical orgs, but were co-opted by the radical Marxist spawned in the 50's & 60's.

Typical lefty tactic, infiltrate, outnumber, then take over. Has happened to many of our organizations - the ACLU, many churches, our school system, the unions (although some unions started out that way), etc., etc. Ralph Nadar was an early pioneer, also.

Thanks for the information about Greenpeace and the Sierra Club.