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The Juanita Broaddrick Chapter in Hillary's Book (ghostwriter -- DFU)
DFU | 4-2003 | dfu

Posted on 04/28/2003 7:52:21 PM PDT by doug from upland

Hillary Rodham Clinton has finished her book. It will hit the bookstores soon. Unfortunately, she did not do a chapter on Juanita Broaddrick. If any of your friends actually buy her work of fiction, please give them this additional chapter to read. Someone had to do it, and I was glad to be of service.

=====================================================

(SUPPLEMENTAL CHAPTER - ghostwriter Doug from Upland)

I never wanted to write this (expletive deleted) chapter, but the (expletive deleted) at the publishing company told me I would have to give back all the money. So, here we go.

Bill grew tired of me very quickly. When Chelsea was born, I once heard him singing that he wanted a d-i-v-o-r-c-e. He really is a selfish (expletive deleted), but I needed him to get where I wanted to go. Oh, well, I have gotten by with my sex toys, an occasional fling with a female, and some good times with Vince. I sure do miss him.

Two things worried me during the 1992 campaign. One was Juanita Broaddrick and the other is a woman I will not reveal. The second was a rape victim of my husband during his first term of governor. I still worry that she will come forward.

After serving as attorney general, we had discussed running for Senate in 1978. David Pryor was planning his second run, and the field for the Democratic nomination included Jim Guy Tucker and Ray Thornton. Pryor actually convinced Bill to go for the governorship, although the Senate really was our first choice. With info we had gathered from the office of the attorney general, we could have dirtied up anyone who posed a challenge to us.

Juanita Broaddrick. What can I say? She almost kept us out of the White House and almost got Bill convicted in the Senate.

Broaddrick had volunteered to work on Bill's campaign after an earlier meeting at her care facility. Bill handed her some load of crap about how he was really concerned with care facilities such as hers. Like most people, she fell for it.

It was an April day that I remember vividly. It was a day that almost destroyed everything. I got word from someone who was spying on Bill for me. Yes, I knew he would screw anything that walked, but as long as he was my meal ticket to power, I was determined not to get off the gravy train. In this case, however, the report hit me right in the gut. He assaulted and hurt Broaddrick. What in the hell was he thinking?

I dropped what I was doing and without knocking stormed into a strategy meeting of Larry Nichols, whom I never trusted, and Raymond "Buddy" Young. Young knew better than to ever cross me.

"You'll never guess what the (expletive deleted) has done now," I screamed. "He tried to rape some bitch." I knew it was more than a try and had no doubt that he did it. But I just couldn't say it.

So I looked at Nichols and Young and said to them that one of them had better squash this (expletive deleted) story or heads were going to roll. They knew I was serious.

Broaddrick's marriage (she was known as Hickey at the time), I had discovered, was over. She was seeing another man whom would later become her husband. I knew she was in a precarious position. It was 1978 in Arkansas. A very powerful man in a one-party state has assaulted her. He was a popular attorney general. Even if she had come forward, who would believe her? The double whammy was that she would get no strength from her husband because their relationship was over.

A few weeks later, I was not surprised to see Broaddrick attend a campaign event to which she had committed. She was very important in the campaign, had all the campaign materials, and would not have a good enough excuse for her husband as to why she couldn't attend. No matter what sickness she may have feigned, she had to be there.

On the way to the event from the airport, I told the driver that Bill had talked so much about Juanita and that I was so anxious to meet her.

When I got there, I wasted no time. I entered the room, headed directly for her, and grabbed her hand. My memory is flawless, and I remember every detail about everything. Too bad for the fools from Ken Starr's office that "I can't recall" is just a lawyer's ploy. Those idiots were putty in my hands.

I thanked Juanita for everything she has done for Bill. But I didn't let go. I drew her closer to me and looked at her with as cold a stare as I could muster. "Everything you do for Bill," I repeated. Judging by the look on her face, I could tell she was frightened, shaken, and definitely got the message. In very short order, she left the event. Broaddrick was taken out of play that night as an obstacle. But in 1992, I still had some worries.

Fortunately, the right wing Clinton haters did not have Broaddrick come forward sooner. It would have sent us back to Arkansas, resulted in a divorce, and sent me to greener pastures. At least on the bright side, I would have been able to get away from the lowlife hicks in that pathetic state. Ma and Pa kettle can kiss my ass.

When the Paula Jones case was not settled, I went ballistic. I had told the (expletive deleted) attorneys to quietly settle this without an apology and make it go away. But the (expletive deleted) idiots could not even do that simple task. It takes a (expletive deleted) village to settle a case I guess.

If it were necessary, I would have paid Jones a hundred grand to go away. Hell, we could have gotten that from Lassater and Tyson.

When Bruce Lindsey convinced her counsel that a simple affidavit would keep her out of court, I thought the problem was solved. Rape is traumatic. She didn't want to relive it in public. She certainly didn't want to be grilled under oath, subsequently reading salacious headlines in the Enquirer, Star, (expletive deleted) Washington Times, and Wall Street Journal. It really was a good way out for her.

But the plan all turned to (expletive deleted) when we discovered that Broaddrick was going to be called in the Jones case. Phillip Yoakum and other yahoos had pushed this (expletive deleted) story and were determined to destroy us. I confronted Lindsey. He took an ashtray to the side of his head because he let this thing get out of hand.

It was a horrible time for me. I couldn't sleep. Bill could even hear me from his bedroom asking Eleanor Roosevelt for help. What would NOW do? They didn't like us trashing women in public but pretty much had been AWOL in this whole thing. Their big mouths could be damaging if they turned against us. Fortunately, we gave them taxpayer money, I had certain info in FBI files, and Bill's strong abortion stand got them to take a dive for us. I sometimes daydreamed, picturing the face of several NOW leaders on the body of Roberto Duran saying "No mas."

Lindsey and I had many late night meetings to discuss keeping a lid on this thing. Just like we did to others who might turn on us, we had a plan of attack to go after Broaddrick's credibility and lessen her impact. If things had reached meltdown, we even had discussed calling in Terry Lenzner and arranging an "accident." He was of great help in 1992. No one can intimidate witnesses like Lenzner. Broaddrick was fortunate indeed that Trent Lott kept her away from a national television audience in front of the Senate. I could not let that happen.

By the way, I want to issue a few warnings to a few people who are still a pain in my butt. David Schippers, I am pretty damned tired of hearing you speak about me in public and in that silly little book your wrote. When I make it back to the White House, you are going to pay.

And to you sitting in front of your keyboard in Fresno, California. Yes, you, Jim Robinson. You are going to pay dearly before I am finished. Count on it.

So that, ladies and gentlemen, is how a rapist managed to survive in office. I am damned good at what I do. It is so easy to get really foolish little people and intellectuals to stick with us. Perky Katie Couric has been one of our greatest assets and shills. How funny. She still calls herself a "jounalist." What a sense of humor.

And how about that Joe Conason. I doubt that there has ever been a more loyal buttboy.

Here is the lesson we have taught to everyone. (Expletive deleted) with me and you will be the one who gets (expletive deleted).


TOPICS: Business/Economy; Crime/Corruption; Government; News/Current Events; Politics/Elections
KEYWORDS: broaddrick; evil; governor; rapist; satansdaughter; witch

1 posted on 04/28/2003 7:52:22 PM PDT by doug from upland
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To: doug from upland
The problem is, if this chapter appeared in her book, it would result in her being labeled as a brave honest modern woman.
2 posted on 04/28/2003 8:02:25 PM PDT by RLK
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To: doug from upland
Damn fine excerpt, when do we get the "rest of the story"
3 posted on 04/28/2003 8:02:27 PM PDT by BOBTHENAILER (Just like Black September. One by one, we're gonna get 'em.)
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To: All
LIVING HISTORY --- it will be a crock
4 posted on 04/28/2003 8:04:47 PM PDT by doug from upland (- to Bill -"You are not fit to be commander in chief" -- father of Sgt. Shughart who died in Somalia)
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To: doug from upland
What does DFU mean? I'm still learning.
5 posted on 04/28/2003 8:06:41 PM PDT by annyokie
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To: doug from upland

6 posted on 04/28/2003 8:07:42 PM PDT by happydogdesign
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To: annyokie
DFU = Doug from Upland
7 posted on 04/28/2003 8:09:18 PM PDT by doug from upland (- to Bill -"You are not fit to be commander in chief" -- father of Sgt. Shughart who died in Somalia)
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To: StarFan; dutchess
Pass on to your friends.
8 posted on 04/28/2003 8:13:21 PM PDT by doug from upland (- to Bill -"You are not fit to be commander in chief" -- father of Sgt. Shughart who died in Somalia)
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To: doug from upland
left wing conspiracy bump
9 posted on 04/28/2003 8:14:53 PM PDT by green team 1999
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To: doug from upland
Now that is freeping believable! Excellent translation of the syrupy egotistical fantastical writings Mrs. Clinton will certainly endeavor to pass off as a legitimate recollection of her co-presidency.
10 posted on 04/28/2003 8:15:11 PM PDT by harpo11 (Godspeed Brave USA Troops! My Families Thoughts and Prayers are Being Sent to YOU!)
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To: doug from upland
Well done.
11 posted on 04/28/2003 8:16:52 PM PDT by Diddle E. Squat
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To: doug from upland
Stupid me, I figured that out after I sent my thing to you.
12 posted on 04/28/2003 8:18:01 PM PDT by annyokie
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To: doug from upland

Hey Doug!

You're really,really good.


13 posted on 04/28/2003 8:22:16 PM PDT by joanofarc
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To: doug from upland
"When Chelsea was born, I couldn't tell him it was Web's Child, we had an open marrige, the stress was beyond comprehention, with his infirmaties we couldn't safely bring a child into the world, drugs, stds, and my love for the closet maid, how could I tell him it wasn't ours?"

"Web rolled over and admitted to Bill that Cheslea was his, he went on a tyrade, dragging hundred dollar bills through all of the trailer parks in Arkansas, looking for the elusive, a ............., and then he saw Broderick, dependant on the state, her husband threatened him, at conferance, a motel room............., put some ice on it."

14 posted on 04/28/2003 8:22:46 PM PDT by Little Bill (No Rats, A.N.S.W.E.R (WWP) is a commie front!!!!)
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To: doug from upland
read later
15 posted on 04/28/2003 8:46:23 PM PDT by LiteKeeper
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To: doug from upland
This book is going to have a dead cat bounce cycle.

16 posted on 04/28/2003 9:15:55 PM PDT by Only1choice____Freedom (PETA - People Endangering Trustworthy Americans)
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To: doug from upland
Great post - I can't imagine the fodder this epic will provide us with.

Either it will be all lies or..... let's face it, it WILL be all lies, or

Maybe Hilary will be providing the answers to the, about, 5 billion - I can't recall's she has testified to.

Do you think, - - - is it remotely possible - - - , that the Hildabeast has SELECTIVE recall?

17 posted on 04/28/2003 9:17:03 PM PDT by mcenedo
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To: mcenedo
Selective recall. Bet your house on it.
18 posted on 04/28/2003 9:20:22 PM PDT by doug from upland (- to Bill -"You are not fit to be commander in chief" -- father of Sgt. Shughart who died in Somalia)
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To: doug from upland
Bravo! I loved it. An excellent portrait of the Hildebeast.
19 posted on 04/28/2003 9:57:10 PM PDT by Rainbow Rising ("President Hillary Clinton" - the 3 most frightening words in the English language.)
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To: happydogdesign
Here's one "stolen" from another thread:

20 posted on 04/28/2003 10:14:47 PM PDT by BenLurkin (Socialism is slavery.)
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To: doug from upland
A "well done" bump for later e-mail rounds.
21 posted on 04/29/2003 2:36:21 AM PDT by NYpeanut
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To: happydogdesign
Even with the extending nose, this is not hillary.

Never, ever did she look like this picture. I wonder who posed for this picture?

Crusty is to old, fat, ugly and perverted to ever look like that.

22 posted on 04/29/2003 4:09:01 AM PDT by chiefqc
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To: doug from upland
Hey Doug, back in 1998 a friend of mine kept sending me things you'd written. He kept saying "YOu have to come to FR."

You've always made it great!
23 posted on 04/29/2003 4:35:35 AM PDT by Jael (The WE? It's "WE the people". You know, of "In order to form a more perfect union" fame)
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To: doug from upland
Great work Doug...you're a ghost(writing)buster.
24 posted on 04/29/2003 4:41:17 AM PDT by PGalt
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To: Jael
Thanks for the kind words. Your friend started sending things in 1998, but it took you until Nov. 2002 to join? What took you so long?
25 posted on 04/29/2003 7:10:13 AM PDT by doug from upland (- to Bill -"You are not fit to be commander in chief" -- father of Sgt. Shughart who died in Somalia)
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To: doug from upland

26 posted on 04/29/2003 2:41:57 PM PDT by Atlas Sneezed ("Democracy, whiskey! And sexy!")
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To: Beelzebubba
Loathing Honesty is much, much better.
27 posted on 04/29/2003 3:32:30 PM PDT by doug from upland (- to Bill -"You are not fit to be commander in chief" -- father of Sgt. Shughart who died in Somalia)
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To: doug from upland
Hey, a 40-year-old rape charge has just forced the Governor General of Australia to resign. Australia's governor-general steps aside.
28 posted on 05/11/2003 4:58:11 AM PDT by aristeides
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To: All
THREE GHOSTWRITERS FOR HER MAJESTY'S AUTOBIOGRAPHY
29 posted on 05/27/2003 7:23:27 PM PDT by doug from upland (my dogs ran from the room when they heard Hillary shrieking on the radio)
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To: doug from upland
Doug: How in the world did you get this excerpt before Drudge got a hold of it? Great job!!
30 posted on 05/27/2003 7:27:11 PM PDT by Pharmboy (Dems lie 'cause they have to...)
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To: doug from upland
Good read. But Ill bet Hillary cussed a lot more..!
31 posted on 05/27/2003 7:33:53 PM PDT by cardinal4 (The Senate Armed Services Comm; the Chinese pipeline into US secrets)
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To: Pharmboy
Come on. I can't reveal my sources.
32 posted on 05/27/2003 7:35:42 PM PDT by doug from upland (my dogs ran from the room when they heard Hillary shrieking on the radio)
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To: doug from upland
I got it! Jayson Blair!
33 posted on 05/27/2003 7:40:19 PM PDT by Pharmboy (Dems lie 'cause they have to...)
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To: doug from upland
What cracks me up Doug, you are spot on. Everything is in time and event order. Great job.
34 posted on 05/27/2003 7:40:44 PM PDT by AGreatPer
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To: doug from upland
Doug, you have just proven that it only takes one writer to write the truth about hillary, but it will take atleast 3 to write her book of lies.
35 posted on 05/27/2003 7:57:47 PM PDT by desertcry
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To: doug from upland
Now you ought to try it as a Mad Lib. It would be hysterical to see how other Freepers fill in the blanks.

-PJ

36 posted on 05/27/2003 8:07:00 PM PDT by Political Junkie Too (It's not safe yet to vote Democrat.)
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To: StarFan
I just heard from Juanita. She appreciated this chapter and said it is both fair to her and accurate. Now, FReepers, is the rest of the country finally going to get the story they can no longer ignore? Can anyone imagine if this woman gets the power of the presidency?

Thank God that no one close to me has been a rape victim. The burden Juanita had to bear in public is unimaginable. This is a case that is crying out for justice. Let's hope that America wakes up about Hillary Clinton before it is too late. She absolutely knows what her husband did but it doesn't matter because she wants power. That is scary.

37 posted on 06/05/2003 10:13:53 AM PDT by doug from upland (Martha is indicted and the Clintons still walk free.........what a country)
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To: AGreatPer
I heard from Juanita. This is absolutely non-fiction.
38 posted on 06/05/2003 11:39:03 AM PDT by doug from upland (Martha is indicted and the Clintons still walk free.........what a country)
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To: All
Bumping for the truth.
39 posted on 06/05/2003 3:09:41 PM PDT by doug from upland (Martha is indicted and the Clintons still walk free.........what a country)
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To: dutchess
Pass this on.
40 posted on 06/05/2003 9:42:46 PM PDT by doug from upland (Martha is indicted and the Clintons still walk free.........what a country)
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To: doug from upland
Great work, Doug. A real keeper.
41 posted on 06/06/2003 9:03:49 AM PDT by freekitty
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To: doug from upland
This is hilarious!
42 posted on 06/10/2003 12:34:03 PM PDT by ftriggerf (i do not have one :()
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To: doug from upland
Footnote to above chapter:

"Oh, and one other thing. Any g****m airport security buffoon who even thinks about stopping my limo for 'security' purposes, had damn well better be inside a tank! I'M the person they're supposed to be keeping secure--not one of the ones they're supposed to check! And that guard had the nerve to make eye contact with me. NO ONE is allowed to raise their eyes to mine."
43 posted on 06/10/2003 8:28:00 PM PDT by Devil_Anse
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*ITCH APPEARS ON LETTERMAN
44 posted on 06/18/2003 10:51:50 AM PDT by doug from upland (Martha is indicted and the Clintons still walk free.........what a country)
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To: doug from upland
LOLOLOL!!!

I hope you get paid for writing in your real life. This is great!!

45 posted on 06/18/2003 11:04:37 AM PDT by <1/1,000,000th%
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Comment #46 Removed by Moderator

To: doug from upland
Nice!
47 posted on 06/19/2003 8:14:13 AM PDT by <1/1,000,000th%
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To: doug from upland

bump


48 posted on 05/17/2005 5:42:33 AM PDT by jws3sticks (Hillary can take a very long walk on a very short pier, anytime, and the sooner the better!)
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